How long before you feel comfortable talking about 'anal' and such?

[BurntPasta]

Been together about 3 and a half months. Known each other since April.
Started sleeping together two weeks into it. We have grown very close and done loads together other than sex obviously, we go out a lot and spend loads of time together. Especially lately as he's been sleeping at my house half the week.
Anyway - we've not broached the subject of anal but on a number of occasions, especially these past few weeks his hands have wandered around there but he's stopped short, once he was really drunk and went a little further than usual but I stopped him.

We've talked about loads of stuff, real personal stuff but we both seem too shy to actually bring this up!! Is that normal for just 3 months in?

[SoleSource]

Yes

[ISeeThreadPeople]

Personally, I'd be comfortable talking anal after about 75yrs.

Or after 75 minutes if the conversation went along the lines of "cold day in hell..."

Is it something you're wanting to do? It'll come up in time I'd imagine.

[BobblyGussets]

@ ISeeThreadPeople "It'll come up in time I'd imagine".


It won't be for me

[vodkaanddietirnbru]

nothings getting near my bumhole either!

[MamaMary]

Not for me thanks

[kilmuir]

Never, exit only.
But depends how you fell, what you enjoy and are comfortable with

[kilmuir]

Feel not fell

[TomsBentPinky]

You've only be shagging 2 weeks?

Why not enjoy regular sex a while and get to know each others likes/dislikes before potting the brown??

[monkeyfacegrace]

Yes its normal, why are you worrying? Do it if you want to, dont if you dont.

I hate anal, but thats just me.

except when Im really really drunk, then I beg DH for it

[BurntPasta]

No we've been shagging for about 3 months - two weeks into the relationship is what I meant lol

[TomsBentPinky]

Ha Monkey, twice in my life I've been drunk and twice I've done the same?! Jeesh.

[fluffyraggies]

No she's been with him 3 and a half months and started sleeping with him 2 weeks in.

I think if you want to discuss it then go for it OP. There's no rule book y'know :)

[BobblyGussets]

Oh Tom, I've not heard that in ages, I'm trying not to chortle at "potting the brown" as DS (9yrs) will ask me what I am laughing at.

But yes, OP, get to know him first before meeting Captain Pugwash.

[NettleTea]

well of course unless you 'fell' like those unfortunates who turn up in A&E!!

Not my thing either, tho according to rumour tis all the rage now as a normal part of the variety. I must be getting old. (I am.....)

[TomsBentPinky]

Ah right, its all upto you isn't it.

[fluffyraggies]

X posts. Do you want to then OP? And are too shy to tell him? Or too shy to tell him 'forget it buster'.

[BadgersGhostlyRetreatWoo]

if it's something you like and want him to do then tell him - he'd probably be delighted

if you aren't interested then tell him so next time his hands wander...

[Mintyy]

I feel sad that "discussing anal" is something that is felt to be inevitable in younger people today. It is all the result of porn you know. I have never "discussed anal" in my life, when I was more sexually active in my 20s and early 30s men simply didn't expect it as some holy grail of sexual experience. But that was before the internet and porn on the internet.

[MadameJosephine]

My DP has broached the subject a couple of times with me, my reply is always the same - 'OK, your turn first though'

[MamaMary]

I agree with Mintyy. It's a direct result of internet porn that you feel the need to discuss it and your bf probably feels the need to try it. It's ubiquitous in porn.

[akaemmafrost]

I hate that the arse is now expected .

It's not supposed to go there! It just isn't! Is nothing to be left unviolated in the name of keeping up with the sexual times?

Its NOT enjoyable and it hurts. Let's put sometime up YOUR arse Mr I Expect Anal Because Porn Tells Me You Love It!

[akaemmafrost]

Cross post mamamary.

[MamaMary]

I actually feel as angry as you, akaemmafrost but wasn't brave enough to show it.

[SoleSource]

Gay msn, how do you suppose tbey have sex? I never wstched/ read porn when I first invited my partner to try anal. Porn has not always been available and it may not be to your tastes but it is to others. It does not hurt me and is enjoyable.

[BurntPasta]

I've done it before with past partners but current boyfriend has a rather large willy so at the very least, I'd want to discuss it before doing it iyswim? it's not something you just 'do' whilst shagging in the traditional manner is it? I mean, christ I've only ever given him one blowjob and tried two positions - I don't think we're quite there yet lol