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need advice. new to this

(10 Posts)
logitech56 Thu 13-Dec-12 18:49:10

I'm not sure if i am being supersensitive, or not. Me and much younger man, get on really well, started as a ONS, been out a few times, he stayed over for a weekend, had a fabulous time etc.. I dont actually want anything long term, just fun. Or so I thought.
In a couple of months time, there is a work do and I jokingly spoke about taking him along as my date as he would look amazing in his dress uniform and it would cause lots of gossip. He seems quite keen and has mentioned it a few times, and I've been going along with it. Taking him to this would actually be quite a big deal for me, so I thought maybe I should see what he is like with his friends. He had sort of mentioned something with a friend in another city this weekend, and at first I turned him down flat, but then thought that if i go along then I would see what he was like when he isnt with me. We have no friends in common and I've only ever met him when its just been the two of us. He has just texted to say that his friend whose place he will be staying the night hasn't got room for two of us on his sofa, but he will be along to see me on the sunday as per the original plan.
I'm feeling a bit rejected and taken for granted/a ride. Am I being oversensitive? or should I happily have him over the next day?
advice appreciated

FloralWellies Thu 13-Dec-12 18:52:28

I don't think the issue of the weekend away is a problem, it's just a logistics thing about nowhere for you to sleep; he is coming round the next day.
More to the point, are you ready for all the speculation at the works do when you bring along a fit young man in uniform?!!
Enjoy it, he sounds nice!

sarahseashell Thu 13-Dec-12 18:53:54

sounds like you're both maybe unsure about introducing one another to friends at this stage, maybe given the age gap and also because it's a new relationship which is fairly casual?

On that basis I'd just enjoy it for what it is and take it as it comes. Yes have him over Sunday if you want to, if not don't. Simple as that. Don't invest too much of yourself in it and don't worry about the work thing until much nearer the time, would be my advice.

Just go out with friends or do something nice Saturday instead?

logitech56 Thu 13-Dec-12 18:55:05

exactly.. I'm not sure. Thats why I thought I would see what it was like socialising with him with more people..

He is lovely. I couldnt have made him better if I had imagined him up. smile

So I should still see him this weekend? and have him over?

dondon33 Thu 13-Dec-12 19:04:14

Maybe if he really wanted you to meet his friends at this point (I'm not saying he doesn't btw but may feel he's not ready) then logistics shouldn't come into it. He could rent a B&B or you could both sleep on the floor.
Not enough room sounds a little like an excuse to me.
I personally wouldn't mind if he wasn't ready for the big intro's yet but would rather he didn't lie about it.
It's not reason to stress about it though nor reason to not have him over as you had planned this weekend, see how it goes in the future, obviously if there's more 'no space' excuses given then you have a problem.

logitech56 Fri 14-Dec-12 09:32:40

thank you.
I havent replied to his text yet, the one with the no space message. Will do so after work today. something simple like a smiley face.

akaemmafrost Fri 14-Dec-12 12:01:09

What's the age gap? <<nosy>> grin

I was with someone much younger earlier this year. Not together now but I really struggled tbh, really liked him but worried about it ALL THE TIME. He introduced me to his friends etc though. It was distance (he was nearly 200 miles away) that ended it really.

logitech56 Sat 15-Dec-12 14:09:09

more than a decade. I wrote the actual number down, but then felt like a paedophile. :O He looks and acts older than he is, and I've been told i look a lot lot younger than I actually am.

akaemmafrost Sat 15-Dec-12 17:03:21

Well mine was 12 years, but I also look a lot younger than I am. How are you feeling about things today?

logitech56 Sat 15-Dec-12 21:19:02

17 in my case :O

I caught myself thinking he would like some cheese as a christmas present today when i was in town doing my christmas shopping. Obviously I didnt act on the thought, I'd just seen one of those market type places selling cheeses.

keep it casual is the mantra going through my head, even though I'm really looking forward to seeing him having sex tomorrow.

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