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Why the secrecy?

(26 Posts)
leafyglenda Mon 17-Oct-11 13:18:50

DH has blocked access to social network sites he uses, why do he need to have secret chats, and what should i do to compensate? Am not on sites and don't want to be. It's really getting me down, all this separate life stuff.

shshiney Mon 17-Oct-11 13:21:25

Message withdrawn

leafyglenda Mon 17-Oct-11 13:29:37

I might as well ask the kettle. Previous things like this always go unanswered.

wicketkeeper Mon 17-Oct-11 13:37:09

Why don't you want to join in? There's nothing particularly secret about the likes of Facebook - join, make him a Facebook friend, and then they won't be secret chats any more.

leafyglenda Mon 17-Oct-11 13:38:45

Not sure, any better ideas......

izzywhizzysfritenite Mon 17-Oct-11 13:40:19

If you can't beat them, join them. If you want to know what your DH is up to on social networking sites it seems that you'll have no choice but to participate and find out for yourself.

leafyglenda Mon 17-Oct-11 13:40:42

Why should I have to be doing that, joining. What about what he is doing

leafyglenda Mon 17-Oct-11 13:42:02

Thanks for your meessages, got to go for now

bubblegumpop Mon 17-Oct-11 13:42:57

What do you want people to suggest? You aren't making any sense. You either want fb or not. Im on it, my husband isn't. He is not allowed, due to his job.

You think he is hiding stuff? If so talk to him.

AnyPhantomFucker Mon 17-Oct-11 13:45:04

what sites are you talking about ?

I don't share MN with my partner, for example

My Facebook has a password, they all do but he can see what is on my wall, as he is my friend

You will need to elaborate a bit more and also tell us a bit more about what you consider to be the diffence between privacy and secrecy

Everybody is entitled to privacy

Secrecy, on the other hand, tends to imply something to hide

sweepitundertherug Mon 17-Oct-11 13:46:39

If he is hiding it, then he has something to hide.

If you are not on FB/twiter/other sicla sites, I know you can set security settings on them so any old Joe Bloggs can't see them.

Has his behaviour in general changed? Do you have reason to be suspicious?

catsrus Mon 17-Oct-11 13:47:02

you're on a social networking site now, MN is social networking!! - do you plan to show him this thread?

Everyone is allowed some privacy - do you open each others letters?

All he is doing is talking to people online, just like you are - nothing wrong with that, tbh if he is having an affair, or starting an inappropriate relationship, he doesn't need social networking to do it! My exH met the OW on a f2f course, basically he was in the mood for a new relationship - if you think your H is going that route he will find ways to meet someone. You really need to talk to him about your fears.

leafyglenda Mon 17-Oct-11 13:53:50

Tks for the advice/comments, one site was blocked after i mentioned he talking to ex.

leafyglenda Mon 17-Oct-11 13:56:17

Also like to say, are people really voicing concerns/asking questions on the sites you mention, or 'chatting', ie, I've been to a concert.... not 'my man doesn't lve me... what should I do'....

AnyPhantomFucker Mon 17-Oct-11 13:59:32

what do you mean "blocked" ?

do you mean passworded or made not accessible at all ?

which sites are you talking about ?

am close to giving up here...

leafyglenda Mon 17-Oct-11 14:01:33

APF - your skills are needed elsewhere...

loopylou6 Mon 17-Oct-11 14:06:01

WTF? confused

TechnoViking Mon 17-Oct-11 14:11:41

OP you really need to clarify what you're talking about. Your posts are too short, with no detail.

AbbyAbsinthe Mon 17-Oct-11 14:17:03

Right, what's occurring? Are you blocked from places he's on, or does he just not stay logged in? confused

bubblegumpop Mon 17-Oct-11 14:39:44

The reason, you aren't getting many responses to your posts, is simple.

You aren't talking any sense. Talking in cryptic clues, is so 80's. After many kids, I don't have the will power to decipher them and I'm only 30.

So, sit down, write down your issue, exactly what is the problem, and elaborate.

Hey presto, you'll have answers.

shshiney Mon 17-Oct-11 14:41:46

Message withdrawn

ShriekingLisa Mon 17-Oct-11 14:45:26

when you say blocked how do you mean??

ShriekingLisa Mon 17-Oct-11 14:46:13

if you mean he has put a restriction your home pc so that social networks cant be used then he cant use them either! hmm so its not secrecy!

ask him!

AnyPhantomFucker Mon 17-Oct-11 15:47:43


ScarahStratton Mon 17-Oct-11 16:18:31

I think she might mean he's blocked her on FB?

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