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Reluctantly namechanging...(thanks, snoopy DP)

(24 Posts)
phoebus Tue 27-Nov-12 23:13:47

Nosey DP has just pointed out to me that he can (and probably now has!) read any post I've ever made just by typing in my username (which he found out by sneakily reading it over my shoulder) into Mumsnet or Google - I'd have thought he'd have better things to do angry...! A salutary reminder to me, anyway, that all posts made are actually in the public domain....So (as I enjoy my privacy and anonymity) I'm reluctantly now going to change my username permanently. Will still be around, though!

DP will NEVER, NEVER guess my new username! grin

HotDAMNlifeisgood Tue 27-Nov-12 23:16:28

Is he truly a "D" P?

Leverette Tue 27-Nov-12 23:20:16

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Leverette Tue 27-Nov-12 23:23:24

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

AnyFuckingDude Tue 27-Nov-12 23:32:13

Is he always a nosy bastard ?

Valpollicella Tue 27-Nov-12 23:37:39

What a fine species he is by reminding you he can check up on your business (yes I know mn is on the internet and totally acvesible. It just takes a 'special' kind of man to remind his dp he is stalking them in this wsy)

OP. Wish you luck under your nc and in rl

TalkativeJim Tue 27-Nov-12 23:50:35

Keep the username and change the 'D' P?

What a twat.

RoxyRobin Wed 28-Nov-12 00:05:20

Well, at least he told you. He could have kept schtum and gone on reading your posts ad infinitum ...

NewNames Wed 28-Nov-12 00:17:25


Meh. I'd read DPs posts on here if I spotted his username!

NewNames Wed 28-Nov-12 00:17:42

Leave, obvs!

As if no one else would

Apocalypto Wed 28-Nov-12 12:44:47

Snooping in a relationship is fine surely.

The advice is frequently given here to read his texts and emails - which are between him and one other person - if you think he may be having an affair. It is even added that he should be happy to prove himself innocent, even though he, or at least the other party to those, has a reasonable expectation of privacy, but the end justifies the means.

Shoe, meet the other foot.

You can't reasonably expect that everybody but him should get to read your MN posts. If you are venting about him online to strangers, that would be something he ought to know, right? It goes to your perception of him, and his reciprocal perception of you.

If you've nothing to hide you've nothing to fear.

ledkr Wed 28-Nov-12 12:47:33

CAnt imagine dh would be interested tbh he thinks the Internet is for checking footy scores

OneMoreChap Wed 28-Nov-12 13:01:43

Is he always a nosy bastard ?

cf. "What, he won't let you see his email/FB/forums? He's a cheating bastard! LTB!"

"Why doesn't he want you to see his phone! LTB"

Yep, you can be searched for:
3rd link I think

AnyFuckingDude Wed 28-Nov-12 14:07:18

omc...the op hasn't said if there are any concerns about cheating in this relationship

he is simply being nosy about what she is posting online

if my husband made a point of using my specific username to search everything I had ever posted on here behind my back, I would be furious

wouldn't you ?

and what is your purpose in trying to catch me out ? Every situation is different. You surely wouldn't want to see a party line delivered to everyone regardless of circumstances, would you ?

in other words, get off my back and post what you find helpful to the op

I see you neglected to do that though..quelle surprise

AllIWantForXmasIsJewels Wed 28-Nov-12 14:10:50

Meh. DH knows who I am on many forums, he's just not interested enough to catch up on who else I am boring my tinternet pearls of wisdom.

Nagoo Wed 28-Nov-12 14:17:58

DH knows my username.

I'd be more than a bit fucked off if he went to the trouble of 'checking up' on me though. Why would you do that? It's like hacking a FB account or reading my emails. Its more about what they think they will find by snooping than what they might actually find. Does he not trust you?

I would recommend NCing for very private stuff if you want to keep the same NN on here though. It's not just partners who can work out who you are, and yes, everything you post is searchable.

KittenCamile Wed 28-Nov-12 14:20:17

Did he say it in a sinister way or just as a joke? My DP would joke about something like that but wouldn't actually bother, he is far too lazy!

We should remember anyone can read what you post, I recognised my DP's EXW from a post on here, found out something I really didn't want to know and when I told her she freaked, liked I had read her diary! Hello public forum!

OneMoreChap Wed 28-Nov-12 14:21:46

Sorry AFD, you were just the one I quoted.
(And what are you on about "behind my back". Did you miss the bit in the OP
DP has just pointed out to me that he can ... read any post I've ever made just by typing in my username ... into Mumsnet or Google

Could have been
Leverette Tue 27-Nov-12 23:20:16
Is he usually so disrespectful?

Valpollicella Tue 27-Nov-12 23:37:39
What a fine species he is by reminding you he can check up on your business

TalkativeJim Tue 27-Nov-12 23:50:35
What a twat.

I thought the advice was implicit in "Yep, you can be searched for:"
In other words, OP:

Grow up; he spotted a name and advised you of the risks of inadequately protecting your screen name.

Possibly a bit insensitive, but WTF are you so worried about?
BTW, dumb move in referring to your NC as that can be searched for too.

People have different privacy boundaries. DW can read any of my email she likes that isn't work. She can - and does - see all my none work texts [basically because I say "What's that that's pinged in?"]

She doesn't have my passwords for mail (although I have hers effectively as I admin the servers); she doesn't want to move to Webmail which I suggested.
neither of us has any interest in the others online activities...

Leverette Wed 28-Nov-12 14:27:34

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OneMoreChap Wed 28-Nov-12 14:37:34

Not that this sort of issue read email OR Facebook has ever been discussed before.

Course, he might have just wondered where the Wine pack came from, or how much you were talking about your DS with strangers or if you were saying anything about him...

OneMoreChap Wed 28-Nov-12 14:39:35

Link should be this one

Whocansay Wed 28-Nov-12 16:25:19

My dh knows my username. I know this as he sneaked it into conversation yesterday and gave me a pointed look. I couldn't give a monkeys tbh. There's nowt I'd write that I wouldn't say to him, even if we were having problems. I'd doubt he'd be interested for the most part.

And if dh is reading, stalk away babe, you naughty stalky man!

AlienRefluxLooksLikeSnow Wed 28-Nov-12 16:30:56

I'd be pissed off too, it shows a lack of trust doesn't it? And no, I wouldn't read my OH's text e-mail or anything on FB, which he always leaves open, I trust him, and he talks a load of football shit mostly anyway!!

Apocalypto Wed 28-Nov-12 16:54:18

Ah, but what if the football shit is a cunning code?

Hit the woodwork...Dropped the ball...Missed the free kick...

I suppose it wouldn't be hard to work out what "took a dive in the penalty area" meant...

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