A couple of years ago DP had a mental breakdown, we sought help, he took medication and things seemed to get a lot better. Sadly it is happening again, I can see the signs having been though it before, he is talking about ending all, saying things like "you would not want to spend 5 minutes in my head", drinking in secret and lying about it, not working properly, avoiding people. I just feel so exhausted by it. I know mental illness is a dreadful thing and I really feel for him but from a selfish point of view I feel so lonely and just responsible, if that makes any sense. One part of me wants him just to leave but then I think DS 12 will not forgive me. Sorry just wanted to vent really, don't want to tell anyone in RL as sure they will be totally fed up with it all.
Feel safe but dreading the thought of going through it all again. Last time MHT were here everyday, attended some counseling, on AD's. Unfortuntely some months ago he stopped taking them ans he thought himself better.
I've been in your DP's position - from my experience, what he needs a empathy and love PLUS a massive kick up the arse to seek professional help. I've tried to come off my meds before and my DP has had to sit me down and tell me straight - ' I love you, I will support you, but you are unwell and you need to go back on meds.' Perhaps he feels ashamed of being 'dependent' on meds - I know it took me a long time to accept.
That being said, there is no excuse for not taking responsibility for your mental health - just as, if he were diabetic, you'd have every reason to be angry with him for not taking insulin properly.
Try to get him back to the doctor ASAP - make sure he knows there's no shame in seeking help. And look after yourself, you are just as important.
knit Thanks for sharing. Trouble with MH issues is that in my experience a big part of it is denial. It took things to go to extreme levels last time, I had to call an ambulance because he OD's, lots of self harming. I forced his hand to seek help and when feeling better he was so happy I did. Even when sitting here talking to MH team he kept deflecting.When meds were sorted he was so much happier foolishly he felt he was cured. I just don't want things to get into that nightmare and bit angry he can be so blase. I feel alot stronger this time and will call help without hesitation and this time allow them to take him into hospital so I am not on suicide watch. I am going to make see GP again and start AD's asap