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Divorcing on grounds of unreasonable behaviour.

(8 Posts)
Nomorepain Sun 11-Nov-12 16:06:10


To keeps costs as low as possible I have been asked by my solicitor to produce a list if 8 examples of ex unreasonable behaviour. I am struggling to keep them concise because it is all so bad! Can anyone provide any examples? How wordy can they be? I am worried that I won't give full picture if I don't include the detail

CogitoErgoSometimes Sun 11-Nov-12 16:35:38

This isn't an official list or anything but I would have thought any of the following.
- Violence, bullying or aggressive behaviour towards you, the children, family or friends
- Financial abuse - withholding/controlling money, gambling problem, racking up debts, stealing
- Sexual abuse - coercion, perversions, third-parties, rejection of a physical relationship
- Accusatory behaviour - lying, spreading rumours, criticism, complaints, emotional damage
- Criminal activity
- Work-shy, lazy around the home, not contributing with children.
- Dangerous/irresponsible behaviour that causes you to be anxious or at risk

Nomorepain Sun 11-Nov-12 16:38:07

Fi you just list one if those as a title or go into detail as to what he did? I am struggling!!

TheSilverPussycat Sun 11-Nov-12 16:42:03

Regardless of cost you would have to do this, the solicitor will rewrite them into a more formal form. Each only needs to be a couple of sentences long. Write it all down in a ramble, then edit down.

Here's one of mine: The Respondent refuses to discuss issues with the Petitioner and there is never a right time to have a discussion.

The courts are not in the business of apportioning blame, nor keeping people married when one or both doesn't want to be. But I did include reasons which I knew I would be arguing on when it came to the financial settlement.

CogitoErgoSometimes Sun 11-Nov-12 16:46:24

I think you'd need a sentence or two about each one. Let's say you're saddled with a dead-beat .... your sentences could be 'Unreasonably lazy....has had three jobs in the last two years, walked out on two of them after just 1 week claiming that the managers 'had it in for him' and didn't turn up for the last one because he 'couldn't be bothered'. This has caused the family excessive financial hardship.'

Anniegetyourgun Sun 11-Nov-12 16:47:44

You can actually have anything at all as an example of unreasonable behaviour, provided it is unreasonable from your point of view. I covered two sides of A4 in small handwriting with grievances, which my solicitor helped to pare down to half a dozen telling examples. These included stuff like us not having a family holiday for years and years, and not having a social life together, as it showed that the relationship had irretrievably broken down. You'll need dates and examples where possible, the more recent the better, to demonstrate that the behaviour is ongoing.

MOSagain Sun 11-Nov-12 16:51:38

You need a sentence or two on each allegation of unreasonable behaviour and approximate dates. The last one has to be fairly recent, ie within the last 6 months.

Ideally, the draft petition will go to him/his solicitor if he has instructed one for consideration prior to being issued. This sometimes helps avoid a case where a respondent might want to defend proceedings if there is on particular allegation that causes offence and it can sometimes be agreed to delete or amend prior to issue of proceedings.

Nomorepain Sun 11-Nov-12 18:52:30

Thanks for the advice. I've managed to write enough I think. Makes for pretty grim reading though!! Just going to type it out and send off!! I am havin to do this in case e won't sign adultery confession. Had it for 2 1/2 months already so not holding out much hope!

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