Hello, this is my first post in a group although I have been reading loads of replies to other posts. I hope you ladies can help me too! It's a bit of a rant so I apologise in advance! :)
I am currently 13 weeks pregnant with my first child. I am 25 and my partner is 27 we both have stable jobs but we are not married and we currently live with my mum as we were saving for a mortgage.
This pregnancy was not exactly planned but after getting over the initial shock both my partner and myself are happy. So is my mum. The problem is with my friends and extended family. I have two friends that I have known since school, we have always been at about the same stage in life; worked together as teenagers, went to the same university, lived together and all became teachers. It now seems however that I have become the odd one out. One friend, I think is a bit sad that she has lost her drinking partner and is worried that she won't fit into my new life. The other friend seems to be jealous. (I'm not really sure why). Even though I kinda understand how they feel their lack of support has really upset me. For example not one of them asked me how my scan went until (unknown to me at the time) my partner who knew how upset I was messaged them on fb to ask them to call me.
I know that they have their own lives to get on with but I would like and really need their support right now. We have always been so close but at the moment I feel so alone.
Also over Christmas I told my god brother (who since losing his mum and dad in the same year has become like a brother). His response was "s£!t" and silence. He then decided that after I had spent the whole day cooking and he had done nothing, that it would be a good time to sit me down and tell me that he was very unhappy and couldn't see himself being happy any time soon. He suggested, more than once that I should have an abortion and when i made it clear that was not going to happen he said that it would probably take him 10 years to accept it and be happy. I was so stunned i was rendered speechless! However, I was so upset I sent him a message after Xmas telling him that his reaction was inappropriate and that he would not be welcome around me until he could accept my decision and if it took him 10 years that would be his problem, not mine.
Although I am not married and still live at home, my mum would be living alone and owns a 6 bedroom house and wants us to stay rather than rent somewhere. There is lots of room at home and by staying at home we will be able to afford our own property sooner. On the topic of marriage, I know my partner loves me and I would like to get married, it just hasn't happened yet. Do you think these are the reasons that some people are being so judgmental and nasty?
Why can't people just be happy and supportive of me? Do you think myself and my friends can rebuild our relationship or are things just going to be different from now on?
Any advice or kind words would be much appreciated.
Thanks
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Feeling down about negative reactions to my pregnancy!
18 replies
Lonelymama2b · 28/12/2012 17:39
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