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Is she really a friend?

(10 Posts)
xmasevebundle Sat 22-Sep-12 21:43:21

I known this girl for about 3 years.

We was friends then argued didnt talk.

I am 27w pregnant and shes the only one ive closed information about the father, my babys name etc.

She just seems to think its fun to be pregnant and i think shes very envious of me being pregnant(i dont know why).

Shes very two-faced to other people and im started to think is she doing the same with me?

We rarely talk and i think she has told a few people my DS name ive picked and even told my ex(not the father i was pregnant).

She copies everything, how i do my make up to my clothes. Moans about money and ask how i can afford stuff being pregnant, i say i save my money up, £3 here and £6 to build it up to treat myself.

I get a grant soon, which im buying a new pair of doc martens(walking everywhere when hes born, buses are to much money)she has a pair too and will say something to me saying oh can you afford them when your pregnant? Ive bought everything for DS and need to pay off the pram i bought and some nappies.

All she moans about is her boyfriend who is a idoit, going out and bands, 14 year olds fancy her bf and got really jealous when her ex got with her 'friend' who she didn't even like.

She has been there but think lifes one big joke i dont really want to friends with her anymore but dont know what to say?

I haven't seen her in ages nor do we talk but she goes on about my baby as her child(her being the dad, as the real one is absent)

Im really funny about people touching the baby, she smokes heavy and dont wash her hands a lot, thick in foundation type. She said i cant wait to hold him and take pictures( which no-one is expect family because i dont want my ex to see what he looks like).

I dont really talk to anyone, expect my mum and dad. I am starting a mums group on thursday, which i am looking forward too.

Any advice?

SirGOLDBoobs Sat 22-Sep-12 21:46:28

Jesus, how old is she?! Sounds like one of the tits I went to school with...

She's obviously highly insecure (hence the copying you) but I would let no one who smokes heavily near my newborn.

Offred Sat 22-Sep-12 21:48:35

If she isn't a good friend cut her loose gradually. Pregnancy can make you reassess your friendships.

preggofabulous Sat 22-Sep-12 21:50:54

Hey Xmas!

Personally I'd drop her. You don't need extra stress at the moment, and if you don't feel u can trust her regarding info about baby, then why bother?

Now you're going to be a mum you've had to grow up. Unfortunately your friends have not.

dequoisagitil Sat 22-Sep-12 21:50:55

If someone treats other friends like shit, don't expect special treatment yourself.

Hassled Sat 22-Sep-12 21:52:08

The bottom line is a) you don't actually like her that much and b) she makes you feel uncomfortable. And all that old age has taught me is that life is too short for that sort of a friendship. Do what you can to let the relationship die a death, and concentrate on making new friendships. The Mum's Group sounds like a really good idea.

xmasevebundle Sat 22-Sep-12 22:01:32

Believe it or not Shes 20.

She rung me after i posted this i ignored but then texted me asking whats up?

She is OK to talk to,but i regret telling her a few things.

Since being with my ex and now ive grown up loads. I cant be going to starbucks everyday sitting outside smoking.

I am trying to drop her but i feel awful, as she posts on my facebook saying i look nice.

I do a flick on my eyes shes done the SAME on her new pictures.

It makes it even worse as i only have one friend who dont really bother so im left alone.

Im looking forward to mums group, big snag is its a young one, Im 19 and one other girl is 19, few 18-17 all the rest are 16under. I dont have anything in common expect pregnancy with them. I wont mock it until i go!

Dryjuice25 Sat 22-Sep-12 22:05:28

Not judging here but just curious as to why won't you let the father see your baby?

I think you'd have to create some boundaries of what you'd expect when baby is born eg she might want to put pictures on facebook, smoking away from baby etc etc.

She sounds annoying and way too nosy for your liking. Only you can tell whether you can trust her enough to be your trusted friend and if not, it might be time to withhold personal/sensitive info from her

xmasevebundle Sat 22-Sep-12 22:18:11

Short,simple and sweet this will be.

Hes a complete twunt, told me to abort, called it a bastard, said its only one im having as id want them not this and has NOT helped or been here through it with me. Also his mums threats to me, one being. Ill stab the baby out your womb.

I think thats suitable reason?

I am not putting pictures up on my facebook because its only a copy and paste click away! I would be very angry if he got hold of a picture, he did of my scan and i dont no who gave it to him so i removed it from my facebook.

I will talk to her but less and less. Her phone has been cut off, she does nothing all week but when its 6pm and her boyfriend is home shes over there and with him 24/7 at the weekend.

She has no job nor does look for one, shes been swindling benefits for god nos how long and even brags about it. I feel ashamed to even go town with her.

Dryjuice25 Sun 23-Sep-12 20:46:02

Jesus, he sounds charming!!!
Good riddance to him. And his mum!!! Jeremy kyle would reject both of them!

I would cut her off to be honest. You will find positive influence ....not from her.

Good luck with baby

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