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What does it mean when a man-one that your are not related to, touches your face?

(31 Posts)
vaindemi Wed 07-Sep-11 13:21:34

Started thread on chat, got a lot of light-hearted responses-which is OK and I don't mind, but maybe thought relationships was best place to ask because, hopefully, there'll be a more serious response here.
Guy I really, really fancy (both of us are single) was chatting to me the other day and he touched by left cheek (with his hand before anybody makes a joke wink. Could this mean that he finds me attractive?

HairyGrotter Wed 07-Sep-11 13:24:49

Just ask him. Or, get him drunk

loopylou6 Wed 07-Sep-11 13:27:05

I would say he finds you attractive. Why don't you ask him out for a drink?

vaindemi Wed 07-Sep-11 13:28:44

To be honest, I'd probably think the same if somebody else asked about this, but when it's yourself, you'd like others opinions IYSWIM.

vaindemi Wed 07-Sep-11 13:29:50

It seems a bit of an intimate thing to do from somebody who is not (yet) close to you, isn't it? Touching their face, that is.

G1nger Wed 07-Sep-11 14:19:32

Well let's put it this way, no one who's not a lover has ever done this to me. Was he brushing off food, though? ;)

vaindemi Wed 07-Sep-11 14:57:02

Lol. I hadn't eaten. It's a good sign. Thanks all.

nametapes Wed 07-Sep-11 15:35:41

Yeah, he does like you.....maybe a bit of a liberty, but then i dont know how intimately you were chatting and whether he was a bit tiddly or not. ? ? ?

SunRaysthruClouds Wed 07-Sep-11 16:11:03

He wanted to see if you had disguised facial hair

emsyj Wed 07-Sep-11 17:52:25

I would find it rather creepy if someone who I wasn't related to or romantically involved with did this. If you didn't fancy him, would your toes have curled?

If he does that to you when he either (1) has no idea whether you like him or not or (2) knows you like him but has chosen not to pursue it by asking you out then I see that as a bad sign tbh. If he doesn't know that you fancy him, it is a very intimate way to touch someone and is inappropriate. If he does know, but hasn't asked you out and tried to pursue a relationship with you (because he feels the same), I would be concerned that he might take advantage of you by pursuing a physical relationship without any sort of attachment or commitment.

Will probably get flamed for this, but in my view you need to be very careful as this would be a huge red flag for me.

Proudnscary Wed 07-Sep-11 18:51:07

I was just trying to work out what a man-one was.

Errrr...I wouldn't really read too much into it, just see what or what doesn't unfold.

<Wonders why she responded really>

vaindemi Wed 07-Sep-11 19:26:58

Interesting view, emsyj, oh yes, my toes would have curled if I had not fancied him and I would immediately have moved his hand away and probably dealt with the matter with a joke but made it quite clear that it was unacceptable. But I do fancy him so I feel different about it.

I'm not going to flame you, you've put a downer on it for me, but don't worry, I did ask for opinions wink

Just got to see how it goes, I suppose.

peppapighastakenovermylife Wed 07-Sep-11 20:05:11

Ooh I need more details.

Tell us more about the situation - what were you doing, where and how did he touch you / why?

<lives vicariously through others possible romance and those hormones>


MangoMonster Wed 07-Sep-11 20:14:24

That's a sweet caring thing to do. A guy once told me that if a bloke touches your face he really likes you. But I guess it depends on the guy, does he do it to others a lot?

LindsayWagner Wed 07-Sep-11 20:17:04

Ew, creepy. Sorry, but completely what emsyj said. Boundaries, innit.

peppapighastakenovermylife Wed 07-Sep-11 20:20:37

But could it not just be a way of flirting - perhaps he likes her but doesnt have the confidence that she likes him?

emsyj Wed 07-Sep-11 20:35:41

Hmmm, isn't confident that she likes him and doesn't want to say 'fancy a drink down the pub on Friday night?' but is happy to touch her in really quite an intrusive and intimate way without so much as a by-your-leave? Nah. I reckon he knows she likes him and is rubbing his hands in glee at the prospect of taking full advantage of the fact.

peppapighastakenovermylife Wed 07-Sep-11 20:40:34

The cynic versus the romantic grin.

Good point.

I think it all depends on how he touched her face. And how much they know each other. And his personality.

Sweet/ shy guy gently and briefly touching her face in a smily way = good

Over confident guy playing her and knowing it = bad

emsyj Wed 07-Sep-11 20:50:41

I guess I just don't see a sweet/shy guy touching a woman's face when they are not involved intimately unless it is in a romantic movie... To me, that just isn't natural and wouldn't happen in real life.

I think in general if a man is keen on you, he will ask you out (rather than fondle your face - or any other part of you!) grin

peppapighastakenovermylife Wed 07-Sep-11 20:59:36

grin at the face fondling. Now that does sound creepy!

What about a touch on the knee? Shoulder? Hand?

emsyj Wed 07-Sep-11 21:19:15

Touch on the knee - bit intrusive and would imagine normally done by drunk people

Touch on the shoulder - patronising (I would recoil even if DH did that! But I have a 'thing' about people touching my back)

Touch on the hand - within normal social boundaries. Acceptable. You would shake hands with a stranger, touching hands is not intimate.

peppapighastakenovermylife Wed 07-Sep-11 21:40:24

Hmmm....see I think a time scale needs to be added. Within a period of flirtation that leads up to a date I would find a touch on the knee flirtatious not creepy.

Disclaimer - I haven't dated since I was a teenager grin

peppapighastakenovermylife Wed 07-Sep-11 21:40:38

And please come back OP!

emsyj Wed 07-Sep-11 22:01:32

Yes, we need to know who is right OP!!! The romantic or the cynic!

LindsayWagner Wed 07-Sep-11 22:07:29

She will wake up in the morning and he will be staring at her face, very close. You mark my words. Mark them.

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