My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Daughter upset about half sibling

5 replies

tranquilitygardens · 20/10/2011 23:12

DD is getting upset about not being able to see half sibling due very soon.

Dad is a dick head and not in contact, he did make a point of ensuring I knew about this baby being born.

I enquired about contact and as there is no history of contact with the new baby, and no contact with Dad, dd as a child can't ask a court to have contact with half sibling.

Dad's family are further dickheads and are too lazy and selfish to bother with dd.

It doesn't help that someone dd knows has had a half sibling born very recently, it is to the Mum they live with though.

What do people do in this sort of situation, when they know they have a half sibling out there and will never know even what sex the half sibling is?

OP posts:
Report
Kayano · 20/10/2011 23:19

Well I actually have a full sibling who I have never met. My bio mum kept her and gave me me up for adoption (nice)

I so think about her/ what she looks like etc but I was raised knowing the full truth and there was little chance of meeting her and to be honest you just get used to it. It's not a big deal to me now.

Maybe not the most helpful advise but if there is no chance of contact the best you can do is be honest and not let your ex play mind games in front of her or dangle her half sibling as some sort of
Metaphorical carrot iyswim?

Managing expectation would e a good place to start

Report
tranquilitygardens · 20/10/2011 23:28

She knows that I have looked into the possibility for her having contact and that it is not likely. I did that a long time ago actually, long before I learned of this pregnancy.

She says she has no interest in seeing the dickhead, although I have been told when children are rejected and hurt like mine have been, they often respond like that.

I am sorry that happened, did you ever find out the reasons?

I don't think he is dangling the baby as a carrot at all, he has not seen the kids in years now, and said he never wants to see them again, thankfully as he is such a liar I spent nearly a thousand pounds I would have rathered spent on other things, to get a transcript of that as he said it in court (not what he tells his mates etc...)

Thanks for sharing your experience, I knew someone would have been in her situation. I have no idea what it would be like as my parents didn't have any more children after their divorce. My Dad, his friends and family also to be fair, didn't behave like a dickhead towards my Mum or us after my parents split.

OP posts:
Report
tranquilitygardens · 21/10/2011 14:03

bump?

OP posts:
Report
cookcleanerchaufferetc · 21/10/2011 20:02

Could you approach the mum and ask if your dd can see her half sibling?

Report
tranquilitygardens · 21/10/2011 20:36

No, she was party to the breakdown of the marriage, and caused a lot of problems post seperation, the dickhead was not one to put the kids first and she very much in agreement that their relationship came before anything else, and before the children, she was very happy to gloat to the children about this when they were forced to spend time in her company.

My exh is abusive, wife number 2 was on a pedastool back then.

DD would just like to see her half sibling.

OP posts:
Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.