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nightmare in-laws

(5 Posts)
mummymafia Thu 08-Nov-12 21:39:00

Any tips on evil in laws, mainly MIL, who send vile emails, leave awful voicemails & have a very twisted view on reality. I won't bore you with all the details but MIL is an alcoholic FIL is spineless, we hardly see them very often. Our 2 DSs barely ask about them. The obvious answer is just ignore them & get on with our lives but DH is struggling with depression at the moment, I'm struggling with his depression & keeping everything going & don't need this sort of shite. I have pointed this out to them to no avail. I have done everything I can to ensure my DSs know them but I've had enough now. angry .

HissyByName Thu 08-Nov-12 21:42:40

Cut them out, you can't heal when exposed to this. They are exacerbating your respective illnesses.

Change your numbers, emails, and call 101, get advice from CAB about non mol orders.

NamingOfParts Thu 08-Nov-12 22:04:08

For many reasons I grew up without regular contact with any of my GPs - it really isnt the end of the world.

If they dont add to your lives then you can work on the practicality of cutting contact:

- change your email address, I had to do this a few months ago when I started getting invaded with viruses. It was really easy and quickly bedded in. You will need to check the old email from time to time but delete all the in-laws ones without opening them.

- If you are having problems with voice messages on your land line then I know that BT have services which can help. Perhaps other providers do as well. If the problems are on mobile then can you discuss changing number with your service provider

The difficult thing will be making the decision to cut contact. The practicality is less of a problem.

mummymafia Thu 08-Nov-12 22:10:20

Yes I think we have decided to cut contact AGAIN, we let them know 8 years ago when DS1 arrived after 3 years of no contact at all. MIL is currently preparing a letter for me documenting the reasons I have left them out of their GSs lives. I was the one who let them know they had a GS & have done all the contact since. Mmm, like that is going to help anyone. I shan't read it & shall return it unopened. Just gets you down as to why be like this? DH is their only child as well! So our DSs are their only GCs. sad

forgetmenots Thu 08-Nov-12 22:40:15

I am so sorry you are going through this.

No contact has to mean no contact. No letting them know anything, no answering phones, no Christmas cards. If they come to the door, dont answer it. Change phone numbers. Filter emails. We are trying this at the moment and it is so, so incredibly hard but the only stab we have at a happy and peaceful life (LO due in June). It is quiet most of the time with big eruptions of toxic behaviour every so often. But that's better than the craziness we were living with every day, and now we just don't engage, it feels actually kinder on everyone.

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