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Help my 6 year old says he dosnt love daddy.

(6 Posts)
charlotte12345 Sun 28-Aug-11 23:33:34

We have 6 year old twins (boys) and one has always said he didn't love daddy and we laughed it off but recently he has been asking if daddy can go and live in another house, because he dosnt love him which is strange no problem with the other one, but he won't have kisses or cuddles with him, tonight I asked why are you being horrible to daddy and he said because I don't love him and he was deadly serious what do we do.

solidgoldbrass Sun 28-Aug-11 23:36:10

Is there any possibility that your DP treats the twins differently? If not, it could be as simple as your DS having found the perfect parent-wind-up and enjoying airing it. You could try telling him that even if he doesn;t love daddy, he must be polite and not nasty, because it's wrong to be nasty to anyone.

charlotte12345 Sun 28-Aug-11 23:46:42

Hi I said that to him today, he does lavish more attention on the other but always try's but it get thrown back at him, it really seems like their is no conection or feeling there for daddy strange.

FabbyChic Mon 29-Aug-11 00:08:46

When my son was 4 he used to tell me he liked dad more, it hurt like fuck, he done it for months, I was estranged from his dad and had been for 18 months.

He grew out of it though.

If your husband has been favouring one over the other your son is going to feel abandoned and unloved. Affection has to be shared all your partner can do is keep trying to reach him before the rift becomes too large.

InTheArmyNow Mon 29-Aug-11 21:45:01

If your ds is saying he doesn't love/like daddy, then there is a reason for it. Wherever it is coming from, the only way to change that is for your DH to start and recreate a bond/trust with his son.
That means plenty of time to play, spending tie together, even if it's just watching a cartoon and laughing together about the characters/situation.
I would also say to have a serious look at the tone of voice/expression he is using when he is talking to his ds.
I wouldn't say to a 6yo that 'he is being horrible to his dad'. If he is trying to wind you up, then it's working. If he isn't and really is feeling unloving towards his dad, then you are negating his feeling and making him feel bad about not loving his dad. A big thing to put on a child's shoulder.

But most importantly, I would takle that comment as the expression of a very serious issue that needs to be tackled.

ImperialBlether Mon 29-Aug-11 22:47:35

It's natural for your partner to want to spend less time with a son who says he doesn't love him, but he should be spending more time with him.

Does your husband know what his son says?

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