This is more of a rant to 'get it all of my chest' than a question i suppose.
Brief background......I am a single parent to 2, i work fulltime and i am the main carer to my elderly and disabled parents.
My dad has parkinsons disaese and prostate cancer and needs help getting in and out of bed, help with dressing etc (carers come in to shower him etc) but alot of the work falls on my mum (who is registered blind but has a small amount of vision), she is there all day with him so has to fetch and carry for him and help him with toileting etc. They do have a cleaner to make life easier. I go round everyday, i do online shop for them, i sort out all paperwork, banking etc and i go round at night to put dad to bed. I clean him up when he has accidents and i do all i can to make their life easier. I cook meals and take them round and make stuff to put in the freezer.I take them on holiday every year.They cant leave the house without me so i take them out whenever i can.
My mum constantly moans at me about my lack of help and about how hard it is for her (i know it is hard for her), if she wants something doing it has to be done now and cant possibly wait, she also moans that i never take her out (took her out monday, weds, saturday and sunday last week). She rings me at least twice a day with things she needs doing which can not possibly wait and i try my hardest to get them done but even if i do she will find fault or the things i did this afternoon needed to be done this morning.
My brother lives an hour and a half drive away, his kids are in their 20's and have left home so its just him and SIL, he visits for the day about every 3 months and after he has been i have to listen to my mum going on about'how wonderful he is and how lovely it was that he found time in his hectic life to visit mum and dad and how nice it was he took them out for a meal (i take them out every other week for tea) and how mum gave him some money to take SIL out for a nice meal sometime because they work so hard and deserve it!!'
My dad is so lovely and appreciates everything i do for him and he just asks me not to say anything to my mum about all of this as he hates any kind of upset or confrontation but its really getting me down. I just feel like packing my bags and running away, just not sure how much longer i can bite my tongue really.
Oh well, rant over, if you made it this far, well done!!
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Relationships
How come my brother is wonderful yet I do everything for my parents and i am the bad guy?
FeelingOld · 28/06/2011 12:12
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