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(9 Posts)
tstar Fri 14-Oct-11 14:33:09

Okay, I'm not sure how this will sound I dont want to be bombarded with nasty stuff.
I have been with my partner for 13 years, ENGAJED FOR 6, we have 2 awsome most beautiful, healthy children, life is great.
We are not married, not by not wanting to be, but by $$$
We work hard but $$$ is hard.
We have hardley no relationship at the moment, besides being mum and dad that's it.
We dont have alot of family to help but are suprised by the family we have not offering on an ocasional weekend, once a month... once every 2nd month, it all seems too hard. His family are too old and my family work and have alot of emotional issues. Oh my god. 1 friend offered for $15 an hour another has offered but I feel too rude to accept, as it seems like such a big deal.
When do you go out, who has your kids?

Kayano Fri 14-Oct-11 14:45:00

Have you asked the family you do have? Or are you waiting for them to offer?

OneNerveAndYouAreOnIt Fri 14-Oct-11 14:50:04

you dont need to spend money, just wait till the kids are asleep and take time for each other

CaptainNancy Fri 14-Oct-11 14:54:20

why go out? Unless your DC are teens, then can't you spend time with your partner once children are in bed?

tstar Fri 14-Oct-11 15:01:13

Good point, I know we should find time when kids are asleep, we seem to be just as tired as they are!
I have asked as for once a month time, it seemed difficult and never happened, I have hinted "I can't remenber the last time we went out together or boo hoo hoo our relationship isnt working"
We will just have to do what we do or don't do. I just wanted to here some sugestions or similarities."ta xx

jolouise Fri 14-Oct-11 15:01:47

A friend of mine did a babysitting club where they would find other couples needing babysitters and take turns.

It is hard and we were in the same situation when we lived near family. You see grandparents out with their grandchildren and think "why aren't my kids grandparents like that?"

Getting the kids in bed is good too and makes a huge difference.

If your friend is trustworthy I'd take up the offer and try to make it up to them in other ways if you cannot afford to pay them (meals, baked goods, shared shopping trips, etc).

tstar Fri 14-Oct-11 15:04:03


tstar Fri 14-Oct-11 15:08:15

Cheers jolouise, I apprisiate your comment as I feel so selfish. I have the moment of why don't they want to take them to the movies or maybe let them stay over, I feel selfish for wondering yet I realise they have ther own lives. I may just have to take up this offer of our friend. Thanx for sharing!

jolouise Fri 14-Oct-11 22:33:48

You're welcome and good luck!

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