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Forgotten how to handle flirting

(101 Posts)
donnasummer Tue 01-Jan-13 11:03:05

I've been single since the dawn of time. Busy with work, dc. Happy with it, no time for anything else. Then, last night there was someone at a party .. kept flirting with me, kissed me .. and I panicked! Basically froze him out the rest of the evening, it was like being 18 again. It was a small group of friends, mostly in couples, so the kissing stuff was a bit of of place. He and I were the only single ones and it was NYE ...I liked him and was attracted to him but I literally didn't know what to do! Life is just too busy to fit anyone else in and I really am too old for one nighters. I've been on my own with dc this Xmas, then they went to their dad's; I must admit I've felt a few twinges of lonliness. I had more or less accepted that I was over and done on the romantic side of things so it was really disconcerting to think that someone found me attractive, even with the beer googles on. Life is so much simpler when it's just me .. and yet, am I cutting myself off from potential happiness as well as a lot of hassle? It made me realise how useless I am with this side of life. And how I miss having someone, really. How would mnetters handle being kissed at a party? That's it, really. It's a ridiculous question from someone in their forties - years ago I'd have been fine but last night it totally threw me!

SouthernComforts Wed 27-Feb-13 10:42:31

Great thread! Flowers are definitely from the feathered one.

Just ask your mutual friend for his number pleaseeee!

CajaDeLaMemoria Wed 27-Feb-13 10:41:23

Have to say, I agree. Go for it. You have nothing to lose, but if you do nothing, you'll always wonder what if.

Also, I'm bed-bound at the moment and need entertaining, so if you could contact him today and update that'd be good wink

feelokaboutit Wed 27-Feb-13 10:29:26

Plus there are ways to protect yourself so you don't end up trapped. The ground rules are, don't move in together or amalgamate your finances in any way... You can still have fun though... Maybe I am underestimating the emotional damage letting your guard down could do... or like others on this thread, just living vicariously smile!

feelokaboutit Wed 27-Feb-13 10:26:56

Hi donna, I too have read your whole thread and enjoyed it!

It must be chicken man (sorry don't know what else to call him) who sent you the flowers?? Can you get his number off your friend and invite him for lunch or dinner or something - please?? You are thinking of his "bad points" and yes, a fling may be short lived, but you won't know until you try??

How old is he roughly, out of interest?

As someone who is in a totally and utterly unromantic "marriage" (and yes, I mean totally and utterly), I am a little envious envy.

Walkacrossthesand Wed 27-Feb-13 09:07:50

Well, he obviously has the patience to play the long game - 6 weeks since NYE and this happens! Sounds like he has the ear of one of your friends - so i expect he'll have asked when's your birthday.. Hope it's not too long for us to wait, we'll die of impatience grin

donnasummer Tue 26-Feb-13 18:05:30

lol no, and I didn't dust the doorstep for fingerprints either!
you wouldn't see much, is pretty dark here in t'country
I think it's a bit weird not to follow up by providing some kind of hint to his identity but the world's a weird weird place ...

glitch Tue 26-Feb-13 17:59:05

Have you been out to question the neighbours to see if they saw anyone?
Surely if it was him he will make a move soon.

donnasummer Tue 26-Feb-13 16:27:10

another party? good god woman two in one year, who do you think I am paris hilton? grin

donnasummer Tue 26-Feb-13 16:25:44

the card said to (name spelt wrong, but plausibly wrong iyswim) from ?squiggle
the thing that made me wonder about chicken was the preprinted joke thing saying the sender preferred to express themselves with a snog
since all enquiries have drawn a blank I can only conclude it's a local crackpot
was hand delivered while I was at tesco's (the glamour)
actually if it wasn't for this thread I would have forgotten it by now, whereas you romantics are after a stunning finale with fireworks a vicar and a huge cake! I don't use fb much, most of my phone contacts are straight women, gay men and married couples
the only mildly suspicious thing was when I was chatting to my friend about it I said maybe it's a joke and she was convinced it wasn't
whoever it is has miscalculated my level of patience for conundra! with apologies for the lame ending to this brief and tepid romance, I'm afraid it's more anita brookner than el james

glitch Tue 26-Feb-13 14:06:02

Oh my goodness, how exciting (once again with nothing slightly romantic in my life I can live the excitement via you! grin ).
What did the card say? I need details.
Hope it's him.

Cheddars Tue 26-Feb-13 13:55:12

Your friend needs to organise another party chicken suit optional

That way you can both decide without much pressure whether you want to take it further.

ProphetOfDoom Tue 26-Feb-13 13:36:02

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AnyFucker Mon 25-Feb-13 23:59:35

bloody hell, this is a great thread grin

TDada Mon 25-Feb-13 23:19:47

Come on my son!

donnasummer Mon 25-Feb-13 21:59:54

either my friend is greta garbo or she hasn't a clue who sent them either! I don't know how I am ever going to find out unless the mystery person reveals themselves!

GreenEyedGirlxxx Mon 25-Feb-13 21:49:31

We need an update OP!!!

ArtsMumma Tue 19-Feb-13 22:37:41

is anyone else dying for a happy (or night of passion) ending to this? do update OP it sounds so lovely! smile

donnasummer Sun 17-Feb-13 11:15:07

lol at you lot, you are more excited than I am - where's the fire?! cogito, if it was you, nice roses, you could always take them out of the cellophane for that extra special touch
and when you rip the price off, rip ALL of it off
I am seeing my friend on Friday so I may mention, in passing ....just to update you properly you understand grin

GreenEyedGirlxxx Sat 16-Feb-13 22:21:56

You have to sound your friend out and/or get his number. It's so exciting and if it is him who has sent them, this could turn into something really special. Strike while the iron's hot (and while the flowers are still alive!!)

PhieEl06 Sat 16-Feb-13 20:48:57

I have just read all of this, oh my it could be a book it's so very modernly romantic. Get his number & call him or at least sound your mutual friend out, ask if she's spoken to him recently just ask about him, I agree with previous posters I am excited for you!! Accept that things like this can happen & yes stop being a coward, when was the last time you had mystery flowers on valentines day?! Possibly if you meet up with your mutual friend in person & mention these flowers she may have that guilty smile on her face as she could of gave him your address for the flowers. Oh please please please follow this, it sounds so romantic!!

ProphetOfDoom Sat 16-Feb-13 20:31:10

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

kalidanger Sat 16-Feb-13 20:30:12

flowers on my doorstep yesterday and a card with a joke about snogging

Probably from Cogito attempting to encourage you to JUST BLOODY STALK OUT HIS NUMBER CALL HIM shock

ProphetOfDoom Sat 16-Feb-13 20:29:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

donnasummer Sat 16-Feb-13 20:12:24

well if it is, I'll give him top marks for effort and ingenuity! will def update

Jellykat Sat 16-Feb-13 19:55:20

Oooo ooo exciting! it's gotta be him surely.. especially as you've not played tonsil hockey with anyone else.. smile

< fingers massively crossed >

Will you keep us updated please? i'll need to know now!

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