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How does you partner make your life better?

(70 Posts)
Bubblenut Sat 10-Nov-12 15:35:16

Partner/ husband/ wife - how do they make your life better than before you were with them?

Examples please if possible!

Bimblepops Sat 10-Nov-12 23:30:12

He bugs me
He doesn't answer the phone/reply to texts during the day
He leaves his clothes everywhere
He works hard at a job that bores him
He loves me
He loves our beautiful boys
He's funny and makes us all laugh
He is kind, loving, caring, supportive, fierce (when needed)
He's clever
He holds me when I weep
He's my other half, my sounding board
He's my comedy partner for our two kids
I love him, he makes me happy

SooFrustrated Sat 10-Nov-12 23:44:09

He takes out the bins & cuts the grass. That's all really. sad

R2PeePoo Sun 11-Nov-12 00:06:18

We are on the same page with most things and when we disagree we can discuss it without shouting.
He thinks I am the sexiest woman in the world (even though the mirror tells me otherwise) and tells me frequently.
He listens to me
He supports me totally and encourages me to be who I am
He is an involved and loving father
When I was ill he took two weeks off work and took care of me and the DCs without complaining once
He doesn't ever tell me what to do, he treats me like an adult and an equal even when I am not behaving like an adult
He stroked my leg and told me I could stay up as long as I liked tonight to write and potter as he will get up with the DCs tomorrow.
He gets on very well with my mother
He tells me he loves me a million times a day.
He is incredibly clever, dedicated and ambitious
I don't think he has ever said anything critical of me in 11 years.
He doesn't care about the state of the house, having meals on the table when he gets home or having clean clothes. If something needs doing he will just do it. My happiness is paramount to him as his is to me.
We bounce off each other a lot with ideas and jokes, our sense of humour is very similar.
He considers himself to be a feminist

Gelsa Sun 11-Nov-12 00:26:39

R2peePoo you are very lucky. am so happy for

R2PeePoo Sun 11-Nov-12 00:49:06

Gelsa, it makes me so sad that you think I'm lucky. Everyone deserves to have a partner who treats them like an equal and someone special.

I read what you said about your life. You deserve better than that and your children deserve a happy mother.

My mother was unhappy, we all knew it. My dad wouldn't change and there was no love, no affection, lots of arguing and coldness. I remember sobbing when I left for university because I was leaving my brother in that situation alone. When I met DH at 19 I knew he could offer me everything I didn't see in adult relationships growing up and I grabbed at it.

My mum left my dad at the age of 52. She is now married to someone else, so is he. They are both so much happier. All the tension is gone when I think of them now, but I am still rebuilding my relationship with them.

I wish so much that you could have a nurturing and loving relationship, you sound so resigned to being unhappy. But you really don't have to be, especially not for the sake of the children, who, I am sure, would really rather prefer that you were happy.

VBisme Sun 11-Nov-12 01:06:51

He understands me, like no-one else, and loves me for exactly who I am.
He's a wonderful dad, and makes me very proud.
He's not afraid to take a risk, and encourages me to do the same.
He adores me, and would do anything for me, I know that 100% (and I would do the same for him).

dublindee Sun 11-Nov-12 01:14:05

I see him and I get little butterflies.

When we are out and about with friends, family or kids and we get to share a smile or look its as if time is slowing down for that moment so I can feel it with every fibre of my being that I'm loved.

He lives me wholly and unconditionally.

He encourages me to follow my dreams but is happy with me as I am warts (not literally wink) and all.

He's not just my husband, he's my soulmate and my best friend.

We NEVER take each other for granted.

dublindee Sun 11-Nov-12 01:15:13

Not lives me - loves me ... Silly iPhone!

Giglet Sun 11-Nov-12 01:17:49

I am only completely relaxed with my husband. He accepts me, warts and all, and loves me despite my many many flaws.

He accepted the responsibility of my teenage son and has supported him emotionally and financially through university.

I have the peace in a relationship with a man who doesn't use abuse, violence
and infidelity to control me. (unlike my xh)

I am at peace and know I am truly very fortunate.

forehead Sun 11-Nov-12 17:36:03

He is the kindest person i have ever met.
He is a fantastic father and is really involved in the dc's lives.
He makes it obvious that he loves me, respects me and will do anything to make me happy.
He is very clever, but very modest,
He finds me extremely funny.
He is a fantastic role model for my son.
He is the only person who can put up with me.
He tells me how clever i am and how he is lucky to have me.
However, i feel that i am the lucky one.

AlwaysReadyForABlether Sun 11-Nov-12 20:34:13

Having recently split up with H, this thread has made me cry. But it has also reinforced my view that I did the right thing by ending it as I didn't have any of the things you ladies have described. I can only hope that the person who will make me feel like that is out there somewhere.

Arthurfowlersallotment Sun 11-Nov-12 20:38:27

He loves me, I love him.
He takes the edge off life's harshness.

drjohnsonscat Thu 29-Nov-12 13:53:02

Bit late to this but just had to say that this thread made me cry a little bit. Your lovely men smile.

I don't have a DP. But I'm ok with that. Sadder for the ladies who are with someone who isn't lovely.

pictish Thu 29-Nov-12 13:59:07

He thinks I'm talented and could achieve anything I set my mind to.
He pampers me when I have a self inflicted hangover.
Even after 15 years we can still chat long into the night.
He takes equal respinsibility for looking after the kids and stuff that needs doing around the house. We are as lazy as one another. wink
He never tells lies. It's brilliant being married to someone whose word you can trust.

There are loads of things I could write, but those are first that occur to me.

keely79 Thu 29-Nov-12 14:11:38

He cherishes me. I feel safe when I am with him and I know that I and DS and DD are the centre of his world. When he looks at me, the love in his eyes sometimes takes my breath away.

He isn't fond of the big romantic gesture, but every day does things for me which make me know that I am loved.

He shrugs it off when I am being hormonal and unreasonable.

He gives the best hugs and will cook for me at the end of a long working day for the both of us.

He is roasting in bed - so I always have somewhere warm to put my feet. He will let me squeeze his blackheads if I want to pick at something.

He is going to get up at 5.30 in the morning tomorrow to drive myself and my sister to the airport as we are going to Copenhagen for a girlie weekend.

He makes me happy.

blackcurrants Thu 29-Nov-12 15:18:56

He makes me laugh. We laugh about the silliest, inanest things, I can't even give you an example of it because it would be too stupid, but it makes me feel happy, cheered up, and that someone really 'gets' me.

He's extremely patient when I'm tired, moody, upset (36 weeks pg here and liable to fly off the handle) - and extremely supportive when I just say "I need to stop, sorry. Going to lie down." - takes over everything in the house, toddler DS, you name it.

He's a real grafter - works so hard at his job, at home, and is passionate about the things he works on (education, technology). I respect that so much, it's inspirational.

He's a lovely, lovely Dad. Wouldn't have wanted to have kids with anyone else. Seeing him and DS building things together, or wrestling, or just watching him deal with one more tantrum through gritted teeth.... I feel like I have a real partner.

He's a great cook and the sex is awesome. He takes the bins out, makes DS's packed lunches, and buys me lovely, thoughtful birthday, Christmas, and anniversary presents.

He's gorgeous and I love looking at him.

Frankly, just hearing his key in the lock makes me grin. The main thing he's added to my life is happiness and a sense of abundance. I was pretty happy when single but I am SO happy with him, I sort of feel like pinching myself. 8 years into it all!

FeuDeSnowyRussie Thu 29-Nov-12 16:13:23

He cuddles and strokes me all the time and gives me all the affection I want, and more.

He's incredibly kind and thoughtful, to everyone, not just me.

He's very intelligent and reads very widely, so we can have great conversations, and even though we think differently on loads of issues he will always consider another point of view.

He is always thinking of things I'd like to do, see, watch on TV etc, rather than things for himself, and he'll do them with me even if he's not remotely interested.

He taught me that friends are just as important as your relationship and that you should always make the time and effort to see them and keep in touch.

He's very sexy and whenever I see him naked I want to jump on him

TwoStrongArms Thu 29-Nov-12 16:20:34

Bubblenut - I hear you.

I read these posts with such gladness that people get so much from their partners, and it makes me realise just how mine is a non-relationship.

I want to be able to write a post like some of these.

And I suppose thinking that it might actually be possible one day instead of sitting it out is a positive feeling.

arequipa Thu 29-Nov-12 17:10:35

someone to talk to about my day and hear about his... a great dad...his work pays the mortgage (mine only pays a few bills).... up to now a kind and good person who I don't love but am financially dependent on- who is just beginning to turn angry and bitter as I repeatedly talk about separation. I'm scared because he always used to be the one whose judgement I trusted but now there's no anchor.

BartimaeusNeedsMoreSleep Thu 29-Nov-12 17:27:37

He really cares about me, my happiness, how my day was. He listens to me.

This morning I said I need more help cos he's been working loads recently and despite me working FT too i realised that morning, evening and weekend I do everything for DS. He straight away did DS' breakfast and is coming home early tonight to do bathtime.

Its the little things that I love.

That and the fact that we laugh loads together.

BartimaeusNeedsMoreSleep Thu 29-Nov-12 17:29:19

And I dont have to pretend with him. I am me and he loves me

IvanaHumpalot Thu 29-Nov-12 18:41:42

Brings me a cup of tea every morning.

arequipa Fri 30-Nov-12 00:22:12

He makes life better because I can live in a nice place, be with my son every day, manage to pay bills, do creative work I love doing, enjoy the garden, watch comedies and have a chat with someone amiable.

He makes life worse because I don't love him any more, I'm always looking at other men, I feel trapped, terribly depressed at times, rather dead inside whenever I am with him. When we part I will miss DS half the week and miss the nice home. I will not miss the DH.

DizzyPurple Fri 30-Nov-12 00:39:32

It's good to read the positives here. Mostly i feel quite positive about dh however we've just had a big row so struggling to think of many right now!

DizzyPurple Fri 30-Nov-12 00:44:13

It's good to read the positives here. Mostly i feel quite positive about dh however we've just had a big row so struggling to think of many right now!

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