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Can't get past the negative view of myself

(28 Posts)
duffybeatmetoit Fri 05-Oct-12 11:08:19

DH left me a few months ago. Apparently he'd known that he didn't want to be with me since before we'd married but felt pressured into going along with it although getting married had been his idea.

We have a much loved DD and he now lives several hours drive away. It kills me that his need to be away from me was so great that he was prepared to be a bit part in his daughter's life rather than stay.

I adored him and I thought we'd had had many wonderful times together (until recently when I knew he wasn't happy but thought it was down to his lack of work rather than me). All those memories have been destroyed and much as people tell me nice things about myself, I can't believe them.

OrangeImperialGoldBlether Sat 06-Oct-12 22:30:59

I would have no contact whatsoever with your ex MIL. If she suggests that you go to any family event, laugh and say "I don't think so." What a lucky thing that you don't have to see her any more.

Tell your ex H to email rather than phone. Don't speak to him on the phone, particularly if he is banging on about himself. If you find yourself on the phone to him, talk about your child. If he talks about himself, say, "Sorry, I'm not interested. Have to go now."

I, too, think it's likely there's someone else involved, but I don't think it makes any difference to the fact he's a complete fool and you're lucky to be apart from him.

You can get divorced online and it costs about £100 - it's great if there's no property or if there are no arguments about money.

duffybeatmetoit Sat 06-Oct-12 22:44:19

I have refused to attend one event that they were pushing hard for me to attend. DD went with them but still they wanted me there. God knows why.
Posted about the separation on FB and had ILs posting that they were always there for me. None of my friends commented or "liked" their messages - I think they all thought it was a bit of meaningless PR.

With property and a child I guess the £100 option isn't a possibility?

izzyizin Sat 06-Oct-12 22:57:08

Visit to source a solicitor who specialises in divorce and family law and who offers a free half an hour intital consultation to establish your entitlement with regard to division of joint assets in the event that you petition for divorce.

And then begin the process of a diy divorce online. It isn't rocket science and you can use the services of a mediator if you're unable to reach mutual agreement.

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