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I don't know what to do, I cannot cope with all of this

(187 Posts)
SantasStrapOn Sun 11-Nov-12 01:51:33

S'me Stratters. I cba to name change and you'd all guess it was me anyway.

I have nobody but my DDs. No family. My family are v v toxic and I was the scapegoat. No friends. I cant bring myself to trust anyone enough. Apart from the DDs, and people like the dentist, my GP, the only people I 'talk' to are my XPILs and my XH. I don't leave the house, I am terrified of everyone and everything, and I have no trust. This time last year I wasn't quite so bad, but it's steadily got worse and worse.

ATOS, in their wisdom, decided that I was perfectly ok. They lied and said that I went on my own (I didn't), and put the opposite of what I said down. I was interviewed by a physiotherapist FGS. I appealed and was told I wouldn't get a tribunal for 18 months. That was in March.

I filled in the paperwork. Made it very clear that it was impossible for me to represent myself, told them i had noone who could attend for me, told them the real version of what happened in my interview. Told my GP what had happened. Went to see my old Psychiatrist, who I've seen on and off since having DD2. I'm having fortnightly counselling but have only just started. I know I need to sort this out, but it's so hard without any support. I have nobody to ask to represent me, and nobody has offered to.

I planned to get a letter from my psychiatrist and counsellor, and send it as supporting evidence. I spoke to the DWP, who said it was clearly a mistake and not to worry.

Today I got a letter from the tribunal service in Peterborough. The appeal was held on the 9th. I had no forewarning that it was going to take place then. Nobody told me.

My appeal has failed. I have no fucking idea what to do next, and I can't cope with even thinking about it. I have never felt so alone and helpless.

Hassled Thu 13-Dec-12 22:05:49

Stratters - this whole thread had passed me by and I had no idea you were going through such hideous shit. I'm very sorry - you just have to find whatever it takes to keep fighting the good fight.

I worked out that ATOS were fuckers when they ruled that a fomer colleague with bowel cancer was fit for work. They really are the lowest of the low.

Selks Thu 13-Dec-12 21:49:22

Oh lord, really sorry to hear that. I hope CAB will be of use tomorrow sad angry

TheLightPassenger Thu 13-Dec-12 21:06:05

sorry about the judge stratters.

CashmereHoodlum Thu 13-Dec-12 18:07:25

Sorry to hear that. Hope things will be more positive after speaking to the CAB.

snowqueenrollo Thu 13-Dec-12 16:14:54

I'm sorry to hear that sarah sad Hopefully the CAB specialist will be able to give some reassurance and a plan of action to move forward with this.

SarahStratton Thu 13-Dec-12 15:56:45

The judge has ruled that he will not overturn the tribunal's decisioned. Got to ring the CAB specialist tomorrow, but it's really shit.

SantasStrapOn Sat 01-Dec-12 23:13:15

Not crochet sperm, she's branched out, so to speak. Now she's got a proper crochet hook (thank you so much woollyback), she's going great guns, and the sitting room is covered in purple crochet squares. grin

ParsingFancy Sat 01-Dec-12 22:10:36

Sorry, should have said, that's if you end up going for another ATOS interview, not for the appeal panel.

DD's making more crochet sperm? shock

ParsingFancy Sat 01-Dec-12 22:05:26

Stratters, little known fact: you can tell ATOS to record the interview and give you one of the tapes. Just request it in the "any other info" box at the end of the long bloody form.

They don't publicise this, and often try to wheedle out of it. If they do refuse, tell Benefits and Work who are trying to compile statistics about ATOS's behaviour.

It's so common to include bits clearly from other people's assessments I think it's actually a software bug. And that's before their outright lies.

Good luck.

Flyagaric Sat 01-Dec-12 21:42:57

Oh I am so glad to read the positive update! Excellent that you have got CAB behind you now and they feel that there is a good chance of things getting sorted out.

Don't know what the situation is re your DD but sounds good about the home tutoring, and lovely that she received some fab wool and a hook grin

SantasStrapOn Fri 30-Nov-12 17:14:49

I know. I felt happy today. Plus a lovely, lovely Mumsnetter sent DD2 a proper crochet hook to use, and 2 balls of gorgeous wool.


School rang. They are arranging home tutoring for her, to tide her over until she's completely well.

queenrollo Fri 30-Nov-12 10:38:18

I was thinking about you yesterday and wondering how you got on. So pleased that you have someone fighting your side now who knows how to stick it to them smile

SantasStrapOn Thu 29-Nov-12 21:14:36

Thanks Mme.

Saw the CAB specialist today. She confirmed what a lot of you have said, that they have contravened rules by not informing me of the tribunal date, and depriving me of my right to give additional information, etc.

She's writing to them to get the decision overturned. And she's going to help me sort everything out. I feel so much better.

MmeLinDude Thu 29-Nov-12 10:55:25

I missed this, but can see that you have been given excellent advice, so I will just add my best wishes and send you all lots of delicious <virtual choc>

amillionyears Mon 19-Nov-12 22:13:17

Fair enough.

SantasStrapOn Mon 19-Nov-12 21:39:18

Thank you cc. Can I just say that cc's PM was very helpful, and very thought provoking, and I really appreciate her taking the time to PM me with a response.

ccarpenton Mon 19-Nov-12 20:48:06

"SantasStrapOn, I possibly wouldnt take much notice of ccarp. He/she popped up in the middle of another thread in relationships, with a lot less than helpful advice to the op on that thread."

It's "she". I think I know the other thread to which you are referring, because it was the only one where I wasn't trying to help. That woman was being a martyr. SantasStrapOn is not.

Got your PM S.S.O. and have responded - all the best.

Claire X

SantasStrapOn Sun 18-Nov-12 16:22:38

That was supposed to be a smile

SantasStrapOn Sun 18-Nov-12 16:22:06

Thank amillion, I did PM them, but didn't get a response. That helps a lot, I've been worrying about what they meant, and appreciate your post ;)

amillionyears Sun 18-Nov-12 15:55:00

SantasStrapOn, I possibly wouldnt take much notice of ccarp. He/she popped up in the middle of another thread in relationships, with a lot less than helpful advice to the op on that thread.

Sunnywithachanceofshowers Sat 17-Nov-12 23:38:41

Hello lovely Stratters

Glad things are moving on and you're feeling a bit better smile


SantasStrapOn Sat 17-Nov-12 23:25:17

Thanks everyone.

What do you mean ccarp? What is missing?

ccarpenton Sat 17-Nov-12 22:06:11

Hopefully your Psychiatrist will be able to help. The information in your original post wasn't nearly as shocking as what was glaringly missing.

Listen very carefully to your Psychiatrist and be open to their suggestions. Try to ask him/her what you can be doing to improve your situation.

Please, please listen.

Selks Sat 17-Nov-12 19:07:10

agh - GAIN

Selks Sat 17-Nov-12 19:06:52

Hi Stratters, how're you doing?

I saw this link and thought of you. I can't fathom the detail but possibly it may be of some help - how to gaqin exemption from Atos decisions

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