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Initiating Sex

(24 Posts)
SaggyHairyArse Sat 27-Aug-11 11:05:54

How do you do it?

Just wondering as I don't think I am very good at it blush

CookieRookie Sat 27-Aug-11 11:21:41

Depends on so many things. What's the back story? Married, longterm dating, how long you been together?

SaggyHairyArse Sat 27-Aug-11 11:25:36

Long term dating previous BF from 14 years ago, together 18 months.

cyb Sat 27-Aug-11 12:09:22

Just say it

'Fancy a bit of <whistles>?'

Doesnt he initaite it?

Malificence Sat 27-Aug-11 13:52:02

Well this morning I just said, "that was a nice cup of tea, are you going to shag me senseless now?" So he did. grin
I've got two methods, subtle overtures or sledgehammer bluntness, guess which this morning was?

peppapighastakenovermylife Sat 27-Aug-11 14:30:07

Malificience grin Subtle right?

maras2 Sat 27-Aug-11 16:52:54

'Fancy a quickie?' has worked for us over 44 years.Not subtle I know but .......

Onemorning Sat 27-Aug-11 17:01:20

In the past I've taken DH's hand and walked him upstairs. He gets the hint pretty quickly. smile

TheCrackFox Sat 27-Aug-11 17:04:06

"fancy a shag?"

Never let me down in 15yrs.

TDada Sat 27-Aug-11 17:30:18

Think Clint Eastwood used to say "honey have you glossed.". To each his/her own.

TDada Sat 27-Aug-11 17:30:43

"glossed" not glossed

TDada Sat 27-Aug-11 17:31:14

Flossed....bloody smart text on the iPad

chris123456 Sat 27-Aug-11 17:51:10

or glossed and flossed!

wannabefree Sat 27-Aug-11 20:27:52

Just start kissing him don't have to actually say anything! confused

TDada Sat 27-Aug-11 23:44:08

Does your DP like sex? Is there an imbalance in terms of desire in your relationship?

sabi333 Sun 28-Aug-11 04:28:13

I'm on the shyer side so I generally just climb on top if he is on the couch or on a chair and start kissing. Otherwise I send a text to see what he is up to and if he wants to be distracted ;).

Spuddybean Sun 28-Aug-11 10:41:54

My DP and i agree on days and times so no initiation is needed really. He hates it if i initiate when he is busy (he is also not into kissing much). And he doesn't really initiate it as a spontaneous thing.

Eg. Yesterday we were planning our day, so we decided we'd lunch, clean, gym, put up the new blind, have sex, make dinner/play deus ex, bed.

That meant i didn't have to keep looming at him and we could get ourselves worked up for it.

We have also scheduled a session for this avo - we have fetishes so things need to be planned a bit.

Works for us. I know some people shudder at the thought of organised passion though.

LeBOF Sun 28-Aug-11 10:46:11

<imagines Spuddy laboriously talking up the rubber suit>

Just say summat- I don't do subtle.

everlong Sun 28-Aug-11 10:47:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LeBOF Sun 28-Aug-11 10:47:33

Bloody iPad here too- talcing grin. Unless you do need to talk to it too. Probably before it's glossed...

Spuddybean Sun 28-Aug-11 12:22:26

haha actually i do have a rubber full body 'onesy' and it takes ages to get in (about 45 mins). So i've only ever worn it twice sad

oldenoughtowearpurple Sun 28-Aug-11 12:39:44

Saggy - if you want to be subtle then holding a eye contact just a few seconds too long with a slight smirk on your face works for us. But then so does 'Man Of Household, Bed! Now!' given as a command, or a very unsubtle stroke of his trousers. Or stripping off my pjs and rubbing up close in bed. Or just grabbing his dick. In fact, I can't think of a single initiation tactic that has ended badly.

Spuddy - two questions
1) you PLAN it in the day in-between washing up and the WII???? Do you allocate a set amount of time?
2) if it takes 45 mins to get on, then how long does it take to get off and is that what the fun is, or does it have -ahem- convenient access points?

Spuddybean Sun 28-Aug-11 16:27:28

olde it depends what we are planning tbh. And yes we set aside about 3 hours. If we're just going vanilla (which we also enjoy very much) then not as much prep or time allocated, but still usually previously decided.

DP travels loads and we work long hours so it's easy for the weekend to slip by without chores done or enough time dedicated to sex. So we plan. (I cant feel sexy if the house is a mess or if i feel it's going to be left up to me to clean the whole thing when he's away).

We set the alarm extra early some days for a quickie before work - but it is always agreed the night before. We both hate being woken up for sex and have hardly ever (apart from in the 1st 3 months) done it spontaneously.

The rubber suit takes seconds to peel off...but there are also zipped access points. wink

Spuddybean Sun 28-Aug-11 16:28:44

oh yes, and it's an xbox 360!

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