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Sensible words needed

(4 Posts)
Funkmeister Wed 29-Jun-11 21:45:54

I think I've gone mental......been with DP 15 months now, I found out he was keeping in touch with a former f*ckbuddy, he said it was the occasional email just enquiring how the other was, apparently always instigated by her. I said I wasn't happy with this and wanted it to stop, initially he got on his high horse and said no, as it's just friends he didn't see what the problem was, I said if you've had the sort of friendship they had, it raised a red flag and I didn't like it. I refused to leave it and he said as I was so upset by it he'd ignore any future mails and she'd get the message and it'd fizzle out. Well, as far as I know no mails were sent (tho whether I believe that I don't know) until the 8th of may enquiring as of his happiness and get in touch. I then discovered she'd sent another one a month later begging him to let her know he was ok and happy! He did tell me about these (only after I pressed him) and still maintained he should ignore them. I categorically stated no way and if he didn't tell her to fck off, I would! He sat down and drafted a polite email saying sorry he didn't reply to her messages but that he felt it was inappropriate for them to stay in touch, sorry if that offended her and he wished her happiness. He got a mail back within 5 minutes saying so glad he was ok and she will forever think of him fondly.....and signed it off as Magic nipples ;-)............he tried to hide the last bit but I mad him tell me and I went ape! Cheeky cow!!! I so wanted to email her and give her a mouthful but decided to leave it.....thing is I'm so angry that he had continued to email her for so long and I can't believe their conversations weren't of a sexual nature......how do I leave this alone??!!!!! It's driving me nuts!!

ItsMeAndMyPuppyNow Wed 29-Jun-11 22:00:21

Well, on the plus side he did (eventually) let her down politely, and she promptly and politely accepted to be let down.

So: mission accomplished.

Wisedupwoman Wed 29-Jun-11 22:01:44

I'd say if there's no other reason for you to think it's been anything other than two previous fuckbuddies, and your DP isn't up for it any more, then I'd let it go. He did as you asked, he sounds embarressed by it, and he politely told her he's not interested.

I don't really think you can ask any more of him tbh.

Funkmeister Thu 30-Jun-11 00:32:29

Thank you for your sensible comments, see? I am mental!!!

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