please talk some sense to me/emotional affair

[peachyicecream]

Met OM two years ago at a bad time in my marriage - no sex for 5 years, little companionship, exhausted after five DC etc. Have been to Relate - helpful and supportive and relationship with DH has improved (though obviously from what had become a very low base.) BUT despite everything, I still can't get OM out of my head. Feel a deep bond with him that I don't get with DH. He is married, committed to his children. I understand that. He does not live locally. We meet rarely, but have had wonderful sex twice, very loving and we are in constant e-mail contact. Sex with DH is infrequent and feels an act. Don't even know why I am posting except that I am probably admitting I want OM totally and don't know how to get him. Or, more practically, would like to know how to get an OM out of one's head...don't want the anti-affair condemnation (iknow I deserve it) but really want to know how to end the awful addiction to OM.

[Proudnscary]

Sigh.

'He's married and committed to his children'.

Please. Leave. Him. Alone.

It is new and exciting and the first fuck you've had for five years so, duh, of course you think you are madly in love. it's fantasy- but one that could wreck childrens' lives.

[buzzskillington]

If you want to end it, you have to go no contact. Delete and block his number/email. If you keep in touch of course you're going to keep feeling the way you do.

Of course, you're going to make all sorts of excuses to yourself (and possibly us) why you can't do it yet, or you have to see him 'to explain' one last time and so on and so forth. Heard it.

[buzzskillington]

Why don't you consider leaving your own marriage? I suspect that once free, the obsessive thoughts about this guy would dwindle because you'd be happier generally. Currently he is a distraction from your unhappy homelife.