Relationship with H has reached rock bottom - no one else involved, no 'big' issues like drink or dv but his laziness and selfishness has worn away any love and respect I had for him. He feels it's all my fault for being 'cold' and 'addicted to conflict'.
We have one ds (13) and my priority is to protect him and make sure we don't make any more of a mess for him than we already have. I always assumed ds would be generally ok with us splitting as H is so useless, does so little that he might as well not be there.
Last summer I packed up all H stuff after a row where he stormed out. Ds asked what I was doing, I told him I was sick of H's behaviour and wanted to give him a wake-up call. This was the first time I had openly showed ds how bad the relationship is. He was amazingly mature about it to me, said perhaps we were both in the wrong. Later texted all his friends very distressed.
When OH came back I told him to either take his stuff and go or else unpack it and make a resolution to improve. He did neither - left his stuff in the bags, muttered something about maybe getting a flat and just carried on as before.
Anyway, ds is taking 4 gcse's this year and will be taking more in years 10 and 11. Not to mention A'levels. The last thing I want to do is screw up his education - I have suffered the relationship for so long it seems almost irrational to finish it at such a crucial time in ds's life. So should I just carry on with it at least until ds has finished his gcse's?
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Should we wait until exams are over before we split?
truthtotell · 26/01/2013 16:48
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