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URGENT - Please help me end this

(9 Posts)
HelpMeEndThis Tue 13-Sep-11 09:32:23

I have to be quick in case DH comes back. I am a regular but have name changed so that DH doesn't know that I have written this.

In short, things have gotten out of hand. DH has taken two of our children this morning and I am praying that he really does drop one at nursery and bring the other one home. I don't trust him to do that though. He is too clever to hurt us in a way that would leave permanent marks (thank goodness) but he has no problem with pushing me over, standing over me and shouting, shoving me etc He also holds the children tightly so that they are forced to 'cuddle' him and says that he is keeping them safe or is punishing them.

I have no way to escape. I don't have my own bank account or my own money. DH keeps saying that I hit the children and that I am a "shit parent" and he doesn't trust me with the children. He keeps on going on about how everything is my fault. If anything isn't done around the house then he shouts at me or gets stroppy. No-one would ever believe me though because he's such a model citizen in public.

I could go on about his behaviour but I need to know what to do. What do I do if he doesn't come home? What do I do if he does? Can I really escape when I don't have any money? I don't think that I would cope with life without him and I love him but this has got to stop.

Flisspaps Tue 13-Sep-11 09:35:56

Ring Women's Aid 0808 2000 247

RabbitPie Tue 13-Sep-11 09:36:38

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

CailinDana Tue 13-Sep-11 09:37:20

Sorry I can't offer practical advice, but there are others who will be along soon hopefully to give you that. All I can say is I agree with you that it has to stop, now, and that you need to get out as quickly as you can. Do you think he would hurt the children? If you do you need to call the police.

ConstanceNoring Tue 13-Sep-11 09:37:25

I'm so sorry for you, - I don't really know what to reply - but I know there are plenty on here who do, with lists of documents to gather and places to phone, - hoping that by bumping this for you it'll keep your thread at the top.

GypsyMoth Tue 13-Sep-11 09:37:43

Why do you think he won't bring them back today?

Women's aid is your best option I think!

deste Tue 13-Sep-11 09:38:10

I'm sure someone will come along with advice for you. What I read from this is that your children and yourself will be better off without him. You can live without him, he is a bully and you have to get out because he probably wont change. You will get good advice on here so keep strong.

TimeForMeIsFree Tue 13-Sep-11 09:39:30

Yes you can leave him with no money. I left my ex and had nothing. Women's Aid helped me with everything. Put your trust in them, they are there for you and will help you every single step of the way. Give them a call OP and you will never look back. Stay safe.

If you can't ring - you can email on helpline@womensaid.org.uk

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