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An ENORMOUS thank you to you all

(10 Posts)
wibblybits Tue 16-Oct-12 09:02:10

Good morning,

I posted this thread in August. Reading it back it's incredible how desperate I was and how totally miserable. I hadn't told anyone how I was feeling and I posted here out of pure loneliness, fully expecting to be ignored. I wasn't and that in itself made a huge difference to me. I stoped feeling like a freak and that took the shame away from actually trying to do something about it.

I took scarlet's advice and booked to see a psychosexual counsellor, and Jenner and mumsy's advice too, by arranging to see a gynaecologist who equipped me with some dilators and gave me some excercises to do.

The counsellor helped me enormously and I cannot reccomend seeing one enough if you're having any kind of similar problems. I told her about the birth, which was horrendous, which I couldn't get out of my head. We talked and talked until it was normal and it wasn't the only thing I could see whenever I thought about anything intimate. The dilators showed me that the problem was psychological, and not physical as I'd feared.

Anyhoo I'm banging on. The point is that in the past fortnight DH and I have had sex - twice!!!!!! This isn't something I ever thought I'd be saying again! I can do it, and it's great. There's still some pain, but fuck me there would be after all that. But I can do it, and I want to do it, and it's just amazing that I'm at this stage so soon after posting that desperate message.

People on MN make a huge difference to people like me. I'm a regular, here most days under a different name, pissing about on various threads and watching bunfights. It can look to outsiders like a bunch of silly, funny women being arses online. And a lot of the time it is. But when you really need someone, when you really need people to listen, and offer support, and help you, it's an incredible place to be.

So thank you so much. I know my problem was small-fry in comparison with much of what is posted on this board but for me, it was taking over every aspect of my life. I'm sending flowers to my surgeon etc. I can't do that for all of you, so I just wanted to tell you what a difference you've made.

Thanks thanks

I had no involvement in your original thread but this is so lovely smile glad you're so much happier

Iheartpasties Tue 16-Oct-12 09:12:59

yes - mn can certainly come through trumps sometimes, fab isnt it?!

bumhead Tue 16-Oct-12 09:17:31

I'm pretty new here so wasn't around for your original thread but wanted to say WELL DONE on your progress!
Glad everything is working out and you're enjoying everything you couldn't before.

SwimmingLikeADuck Tue 16-Oct-12 09:44:28

Great news op- well done! And yes, I love that I found MN too.

lemontruffles Tue 16-Oct-12 09:49:48

Another one not involved in your original thread, but, like you, I was given some amazing support and advice last year (under previous nn) when I became aware of a heartbreakingly sad problem that one of my children had been covering up for many years. The support I got gave me the guidance to seek necessary psychological help for her, and her life, and mine, has been transformed.

Mumsnet can be truly brilliant!

Fab news for you and your DH grin

skyebluezombie Tue 16-Oct-12 21:17:33

great news. MN is a fantastic place for help and support, no matter what the problem is xx

BinksToEnlightenment Tue 16-Oct-12 22:28:58

Mumsnet can be the most wonderful place can't it?

So glad you're feeling better. I spent a very long time after my labour feeling that I would never be normal again, but I am finally - so I can relate to this a lot.

Hope it continues getting better and better x

flatbellyfellaInablackcape Wed 17-Oct-12 20:33:39

That's great news,MN is a life saver to many's good to hear how things have worked out for you, Best wishes for the years ahead.

Shakey1500 Wed 17-Oct-12 20:42:47

Blimey! I've just read your original OP and that could have been me!

Ventouse delivery, tear (4th), stitches, infection, restitching, EXTREME pain, dilators, fentons, the "BUZZING" yes, I really understarnd that, the no wearing tampons, hitting the roof during a smear, and finally ability to have sex (though mine was 2 years all in all). I had to check your username to double check I hadn't written in my sleep or something grin

Glad all is well smile

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