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Oral sex and hygiene! am I OTT?

(79 Posts)
MuckyRedSheet Mon 24-Sep-12 17:44:37

I'll only do oral sex after he's had a shower. As we've never been in a position where he's had a shower before sex (or we've had time to mess around after a shower) I've never given him oral.

He has however, done it to me.

Am I OTT in insisting on shower first?

maras2 Mon 24-Sep-12 17:53:01

Your mouth, your choice of what goes in it.smile

caramelsmadfuzzytail Mon 24-Sep-12 17:54:36

No cuz giving a man oral after a wee is bleurgh!

Also getting pubic hairs in your mouth is no fun and don't get me started on the yack of whatever may be lurking under things.

Notalone Mon 24-Sep-12 17:55:35

Depends on how long ago he had a wash. If he washes daily then YABABU because he will probably feel insulted that you think he is somehow dirty down there. If the roles were reversed and he wouldn't touch you until you had washed you might feel the same. If however he is part of the once a week brigade then YADNBU.

For the record when I was with my exdp I wouldn't go down on him after we had had sex and refused to swallow. A very individual choice I guess but with my new DP I am more than happy to go with the flow. Maybe cos my new DP washes himself after going to the toilet but I think mainly because I have realised that bodily fluids are not dirty or disgusting and because he loves it that I am not turned off by that which turns him on more iykwIm. Have you had a bad experience in the past which has put you off?

OhWesternWind Mon 24-Sep-12 17:55:47

Well, I guess it depends on his general level of hygiene. If he bathes regularly and is clean and unsmelly, I wouldn't insist on the shower, but if he's a bit of a soap dodger I'd go nowhere near it without him being hosed down first.

adrastea Mon 24-Sep-12 18:20:33

Yes, I think you are being a bit OTT. What are you worried about? Maybe different if you know smells or seems unclean there because you tried it once - but then if so, why would you be having sex with him?

scarlettsmummy2 Mon 24-Sep-12 18:22:14

I won't until after a shower.

ErikNorseman Mon 24-Sep-12 18:30:24

Does he know that? It seems a bit weird that you have never given him oral if it's something you want to do.

SpicyPear Mon 24-Sep-12 18:31:18

Your mouth, your choice!

eslteacher Mon 24-Sep-12 18:42:06

I think it has to be your choice and what you feel OK with. But that said, I'm not sure how unhygeinic its actually likely to be as long as he bathes and changes his pants daily! Its never really occurred to me to insist on a shower first.

chipsandmushypeas Mon 24-Sep-12 18:57:02

Hmm depends what he's been doing and how long it's been since a shower. For instance I don't think I would be keen after he has been at work all day, work willy= not sexy. If he showered in the morning and it was 3-4 pm I probably would

Notalone Mon 24-Sep-12 20:08:57

Work willy! Never thought of a sweaty willy as a work willy before but I quite like that grin

BertieBotts Mon 24-Sep-12 20:30:57

It's up to you - blokes seem to vary a lot in my experience. DP is very clean grin and always seems shower-fresh even when he hasn't showered that recently but some other blokes I have been with have had a noticeable smell - not a bad smell, just a willy smell - not that long after showering and they vary massively in how much smegma they produce too. I used to just dive in quickly with a baby wipe grin

I'm afraid i mega insulted DP the other day by demanding he and in these exact words wash that cock before it goes anywhere near my mouth because it stinks (that horrid willy/wee/whatever smell)
He .. i suppose quite rightly because i was a bit harsh blush scowled but he did go and wash.

I must point out this is after 7 years or thereabouts of ignoring it, trying not to gag when its shoved in my direction, and him thinking it does all the work in twenty seconds often always leaving me frustrated on the brink of murder and i think i just.. snapped sad

And he is generally a clean guy.. i guess they just don't think because its not like they can get their own face down there.. lets face it if they could...

stretch Mon 24-Sep-12 22:35:17

A quick wash never hurts either of you, I prefer to be a bit fresher. Of course, a squirt of minty lube could help, (love my tingle lube!) grin

akaemmafrost Mon 24-Sep-12 22:45:28

As long as he showers daily I'll go for it any time. Again, AS LONG AS HE SHOWERS DAILY! <<stern emoticon>>

DP showers regularly. Every day. I just don't think he knows.
Or maybe i was spoilt as my ex was circumcised and always smelt clean smile shame that was the only good thing about him lol

Opentooffers Mon 24-Sep-12 23:10:26

The benefits of having known someone who went beyond 'the norm' with hygiene - he washed after every loo trip and certainly before and after sex. Ah, if only all men would do this how much nicer things would be..

Well i wash three times a day (Ocd-ish) and i still don't get any action sad of the oral type that is lol

Maybe i should issue a blanket ban on it grin

Dryjuice25 Mon 24-Sep-12 23:42:07

Hate Oral sex....and did someone mention swallowing? Not for me.

Op, you're not alone .....i'd have him bleach it if i could... I hate bacteria and it doesn't help that i'm an OCD sufferer.

Debster7808 Sat 29-Sep-12 09:50:35

I used to have a problem with oral sex with my earlier partners, but luckily my OH is circumcised, which makes oral very nice. OMG, I'd not be all that keen if he weren't, even if he took a shower beforehand. With a circumcised penis there is no question as to hygiene, and I like the way it's more streamlined without all that extra skin in the way.

maytheoddsbeeverinyourfavour Sat 29-Sep-12 10:06:36

It's not ott if it's how you feel about it, your the one who's doing it is he disappointed you've never given him oral?

I would not demand it of DH and I think id be a bit insulted if he refused to give me oral sex because I hadn't just stepped out of the shower, but the discussion wouldn't really come up <fnar> because we'd both make sure we were clean before letting the other do it

PeshwariNaan Sat 29-Sep-12 10:07:01

Not at all. Nothing wrong with a quick wash - it's what I'd do for him!

susiedaisy Sat 29-Sep-12 10:22:33

If it had been 12 hours since he showered and he'd been working all day then shower first but if its only been a few hours since shower and we'd been chilling out watching tv then no problem!!

Debster7808 Sat 29-Sep-12 10:22:36

Talking of reciprocity, would any of you ask him to shave down there if you had done yourself?

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