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Getting over a toxic friend

(16 Posts)
atosilis Sun 02-Oct-11 17:58:20

I have mentioned this friend on another thread but I can still cry, 2 years later. I want her to know how much she hurt me but I have to suck it up and get over it. She is teflon.

atosilis Sun 02-Oct-11 18:09:47

The last straw was me paying for 2 concert tickets and a lux hotel room. I then paid for 2 lux tickets, accommodation, taxis at another festival. She owes me at least $£800 .

Finally rang me to ask for money for a taxi

total c+nt emoticon

Fluffycloudland77 Sun 02-Oct-11 18:11:00

Oh she will get whats coming to her one day.

My toxic ex friend ended up having alcohol, cocaine ishoos and having a threesome with her dp and random female friend.

Her toxic friend (their very common by the looks of it) told everyone about it and she got suspended for the coke and booze part of it.

And she aint a size 8 no more either.

I'm not actually that smug about it either. But she was a bitch to me, and about me.

Flubule Sun 02-Oct-11 18:12:54

I was just today thinking about having junk mail sent to the address of my toxic ex friend.

(Sorry not helpful, it is horrible to have been 'got' by one of their poisonous tentacles.)

atosilis Sun 02-Oct-11 18:14:45

But she won't get what's coming. She is bloody teflon. I have been in trouble and she just walked away, not her problem. I am going to write down all the stuff she has done, publish it and get film rights :-)

Fluffycloudland77 Sun 02-Oct-11 18:21:50

Success is the best revenge, I have everything she wants, honestly I thought my extf (ex toxic friend) would end up married etc but is still shagging around doing drugs etc.

Do you still know her or have mutual aquaintances (sp)

Like the film and book idea though, you might find theres more to that remark than you realise you know!

atosilis Sun 02-Oct-11 18:29:47

No, deleted her from my life but she is still in MY HEAD. Dear God, get over it.

activate Sun 02-Oct-11 18:31:02

So it cost you $800 to realise that you are worth more

sounds like therapy money

move on

atosilis Sun 02-Oct-11 18:33:33

Yep, will actually start writing. 'The Devils wears Prada' started with a PA getting pissed off. Ooooh, casting sorted - Jodie Foster as the uberbitch, Crystal Tipps as me grin

atosilis Sun 02-Oct-11 18:58:34

"And she aint a size 8 no more either."

I actually think I might start writing. The only thing is that nobody would believe half the tales. They'd watch the film/ read the book and go "Yeah, right".

scribble, scribble

atosilis Sun 02-Oct-11 18:59:59

Sorry, I'll stop now, spleen sufficently vented.

ILoatheMickeyMouseClubhouse Sun 02-Oct-11 19:24:10

I totally understand how you feel; I have only recently dumped my very toxic friend, but unfortunately I had to ditch other friends in the process too as she got very very nasty towards me on a night out and when I told her not to ever contact me again, several sided with her.

Still, we are far better without these toxic nasty people in our lives. I always felt deflated and put-down when I saw her, everything she said had a sting in its tail and although I thought she was fundamentally a nice person with foot-in-gob actually she turned out to be very nasty. Her comments had been getting me down and actually I feel like a weight has been lifted now I no longer have to see her or have any contact with her.

Fluffycloudland77 Sun 02-Oct-11 19:28:41

You do get over it in the end, and it is a relief.

RufusTFirefly Sun 02-Oct-11 20:43:55

I cut off from a toxic friend last year. He'd become increasingly demanding, entitled, querulous and domineering towards me in the last couple of years. He's blind, and on the one hand bites people's heads off for offering the "wrong" help or advice as he wants to be independent (this is fine, no problem with it) but on the other will play the blind card to keep me skipping round him and dropping everything to do his bidding. (He can be very nasty if I can't or won't). Final straw was when I was put at risk of redundancy last year. I have bipolar so had to look after myself at a stressful time to avoid relapsing, not to mention get another job, (which I did in the end), so I asked him not to phone me for a while. Not only did he not do as I had asked, but he gave his mistress my phone number as she had a computer problem and she phoned me, and a couple of days later he rang me to say - without any preamble - that his wife couldn't get on to Amazon. That was the last straw. I think I have done more than enough for him over the years and for precious little thanks or reciprocal help. He can jog on.

We have mutual friends, another blind man and his wife and they are in complete agreement with me that he is draining and that I must look after myself and cut him off. I am so angry with him and have resisted all his attempts to worm his way back in. I can't stand his absurd emotional messes, his ungraciousness and his wretched misogyny. I'm well rid.

atosilis Sun 02-Oct-11 23:09:36

But how can you get it in their heads that they have HURT. I don't want to walk away in pain and they can't give a fuck.

atosilis Sun 02-Oct-11 23:11:14

Activate. Thanks, good point.

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