Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Have you ever asked anyone out?

(100 Posts)
ParsleyTheLioness Mon 08-Oct-12 20:43:10

I am told that women do this nowadays! Don't know if I would get over the rejection if the answer was no. Am I just being sexist? Or just old...

OhEmGee24 Mon 08-Oct-12 20:44:22

No way!

ParsleyTheLioness Mon 08-Oct-12 20:45:06

Ok. For the reasons I have, or others...

eslteacher Mon 08-Oct-12 20:47:46

Yes, but only after enough flirting and pointed comments from him about how nice a certain pub in the area was, that I was 100% sure that a) he wanted me to ask him out and b) I wouldn't be rejected!

TBH if I thought there was any chance of rejection I probably wouldn't be able to bring myself to do it.

BillyBollyBandy Mon 08-Oct-12 20:47:59

Yes i have. He said yes but it didn't end well, I think he thought as I had asked I was keen and read that as he could be a cocky twat.

Or maybe he was just a cocky twat.

Ohhhhh just remembered I asked a lad out when I was a teenager and that ended very well wink

suebfg Mon 08-Oct-12 20:49:08

Yes, and I married him over 12 years ago.

BillyBollyBandy Mon 08-Oct-12 20:49:12

And I asked my ex for his phone number and called him to arrange a date. I get about a bit don't I.

DH asked me though smile

hatesponge Mon 08-Oct-12 20:50:47

I have - not in a completely direct 'will you go out with me' way to a total stranger, but I have suggested drinks etc to male friends/acquaintances I was interested in (and where I hoped there was some mutual attraction). I have been entirely unsuccessful but I'm not sure that would put me off in future.

And don't be put off by my failings, I have RIDICULOUSLY bad luck when it comes to men and therefore my negative experience is unlikely to be representative smile

OhEmGee24 Mon 08-Oct-12 20:51:27

Well I've never been in a position where I've liked someone and it's just been one sided so never faced the decision of "Should I, Shouldn't I". But I doubt I would.

xEmilyJx Mon 08-Oct-12 20:52:47

I have. We were on a night out and I knew he was interested so I just asked him.

Still together 4 and a half years on smile

ParsleyTheLioness Mon 08-Oct-12 20:53:44

Billy I worry about that too! Sue why did he not ask you. Was he just shy? Ha, sponge!

ParsleyTheLioness Mon 08-Oct-12 20:54:32

xEmily was yours shy too?

purpleroses Mon 08-Oct-12 20:56:36

Nah, I've mostly chickend out for the same reasons as you. Better to flirt and see if he picks up on it. Though I did once resort to the schoolgirl type "can you get your mate to find out if X fancies me..." kind of behaviour blush

I think blokes would mostly say they'd be pleased if a woman asked them out, but most women like to feel that they were the one that the bloke was after rather than being the only one who asked him out, if that makes any sense.

xEmilyJx Mon 08-Oct-12 20:58:47

Parsley He was nervous as I am younger than him and he has said he didn't want to pressure or rush me into a relationship.

skyebluesapphire Mon 08-Oct-12 20:59:45

I asked STBXH out, but I was exceedingly drunk at the time, or else I would not have had the nerve. i really fancied him, but didnt think that he liked me....

I did ask another bloke once, as he flirted terribly with me, so I asked him outright if he fancied me and he said no, he was just having a laugh with me ....

MonsterBookOfTysons Mon 08-Oct-12 21:02:16

Yes, my Dh grin

ParsleyTheLioness Mon 08-Oct-12 21:03:32

River and Purple, that makes sense. I think some blokes do like to be asked out, but I have known some macho types who probably wouldn't. Not that I want one of those...

Annunziata Mon 08-Oct-12 21:04:23

No but it was me who told (now) DH, then boyfriend that I wanted us to have sex. His face was hilarious grin

ParsleyTheLioness Mon 08-Oct-12 21:05:40

monster and anyone else who is still with them. Please tell me why they didn't ask you first!

LaundryFairy Mon 08-Oct-12 21:06:15

Yes, many times (the last one being my husband of 16 years). I had some good male friends when I was a teenager and they encouraged me to be brave and ask guys out. According to my friends, men would always be grateful to have the pressure taken off them for once. And so I have asked lots of lovely men out over the years (although always someone I had met through work / uni / mutual friends etc.). Every one said yes to at least a nice drink or meal out, most didn't turn into relationships, but I'll forever be thankful that I asked DH out (and later asked him to marry me!)

ParsleyTheLioness Mon 08-Oct-12 21:09:09

Annun what sort of a face was it?!

stookiesackhouse Mon 08-Oct-12 21:12:28

Have not ever read The Rules?

Tisn't allowed grin

AnastasiaSteele Mon 08-Oct-12 21:13:38

Many times. In fact I've probably asked out more than I've asked out. I tend to get asked out by people I am not interested in, and have to ask out the people I am interested in.

My first boyfriend has to think about it. He put me out of my misery three days later, we went out for a whole month. Then I got the 'it's not you it's me' speech. Oh the pain of a teenage broken heart....

hatesponge Mon 08-Oct-12 21:13:47

Just remembered one (probably my only!) success smile

I met someone once on a night out and thought he was the most amazing man. I didn't know if he felt the same (didn't think it possible) but he was so great I literally couldn't bear to let him get away.

So at the end of the evening I pounced and kissed him blush

He later told me that he would NEVER have made the first move because he thought I was far too good to ever be interested in him. I thought the reverse.

It ended up being the best relationship I've ever had.

Purely on the basis of how lovely he was, I'd say it's worth the risk grin

Annunziata Mon 08-Oct-12 21:13:58

Well I was 15 and he was 16.

So partly OMG she said that? shock
YES she said that grin
OMG I'm going to have sex grin
SHIT I'm going to have sex shock hmm blush

All in one. It still makes me laugh.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: