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what's wrong with me?

(4 Posts)
natandjacob Fri 05-Aug-11 13:40:00

Dont know if there's much anyone can do to help, I just need a bit of a moan. All I want is some friends but I just cant seem able to make any. I used to be aggraphobic (spelling?) and depressed years ago and lost a lot of friends from pushing them all away. I decided to make a fresh start and move to another city where I met my partner and ended up having our lovely DS. I haven't made many friends here though, well actually I've only made the 1 friend and I'm feeling rather lonely.

I go to different playgroups with DS and do make an effort to smile and chat with the other mums but not got close to any of them. Begining to wonder if its something im doing? I know I can come across as a bit unapprochable sometimes as i get nervous meeting new people and never really know what to talk about. I'm so bored, I just want some nice mummy friends to go out and play with! what can I do?!

mumsamilitant Fri 05-Aug-11 13:51:19

Hi Honey, How long have you been in the city now? How old is you daughter? Mother and baby groups can be very clicky (I know as I used to run one!). I made quite a few friends once my son started Primary School.

pollyblue Fri 05-Aug-11 14:46:25

Maybe you're hoping to find friends in the wrong place - I've got a couple of friends who I've known for several years, we were friends before we had children and just happened to have them at the same time. I've found it really hard to make friends with other mums through toddler groups or dds playgroup - I'm on chatting terms with many of them and feel we're "friendly" but not friends in the sense that we go out socially. They're all very busy with their families and work.

What about joining a class, gym, group which interests you? I started going to college one day a week about 18 months ago and have made several good friends there. I'm also studying a subject I love and hope to make a career.

HTH smile. Loneliness is awful.

natandjacob Fri 05-Aug-11 14:51:45

DS is 1 year old, been in the city about 2 and a half years. Thought I'd make friends with my job when I first moved up but found that I didnt have much in common with a lot of the people there which was a shame. Maybe you're right pollyblue, I should take up a new hobby. Only problem is my partner doesnt have a set finish time for work so I can never really plan what nights he will be back in time for me to go out. I'm hoping to find a job and return to work soon so hopefully that might help...fingers crossed!!

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