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I used to be a nice person until my partner cheated

(26 Posts)
RoxyLady Thu 31-Jan-13 20:16:54

Now Im not. He cheated on me with his ex but we worked it out. Then two weeks after i had my daughter he kissed a girl at his work and sent inappropriate messages to her. I was devastated.
I used to be so nice, never really said boo to a goose but now i find myself calling him out on the tiniest b***sh*t comments he makes. I have no patient whatsoever with him and he says im not doing myself any favours. Ots been 2 years since he kissed that girl but he says i need to get past it or we arent going to make it.
He told me tonight that if this is how its going to be he wpuld find someone else to make him happy.
I said maybe you should have valued the person i was before but you didnt. So whats the point of me being nice. You took advantage of that person.
Anyone else gone through this?

MadAboutHotChoc Mon 04-Feb-13 13:52:49

Yes, this is the kind of hard work that the cheater really needs to do, its so easy to say sorry, I fucked up etc and expect things to go back to the way things used to be. Its like saying sorry after punching someone i.e does not really help and is meaningless.

Not sure if you both have read Shirley Glass's Not Just Friends? This will provide a good starting point for the real work that he needs to do if he wants to save the marriage.

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