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Gone off sex.

(7 Posts)
Longo Wed 24-Oct-12 12:22:08

DP and I have been together for nearly 6 years. It was a whirlwind romance, he literally swept me off my feet! I got pregnant after 6 months and we had DD! Who we both adore.
Basically since I got pregnant dp has not really wanted to have sex, I thought it would get better but it's just got worse and worse.
5 months ago we decided to try for a second baby, I though great, lots of sex, no.
We have had sex twice sad
I know there is more to a relationship than sex but I really miss it and the intimacy.
I guess I'm looking for advice or reassurance?

CogitoErgoSometimes Wed 24-Oct-12 12:30:06

Have you spoken to him about it? Are you intimate as a couple in other ways besides sex? Might he not be as enthusiastic about a second child as you think?

Longo Wed 24-Oct-12 12:35:10

I have tried to talk to him, he says he is tired.
We are not overly intimate, I try but the constant rejection has done nothing for my confidence.

CogitoErgoSometimes Wed 24-Oct-12 12:38:19

So you wouldn't cuddle on the sofa or hold hands in the street, that kind of thing?

Longo Wed 24-Oct-12 12:39:30

No sad

CogitoErgoSometimes Wed 24-Oct-12 12:47:42

Assuming you're in your thirties or late twenties, I think this is potentially a serious problem. Plenty of couples find that new parenthood makes finding time & energy for sex difficult so get by with other ways to show affection like cuddling on the sofa etc. When there is not only no sex and no affection either, then it's pretty bleak. If you rule out medical problems (assuming no ED, for example) then the reasons why someone would keep rejecting their partner & opt out of a physical relationship completely start to look fairly depressing. If you tend to be the one initiating and getting rejected, what happens if you leave him be?

I think you need to have a much more serious chat where 'I'm tired' is not an acceptable response. You may not like what you hear but, until you find out the real problem, you can't hope to resolve it.

ClippedPhoenix Wed 24-Oct-12 13:01:30

Oh dear, seems like the whirlwind side has definitely come to a halt.

For me personally if i totally go of sex to that extent, i've gone off the person.

You really need to have a heart to heart with him OP.

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