We usually do a nice meal at home, bottle of wine and watch a film or something. This year we're visiting the IL's fairly soon after Valentine's Day and I think we're just going to wait and go out for a meal or to the cinema while we're there (they'll watch the kids for us)
I have never bothered with it. If the only time I get taken out to dinner, bought flowers and chocolate (or cheese, which is nicer), told I look beautiful and I'm loved is on February 14th of every year, he's not worth having as a DP. I want that sort of treatment because he feels like doing it, not because a commercially driven event has reminded him to do so.
I am terrfied of getting something from ex who got me a birthday present, xmas present but nothing from me in a bid to express that I don't want to get back together which is frustrating. God what to do to drive the msg home? I think I will not accept this time. So that is my valentines sorted:refusing present from ex!
Not sure what's appropriate this year? DH had an affair, and we are trying to sort things out, feel that I should buy him a card but feel nauseous when I stand in front of the cards in the shop. Can anybody empathise?
I feel disinterested in VD but unemotional about it - which is great. It must be extra tough in your situation.
I've found the OneBillionRising movement a good focus for the day - have you looked into that at all? Apart from being an amazing movement, it may help you to have a more important feeling different slant to the day.
aftereight try telling your DH that Valentine's Day is too much of a trigger for you and that won't be getting him anything, but that he should do what he thinks is right. Then see if he uses it as an occasion for healing (which might mean he decides to 'cancel' it with you, or mark the occasion anyhow as a sign of his commitment; the indicator being not the gesture or absence of gesture, but how much thought/effort he puts into recognising your conflict and thinking about how to support you through it).
Meditrina very good advice, thanks. I know he has already bought me a card and a small present, and although he means well, it makes my lack of reciprocation seem, well, mean (am aware how nuts that sounds in the circumstances!).
SGB best of luck, be sure to stock up on lots of that discounted chocolate, for purely medicinal purposes of course