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So, he's on his 2nd and final chance - don't know what to expect

(2 Posts)
KrispyKremed Mon 07-Jan-13 09:10:14

I'll keep it brief as I'm late.

Boyfriend of 7 months acted like a total dick. When confronted he said he did it as he started to worry that he wasn't ready for a long term relationship. Total news to me as this is what I thought we both wanted and to be fair, 7 months suggests more than a casual fling anyway, doesn't it!

So I broke up with him, said if we wanted different things, there was no point. He said he was heartbroken, couldn't live without me and I was on his mind 24/7. He said the whole thing was 100% his fault and pleaded for another chance. I told him to go away and decide whether he was ready for a long term relationship or not. He did - and came back saying he was now 100% dedicated to a future with me.

I decided to give him another chance. We were talking last night and I told him it was still in the back of my mind that he wasn't really ready for this and the whole thing was going to repeat itself a few months down the line when he next "freaks out" about us. He said "All I can do is ask you to trust me and give me time to prove to you how committed I am - I've learn my lesson, realised what it is I truely want and I'm totally dedicated to it now - and I'll prove it to you".

So what does this mean? how exactly will he prove it? by not dumping me a few weeks down the line? how else would he prove it and am I being a twat?

CogitoErgoSometimes Mon 07-Jan-13 09:15:19

Means you judge him by his actions rather than his words and you keep a wary eye out for any hint of backpedalling. Someone threatened with being dumped will often promise to be anything you want them to be in order to get back in your good books. If they're false they won't be able to keep up the pretence.

Important, therefore, to be 100% clear that is is a 'final' chance and be prepared to follow through. Otherwise you're just wasting valuable time.

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