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how to end this friendship

(4 Posts)
giraffee11 Mon 14-Jan-13 12:21:19

I have a griup of.6 friends I have known from school, one of them however Is very unpleasant, she Is constantly rude about others, to their faces and behind their back. She keeps mentioning how fat one friend is even though this friend is at max a Size 12, she hints at It to her face and keeps talking about It to everyone else, consequently this friend now has ridiculously low self esteem..another friend is apparently unattractively skinny, this friend has cf.she flirts very obviously with another friends bf.
Another tme we were having a picnic In the local park, it was a hot day and a group of teenagerss, maybe 14 or 15 were playing frizby, one was wearing shortish shorts, my fcriend kept shouting out that. "she hated seeing teenagers flabby bums" and "no one wants to see your celkulite" v whilst pointing at this girl, who had no bum hanging out of cellulite..eventually this girl just ran off crying, and the rest of us just saT there tryung to get our friend to shut up. After the girl ran off I just lecft.everything she does or says seems to be rude or bitchy to someone else She is not someone I enjoy spending any time with, but as we are a group of friends we meet. up mostly together, and to stop seeing this friend would mean to stop seeing the others, but I just can't be around her without feeling upset, or uncomfortable or angry..is there anyway I can stop seeing her without loosing my othee friends, it seems mean to exclude her from the whole group?

CogitoErgoSometimes Mon 14-Jan-13 13:20:24

Deal with her the way you'd deal with any other bully. i.e. Call her out on her unpleasant behaviour. Tell her you're fed up with the bitchiness. Defend the 'fat' Size 12 friend rather than letting the cattiness pass. Zero tolerance rather than keeping quiet. If the other people in the group are too cowardly to do the same thing and would rather stay around this Queen Bee an put up with her acid tongue accept that you are probably going to have to make new friends.

BTW... it's all very teenage...

annh Mon 14-Jan-13 13:31:55

Why are you ALL putting up with this? Excluding her doesn't mean losing your other friends, surely they are all as fed up of her behaviour as you are? I'm sure the "fat" one, the "skinny" one and the one whose boyfriend she is flirting with won't miss her!

giraffee11 Mon 14-Jan-13 17:28:52

I have spoken to some of the others today and most were fed up too..I guess no one wanted to say anything first but now we have it seems everyone, at least most, feel the same way.it probably quite teenage cos I'm not sure shes ever grown up, whilst the rest of us got jobs, homes and families shes still living at home, we're gonna talk to her when we see her next about It

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