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dp keeps lying to me - just found out he's done it again and im furious...

(29 Posts)
juicychops Sat 18-Feb-12 22:08:41

long story short - dp and i live seperately (i live with ds and he lives with his parents but stays at mine some nights during the week when he's not seeing his kids)
He's got a lot of problems with money and lots of debt that he doesn't tell me about. He's always moody lately and i think he's depressed - he has lots of probs with work, his parents, his ex wife regarding the kids etc.

lies in the past he's told: said he's posted a birthday card i gave him to post but i found it in his bag 2 weeks later.
gets into debt with my blockbuster card when he's told me he's taken them back. Same with library books
little things like 'i didn't turn the thermostat up', 'i didn't put your glasses there' etc but its obvious he has.

all just little things but they really piss me off.

anyway, a month ago i gave dp a birthday card for one of his kids and an xmas card for the eldest as he was away for xmas so i ended up giving it to him late. both were in envelopes and sealed. both had a £10 note in. I asked him a few days later 'did you give xxx and xxx their cards?' and he said 'yes, a few days ago'.
This evening i found in dp's bag a red envelope ripped open and his eldest son's xmas card completely taken out of the envelope and shoved in his bag a bit screwed up. No money in it. Im assuming his son never got his card or the money. have no idea if the other son got his card and money either. Or any of the other cards i have given them over the last couple of years.

Its only a small thing but he's lied to my face and stolen from me and his kid/s. Im so angry. He's at his parents now until tomorrow night luckily as i don't want to even look at him now. Don't know how to do this. ive text his eldest and basically asked if he ever received his card. ive had no reply yet but i dont know him very well so prob wont get a response any time soon.

What shall i do? what would you do?

GossipMonger Sat 18-Feb-12 22:10:32

'He's got a lot of problems with money and lots of debt that he doesn't tell me about. He's always moody lately and i think he's depressed - he has lots of probs with work, his parents, his ex wife regarding the kids etc.'

Truthfully he does not sound like a great catch and i would hope that my self confidence would make me feel that i could do better soooooooo........I would dump him and move on.

AnnoyingOrange Sat 18-Feb-12 22:10:32

Seriously, I would bin him

Kayzr Sat 18-Feb-12 22:11:45

I wouldn't be with someone who has stolen from his children. It's awful

Lagerita Sat 18-Feb-12 22:11:51

Why are you with this person? I use the term lightly. He sounds awful.

Mutt Sat 18-Feb-12 22:17:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lueji Sat 18-Feb-12 22:17:36

I would dump him.

Mutt Sat 18-Feb-12 22:18:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LesserOfTwoWeevils Sat 18-Feb-12 22:20:22

That's just nasty. Lying, breaking promises repeatedly, and stealing from your own children!
Doesn't sound as though you like him very much, and no wonder.
Not surprised he has problems with this parents, ex, work and everybody else.
And now he's making you look bad as well as him.
What do you need this loser for?

Flanelle Sat 18-Feb-12 22:20:40

He sounds pretty ghastly.

izzyizin Sat 18-Feb-12 22:28:19

How on earth do you justify giving this twat the title of 'dp'?

Do you seriously believe that this lying lowdown piece scumbag is the answer to your prayers?

Dump him and put a cosmic order in for an honest man who will love and cherish you and treat you with respect.

toddlerama Sat 18-Feb-12 22:35:06

Why on earth are you in this relationship? confused

tropamo Sat 18-Feb-12 22:36:55

Sorry OP but he seems unworthy of your attention - dump him! (I know that this sounds harsh!)

TheOriginalNutcracker Sat 18-Feb-12 22:38:53

His kids know about you know then ??? It is you isn't it who was supposed to be invisible ?? Please correct me if i am wrong.

He is a twat, get rid

LilacWaltz Sat 18-Feb-12 22:39:41

But was it his money to start with? Do you share money? In confused!

izzyizin Sat 18-Feb-12 22:43:50

There are some men who aren't fit to lick your manolos boots, juicy, and the oxygen thief you refer to as your 'dp' happens to be one of them.

Wise up, get shot, and make a good life for yourself and your dc.

lydiamama Sat 18-Feb-12 22:46:44

He does not sound good at all. I would put it down to an absent mind, and then shame to tell you he forgot, so he lied, but he took the money out (stole it!!!!) so no excuse here.

LilacWaltz Sat 18-Feb-12 22:47:43

Oh god.... Just read some of your old threads..... Deary me!!

Onesunnymorningin2012 Sat 18-Feb-12 22:51:27

OP, he sounds like an arse. My exH used to steal from me.

One of the many reasons he's my EX. Bin the bastard.

BayPolar Sun 19-Feb-12 05:02:30

You're still with him.
You probably deserve each other.

Lizzabadger Sun 19-Feb-12 07:05:48

What's STOPPING you from binning him?

WinkyWinkola Sun 19-Feb-12 07:36:34

He sounds like he has real problems. Pathological liar and kleptomaniac!

He won't change but you can dump him.

Get rid of him because he will keep doing this to you.

smearedinfood Sun 19-Feb-12 07:44:12

Do you think he has a gambling addiction?

FeedZombieEatSmartie Sun 19-Feb-12 07:44:23

I'm with everyone else - he doesn't sound like much of a catch.

If this is one of a long list of his negatives, I'd be getting rid. Sorry to be so blunt.

Abitwobblynow Mon 20-Feb-12 16:17:49

He lives with his parents rather than you.

Why do you think that is?

Are you wishing and hoping he will change? If you are, why would he change for you? Rather than, his wife, the mother of his children, his mother, his children...

You CANNOT control another person and make them who you wish them to be. You can only control yourself and make yourself who you wish yourself to be (and that takes hard work).

There is someone around here who is blinding themselves to the issues and I don't think it is him.

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