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can't do this anymore....

(4 Posts)
burstingbaboon Sat 17-Nov-12 00:51:53

I know it's late but i just can't do this any more!!!
We are together more then 10yrs,have two beautiful,smart and loving dd's but he is just being so....don't even know the word to describe him.
I am working 3 full days and he is in process of looking for job. I know it has being very stresfull for him but i am earning decent wage so we can handle him being out of work for time being.
He is good father,we share care,household duties (cleaning,cooking,taking girls to activities..etc) but he can't handle the pressure and any type of conflict will end up him undermining me ,my job, my ability as a woman,mother.He will blast where i am coming from and everything i achieved since i came to UK 15yrs ago. I worked sooo hard by myself-i have never ever been without job. I don't even know what it means not to work.
I don't work on fridays,so after mass in the morning(dd had reading) we got into the argument about him going to reed-it had to do with a advisor. He met her only 3 times but he became so fixated with her that i thought i am dreaming . The way he talks about her (like he knows her so well and she is this,she is that...) so i dared to comment in the heat of conflict that he should know why he is seeing advisor and he should focus on that rather on her.
He punched me and dragged me across the kitchen to the sofa and kept punching me. He treatend to kill me and kept hiting me. Three weeks ago he twisted my thumb ,i still don't have full function.
I don't have friends because of him,i gained weight because of him, i feel worhless because of him...
Is this the same person i sheared dreams and future? Why i didn't see it coming?
Do you know what it means living within milions and be alone?
I am sorry for rumbling but i am just realising this is not who i am. Do you know all day i am waiting for him to fall asleep to post this? He separated me from world without me even realising-i don't have family near,no friends couse he was always jealous----not sure what i am asking!
Just need a worm familiar voice and i don't have anyone.....what is the point of everything?
I am just so tired and hurt and in pain

ll31 Sat 17-Nov-12 01:22:37

So sorry, look up womens aid on phone and ring when you can

izzyizin Sat 17-Nov-12 01:30:49

Contact Women's Aid here www.womensaid.org.uk

Get yourself to your GP or A&E, have your injuries documented, report him to the police, and get him out of your home and out of your life.

Please disabuse yourself of any notion that he is a 'good father'. Good fathers treat the mothers of their dc with respect. He's an appalling male role model for your dds and the sooner he's out of your home, the better.

burstingbaboon Sat 17-Nov-12 01:39:26

Thank you....i know i need to put myself together first.
I just need a friend tonight......

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