Please please don't spoil the moment by professing love at this stage. Please continue to enjoy the intensity but do hold off a bit. Invite him out again but stay in control for a bit longer. Go to the gym and burn off the intensity; play lure music and wallow in it all but please please hold off a little longer. Encourage him, have loads of fun but keep your cool babe, just a bit longer babe. It is not that I am encouraging an immature approach but some blokes like to enjoy the journey so please don't take him to the destination too quickly. Savour it babe, this is the essence of life...it is the fuel that makes our hearts beat that little faster. Enjoy and report back.
Thank you for the lovely stories, that definitely helps!
Not sure about his confidence with women Imperial. He is a generally confident person but he did tell me he'd been very hurt by his ex and had been hung up on her when they broke up. We have a loose arrangement that I'll go to stay with him in London sometime over the next few months. We've been texting, sending Facebook messages etc this week but I can't tell from them whether he wants anything more than friendship.
I need to be brave and speak to him properly about this I think. He has gone on holiday today, back this time next week
Thank you so much for your advice, I will update when I've had a chance to speak to him
I had the hots for a girl at work for months but thought she was well out of my league, would never be interested in me, didn't want to ruin a good friendship and didn't have the balls to ask her out. Eventually I did via work email one friday afternoon but she didn't reply..... I spent the whole weekend feeling awful , worried that I had oer stepped the mark and had ruined a freindship. Come monday morning it turns out that she had gone home early on friday and hadnt seen my email, she agreed to a drink the following day and we have now been married for 13 years!
Just go for it, you just never know. You dont want to be about to draw your last breath, thinking................. what if?
Somewhat similar story here - we are now married! I LOVE that we were friends first (yes, also for 12 years), knew everything about each other, including families, friends, exes, etc.
It was a bit bumpy at first, and the romance/sex part somewhat awkward in the first few weeks (but not for long) and then it just felt right. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if we had NOT gotten together when we did, and I suspect I would always have regretted it.
Tbh though I am more worried about being rejected. I broke up with my last boyfriend because he was unfaithful to me with another man (sorry for the drip feed) and am not very good at putting my feelings out there for fear of ever being that hurt again.
M and I met 12 years ago at uni and became good friends right away. At that time he had a girlfriend at home and I met someone in the first few weeks who I dated for over 2 years. I always thought he was lovely but we were never single at the same time so thought no more of it and just enjoyed being friends.
We stayed in touch and I visited him a couple of years after graduation. We shared a bed, and kissed a few times, but that was all. We then didn'tsee each other again for nearly 6 years but stayed in contact.
He came to stay last weekend and it was like no time had passed at all. We still get on so well and everywhere we went he would hold my hand or put his arm around me. Again, we shared a bed every night and kissed but didn't take things any further. He said lots of lovely things over the weekend, like that he'd always found me attractive and had a soft spot for me, and that he'd been jealous of my uni boyfriend. So far, so good right?
He went home on Monday and I've realised I am completely in love with him. I'm struggling to eat, sleep, concentrate at work etc and am finding it scary as I've not felt like this in such a long time. But I just don't know whether to tell him how I feel as am really worried that he doesn't feel the same and that telling him would ruin our friendship. Also he lives in London and I'm in Devon so that could be a factor in what happens.
So, wise MNers, what should I do now? I have low self esteem and am just terrified that I'll end up heartbroken. Thanks for reading x