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Omg!!!! I've just found out

(164 Posts)
Stopthepidgeon Sat 17-Nov-12 16:15:18

Okay - so following on from my should I should I not track my cheating husband thread .....

He has taken our dc out to visit his parents - and left his computer open

I am dumbstruck to find out he has secret savings in excess of £1 million!!

This is not a stealth boast - I am in total shock

ThatVikRinA22 Sat 24-Nov-12 11:41:03

i think the fact that you are going the these levels of extreme snooping shows how much trust is left in this relationship.

id call it a day.

AnotherMumOnHere Sat 24-Nov-12 10:22:04

Going back to facebook. I have an 'exfriend' who doesnt show up on a search if you put in her name, but if you put in her email address then it does. Can you get her email address from your DH account and check that way?

chucksaway Fri 23-Nov-12 20:22:36

regarding facebook - the woman in question probably has a private setting which means she cant be searched for - however, if your husband knows a mutual friend of hers then he can look at this persons friend list and gain access to her facebook page that way. just because you have opted to be non-searchable on facebook doesnt mean you cant be seen in your friends' friend list - hope that makes sense - although it is possible to hide your friend list not everyone does this. but anyhow thats the most feasible explanation of that

ScarletWomanoftheVillage Thu 22-Nov-12 19:24:17

This all sounds to me as if he may be setting you up in some way.

Maybe the money is fake

Maybe the FB account is fake

Could he be trying to see if you are snooping? Is there some kind of history between you regarding this?

It just seems weird that he would leave all this stuff to be discovered....unless for some reason that's what he wants.

Could he be trying to cover up something else? and throw you off the scent?

Not sure what though...

LadyFlumpalot Wed 21-Nov-12 19:29:58

Argh. I work in a pension admin office for high net worth clients and I really, REALLY want to ask the OP to PM me her husbands name in case he has a pension with us.

But I won't, because that would be completely unethical, against the rules (and law) and just stupid.

Still really want to though.

OP - FT could well have made her Facebook completely private. I've turned mine private, to the point where I can't be searched for.

GhostShip Wed 21-Nov-12 19:25:06

clear history and cookies, but afterwards go on something innocent so it doesn't look cleared.

Stopthepidgeon Wed 21-Nov-12 19:23:38

I'm pretty sure I've covered my tracks - cleared history etc. but good point.

Apocalypto Wed 21-Nov-12 18:55:15

the mystery FB page could be a fake one containing the credentials for all his secret bank accounts.

in plain view is often a good place to hide things.

Brycie Wed 21-Nov-12 17:32:13

yes - cookies too I think.

HappySunflower Wed 21-Nov-12 17:30:21

Are you clearing your own internet searching history- using a password protected account? You need to stay one step ahead of him to avoid him finding out what you know/tracking down your Mumsnet posts. Off the beaten track might be a good place to post in the future so that your posts don't appear in active conversations...

I agree that it is time to consult a very well regarded solicitor.

It is possible that you are blocked from that particular person's Facebook account!

BlameItOnTheCuervHoHoHo Wed 21-Nov-12 17:24:02

Could it just be that she is unsearchable (I am) by non-friends.

Its all v strange.

Brycie Wed 21-Nov-12 17:21:10

He sounds cunning enough to surprise you with the fact that he knows just what your doing and is working the best way forward for him. I agree with everyone to see a lawyer and get it on the table.

Brycie Wed 21-Nov-12 17:18:42


Brycie Wed 21-Nov-12 17:18:24

I think it's the same woman and a fake TB page. Like safflower.

safflower Wed 21-Nov-12 17:14:09

i know nothing about facebook, expect that what I have heard it is nothing but trouble. BUT could FT be the OW under a different name? Could she have blocked you? or could your DH have gone on your facebook and blocked her so you cannot see?

Probably none of it.

<<<<<amateur sleuth>>>>>

Stopthepidgeon Wed 21-Nov-12 17:10:40

I know it's strange. When I search a profile on my own FB account it doesn't show up.

But when viewing husbands account (as I were him). It does on his.

Yes I know - I should stop playing PI and make a path to move on ....

JaxTellerIsMyFriend Wed 21-Nov-12 16:58:01

Get yourself to a good family lawyer and stop looking at facebook!

ClippedPhoenix Wed 21-Nov-12 16:56:09

I'm with Vicar on this OP. Stop it, you'll just drive yourself mad. Your time would be best served getting YOUR act together now.

GhostShip Wed 21-Nov-12 16:52:42

Thatbastard - does the OP not mean on the computer history? It would show on there

ThatBastardSanta Wed 21-Nov-12 16:29:13

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ThatVikRinA22 Wed 21-Nov-12 16:24:54

i think you need to stop playing PI and really collect your thoughts on what you would like to happen from here.

he is dishonest.

he has had an affair, is now talking to other women secretly on FB and has a million stashed which you knew nothing of.

if i were you, i would be seriously contemplating my options, because i would rather make the decision to end the relationship armed with the knowledge you now have than have it ended for me somewhere down the line when he has hidden that money and found himself another mug woman.

im sorry OP but your husband isnt an honest man, do you have any sort of idea what it is you want to come from all this snooping? are you thinking of leaving?

DragonMamma Wed 21-Nov-12 16:06:50

Very strange.

Does she have a common first name? I'd be tempted to.drop the name in to conversation for something unrelated and see his reaction to the name. Obviously it her name is Falula it may prove a bit more difficult.

Could she be an ex-Ow?

Stopthepidgeon Wed 21-Nov-12 15:49:57

... so basically My "DH" can view FTs FB account but no one else can ... Iyswim

Stopthepidgeon Wed 21-Nov-12 15:48:46

Update - more intrigue.

Ok - so he has popped out to collect DC from school and his computer is still on at his FB page.

Nothing untoward there - the last pm is one from me.

But. I've looked at his activity log on FB and historically he is searching the profile of another woman - lets call her FT. FT's FB account has been active since 2011 tho not much public on there from his view point.

I have never heard of FT.

Ex-OW has a different name.

I tried to search FT on my computer via my FB account and she didn't come up. I also searched using a fake FB account I made up because ex-ow has blocked me from Viewing her page but I can see her page from my fake account.

Am perplexed.

Not sure if any of the above actually makes sense - if you manage to follow this update then thankyou.

Longdistance Wed 21-Nov-12 05:36:52

stopthepigeon keep your cards close to your chest, and keep a poker face on at all times wink

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