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would/have you ended a relationship for this reason..

(39 Posts)
hariboegg Fri 23-Sep-11 08:28:13

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lubeybooby Fri 23-Sep-11 08:30:22

I wouldn't if he was good with foreplay and other stuff... or at least willing to learn and try other ways to "hit the spot"

Thumbwitch Fri 23-Sep-11 08:31:46

If good sex is important to you and you're not getting it, then either you need to find different positions that work better with a smaller penis, or you will have to improvise with toys.
Otherwise you are going to get very frustrated in time (already?).

I think I may have been on your previous thread - I remember a similar one - but it might have been someone else. Have you tried sitting facing him, while he sits on the edge of the bed? that worked for me with the 2 pinky-sized BFs I had (I know, who could get that lucky twice? hmm)

SansaLannister Fri 23-Sep-11 08:31:50

in other words, small cock? he wouldn't have even made it to relationship stage for me.

RumourOfAHurricane Fri 23-Sep-11 08:32:08

Message withdrawn

hariboegg Fri 23-Sep-11 08:40:17

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SansaLannister Fri 23-Sep-11 08:45:58

I think you've given it a fair shot, it's not working for you. Sex is important to me, if we didn't work well sexually, I'd have to end it.

SansaLannister Fri 23-Sep-11 08:46:56

It could be it's got a small girth or you have a long vagina. Either way, it's bothering you and do you really want to be stuck only able to do it in one position just to get off? Life is too short for crap sex, IMO.

BoastingByStealth Fri 23-Sep-11 09:00:40

Exactly my thoughts, life is too short (excuse the pun) for bad sex.


If everything else is good in the relationship I would give it a go though, and communication was good between us, it could be worked on. It could be fun trying different things.

If he could be "the one" it'd be a shame to finish over this one little (sorry) could end up with a complete arsehole who is fantastic in bed, but all you'd have then was great sex (but can you really have great sex with someone who doesn't value. love or respect you?)

Been there, done that. It's not a happy place to be.

I'd much rather be in a loving relationship.


SansaLannister Fri 23-Sep-11 09:21:15

To me, I don't believe in 'the one', but sex is part of being in a relationship. And if it's just not satisfying and can't be because your bits are incompatible, well, honestly, do you want to spend the rest of your life feeling, well, pardon the pun, unfulfilled? Or only having sex in one position to orgasm?

SirSugar Fri 23-Sep-11 09:30:46

OMG I just got a ruler out to look blush

I would have difficulty with this. Having said that H had a rather large one, but failed to satisfy me which was more of a trust issue. DP is average and hits the spot but thats a trust issue too.

And it all seemed so good haribo...

SansaLannister Fri 23-Sep-11 09:53:21

I don't see why so many women sell themselves short for crap sex because 'well, everything else is good' or 'the next guy you meet might be an arsehole'.

It's entirely possible to have a great relationship with someone and have great sex. It's only when you believe you have to put up with unsatisfying sex because that's all you deserve and should be grateful at least everything else isn't shit that you reap what you sow.

You gave it a good shot, it just isn't working for you. You don't owe this person your life or have to put up with shite sex just to be nice or because the world has a lot of arsehole men in it.

RumourOfAHurricane Fri 23-Sep-11 10:10:06

Message withdrawn

lubeybooby Fri 23-Sep-11 10:22:30

What Shiney said! ^

PfftTheMagicDraco Fri 23-Sep-11 10:29:55

What Shiney said! ^

brianmayshair Fri 23-Sep-11 10:35:09

Yes I would but then i also wouldn't have put up with it for 6 months i would have known after the first time that if it wasn't all good then it was never going to work, poor guy.

3 times a day does seem to be excessive for someone that isn't doing it for you, do you fake it? Have you tried a large vibrator during sex? Perhaps if he is doing it for you in other ways this might work for [ahem] fulfillment purposes

Malificence Fri 23-Sep-11 10:59:23

Now you see, I don't get this, 5 inches is pretty average from what I've read and a vagina is basically a flattened tube that widens to accomodate whatever is inside, I don't know about you but I can feel a small tampon if it's not positioned correctly and given that the first inch of the vagina is a ring of muscle with countless nerve endings, can you see where I'm going with this?
It could well be his shape and or technique but it sounds pretty easily solveable with a change of position or the addition of a cushion under your or his bum to change the angle of penetration wink

Are you sure you're really attracted to him? Are you finding it hard to orgasm and see him as the convenient cause so you aren't querying your physical responses too much?

SansaLannister Fri 23-Sep-11 11:23:30

She's doing it 3x/day with him because it's not like he's making her walk like John Wayne.

gobbledegoop Fri 23-Sep-11 12:01:25

Sometimes it's just too small whatever you try.
Move on, as others have said "life's too short".

I have been in your position and I ended the relationship. I am now with a man who can satisfy me and i'm so glad i didn't put up with crap sex just because he was 'nice in every other way'.

Good luck.

TheMechanicsHaveToWork Fri 23-Sep-11 12:01:29

If my partner could not give me what I needed sexually he never would have made it past the audition stage. The mechanics have to work.
I don't think it's shallow to break up with him for this reason, after all in the first couple of years sex is the very most important thing. If it's not right then the relationship stands no chance. It's just a mechanical incompatibility.

5 inches is small but he would probably do fine with a very petite woman. I wouldn't be interested because it's all about penetration for me. I can easily cum through penetration and cunningilus etc are just second fiddle to the main event as far as I am concerned.

If you are a woman who can accept foreplay instead of penetration and he's good at that then, he could be fine. But if he can't satisfy you with vaginal penetration then this is a major problem.

buzzskillington Fri 23-Sep-11 13:02:08

Yes I'd end it. I assume that if you're doing 3 times a day, you'll have tried loads of positions and tbh, if it's not working for you at the at-it-like-rabbits stage, then it might never. Sex is important. No point settling, go for the whole package.

ShirelyKnottage Fri 23-Sep-11 13:10:29

I hate these threads. I wonder what the reaction would be if a man posted saying that his girlfriends fanny was baggy.

Anyway, having said that - 5 inches is pretty average TBH, I think this is more about technique. Have you talked about this at all with him?

SansaLannister Fri 23-Sep-11 13:28:07

'I wonder what the reaction would be if a man posted saying that his girlfriends fanny was baggy.'

Pretty much the same, as this has come up in the past. If you're sexually incompatible, you are. You give it a shot, it doesn't work for you, you move on.

ScarlettIsWalking Fri 23-Sep-11 13:32:15

That really is a tough one isn't it I feel for you. There is no replacement for a nice big cock.

HairyGrotter Fri 23-Sep-11 13:40:31

I've ended relationships for the same reasons, I say relationships, more like one night stands etc, send them off home. BUT my last relationship, we just didn't click in the bedroom, lot of work needed etc and I just couldn't be arsed.

I need good sex, that's very very important and I would end up resenting the guy. It's not shallow

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