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6 months in...are these normalish and I am being too picky?

(146 Posts)
scrapingbottom Mon 12-Nov-12 18:50:41

Hello All,

I read here alot, have name changed for this as slightly scared of answers

I have been seeing someone for just over 6 months, and for me we hit crunch time this week and I'm thinking of leaving, just wanted others opinion if possible.

All been ok, been on 2 long holidays etc and see every weekend however a week ago my mum who lives a long way away said she would be over at end of Dec and wanted to meet him, so I asked him, he lives half an hour away and said o might be too tired as its a monday, i got the message and said ok fine will tell her you are too busy. However was annoyed and all the things I am unsure about have reared their ugly head...

1) He is incredibly tight, so much so that his friends take the mick, and hates going out

2) he eats at his parents every night so as to save cooking and prefers me round latish so he can eat first, his mum also does all his washing and ironing..he is 50

3) He farts now continually, didn't used to and thinks its hilarious

4) Like some kind of tourette syndrome he keeps saying fcuking c@@t under his breath apropos of nothing when we are out??

5) calls his boss female a slag and a c@@t and says she slept her way to top and wants him and i should be lucky he has morals??

6) A bit shorter than me and I'm average height and wears huge built up shoes so he can hardly walk, I hate this, I don't care about the height

7) obsessed with anal sex??? WTF

8) Slightly controlling and bossy and hates me drinking or looking at other guys, I don't realise I have looked till he makes a comment, I'm normally just looking into space I think

9) Ok just read these and they sound awful, he can be lovely, good company, and fun, but I'm getting irritated now hugely, yes been asked to meet his parents and I would never say o no too tired as its in week

Any ideas

stargirl1701 Mon 12-Nov-12 18:51:38


ChicMama25 Mon 12-Nov-12 18:51:56

Ahhh he sounds gross and horrid sorry! Get rid!

NatashaBee Mon 12-Nov-12 18:53:46

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AThingInYourLife Mon 12-Nov-12 18:53:54


FirstTimeForEverything Mon 12-Nov-12 18:53:59

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TurnipCake Mon 12-Nov-12 18:55:17

He sounds vile. One thing I learned from my exes is: the way in which some men disparage other women will eventually be how they disparage you.

scrapingbottom Mon 12-Nov-12 18:56:17

No not a joke, I have listed all things that get on my nerves so much, he has good qualities too.

But the money thing drives me mental, I earn a v good salary ( touch wood) and he things all women are after his, I hate this.

Thanks for answers, if I read I would say same, these are the bad things, he has many good, but I am getting irritaed after mum thing x

Wecanfixit Mon 12-Nov-12 18:56:55

Got to agree with the other 2 posts , get out while the going is good , ask yourself after reading what you have written does this sound like a nice guy you are seeing ? emm no , do yourself a favour and dump him you deserve so much better than this , good luck.

onedev Mon 12-Nov-12 18:57:34

Agree with others - he sounds horrible, definitely run!

lightrain Mon 12-Nov-12 18:58:29

Think there's a reason he still lives with his mum at 50. Not sounding great tbh.

higgle Mon 12-Nov-12 18:59:04

No amount of good things can make up for that list! No self respecting woman would put up with all that even if he was the last man left on the planet.

poocatcherchampion Mon 12-Nov-12 18:59:04

I thought it was going to say cuts toenails onto floor' of something actually bearable! [Grin]

overmydeadbody Mon 12-Nov-12 18:59:43

He sounds horrible.

If you're irritated after six months, and he is acting like this after six months, then it is time to call it a day.

Do you really see a future with a man like him? <shudder>

poocatcherchampion Mon 12-Nov-12 19:00:32

grin then, and once you've dumped him, cheer yourself up with a wine

Tressy Mon 12-Nov-12 19:00:37

Another thread that sound like it's describing another ex of mine. I dumped him 6 months in because of similar behaviour, right down to eating at his mums every night! He got married afterwards and had another baby. I bumped into him and he was moaning about it all.

Are you happy, do you love him? I think it's a good time to end things before you get more miserable.

lovemydogs Mon 12-Nov-12 19:00:50

Sorry but he does sound dreadful. Also personally, I really don't like the c word at all even when someone is angry. Probably best your mum does not meet him. If he was 20 and ate at his parents each night etc I could understand. Also I find meaness with money often comes with meaness in consideration and caring. I do wish you all the best.

TequilaMockinBird Mon 12-Nov-12 19:01:11

Run for the hills, he sounds a bit weird tbh

lemonstartree Mon 12-Nov-12 19:02:02

RUN. and do not look back !

scrapingbottom Mon 12-Nov-12 19:02:09

Thanks he lives round the corner from his mum. I know families are close, but when he boasted how low his utilities were I realised why, gives her something to do he said, the cooking I can understand if she does it anyway but the laundry I find hard.

Hes saved so much and has a house which is v nice but spotlessly tidy that you feel uncomfortable

When he comes round to mine he texts me after to say what bits he though dirty????

as far as I know he had one long term 3 year relationship at age 40 then all v v v short term ones

mrscynical Mon 12-Nov-12 19:03:11

Jeez, the first six months are supposed to be all wonderful and lovely and bloody brilliant. Imagine how awful it would all be six years down the line.

Any one of those points would have me dumping him.

He is a complete and utter twat.

ChicMama25 Mon 12-Nov-12 19:03:27

I could never ever ever not even for a single second entertain the idea of being with someone who spoke about women like that

MadameOvary Mon 12-Nov-12 19:04:51

I would say, OP, that any pleasant characteristics or appealing qualities would be pretty much obliterated by the list above.
He is a manchild.
Unless you enjoy being surrogate Mummy and a sounding board for his dodgy views of women, run like the fucking wind

Ephiny Mon 12-Nov-12 19:07:29

Are you serious?

No, you are not being too picky.

Is this a joke? confused

SweetSeraphim Mon 12-Nov-12 19:07:42

He texts you to tell you which bits of your house is dirty? Fucking hell, why are you even seeing him? He sounds dreadful.

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