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I'v been to The Freedom Programme again today

(18 Posts)
NotSuchASmugMarriedNow Tue 21-Jun-11 19:01:26

and I feel absolutely drained and exhausted for the whole day long after I've been to one of these.

Has anyone else done The Freedom Programme.

Can't motivate myself to do anything now

Jellykat Tue 21-Jun-11 20:00:15

Yes i have, and an now on 'The Recovery toolkit' programme which is the follow on..

It is exhausting, so much to think about, a lot of emotional stuff felt, and a lot to take in! It is intense.

I think just relaxing and contemplating afterwards is a good idea!

janetsplanet Tue 21-Jun-11 20:06:12

I have done the freedom program twice. once whilst in a relationship, and again when i had gotten out of it. They can be very emotional but stick with it smile

jayho Tue 21-Jun-11 20:50:27

I just cried all through my first session, the relief at being with other people who knew what I'd been through coupled with the despair at seeing a group of mothers subjected to the same shit was overwhelming. I can't go tomorrow so my case worker's coming to me bless her. stick with it smile

HerHissyness Tue 21-Jun-11 22:39:00

Oh god, I'll probably howl at mine then... sad

I don't really have anyone in RL to talk about it with. Only one friend who asked me to open up to her, but I feel bad about sobbing everytime I see her!

coproxamol Tue 21-Jun-11 22:52:48

I have been contemplating doing this course. But do I really want DCs to see me so emotionally drained if it's so hard?
What are the benefits?

HerHissyness Tue 21-Jun-11 23:01:02

It's good for the DC to see a little of how strong you have to be to be free from bullies.

Jellykat Tue 21-Jun-11 23:33:05

coproxamol When we say its emotional, that's a bad thing.. After years of abuse there's a lot to understand about what happened, and why. Also a lot that you may have taken on board that wasn't your responsibility.

Plus, it's a truly safe confidential trusting environment, and you are with women that understand exactly how you feel, regardless of age, background etc

With the programme i'm on, we're learning about assertiveness, self esteem, mental health, we talk about our week, and yet enjoy a laugh. In fact we've all decided to continue with a support group when we've finished the course, on the WA premises.

Jellykat Tue 21-Jun-11 23:34:08

Oops, that should've said that's not a bad thing!

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow Tue 21-Jun-11 23:41:45

The benefits for me are at least it's "better out than in"

once your feelings and emotions have opened up, although it is painful, you can at least deal with it. Whereas for years before that, all my emotions were suppressed and pent up and it was that (amongst other things) that made me physically ill and depressed.

And so what if you howl, HerHissyness? Its natural to feel distraught after what we've suffered and all you'd be doing is being open and honest about your feelings.

As draining as it is, I am SOOOO glad I am going, I feel terrible the same day I go but much better the following day and onwards.

FaffTastic Wed 22-Jun-11 00:51:27

If you don't mind me asking, what is the Freedom Programme? is it for women who are in physically or emotionally abusive relationships?

Jellykat Wed 22-Jun-11 08:56:20

Yes Faff, but not just 'in'.. have ever been too.
There was a lady on mine, whose experience had happened 9 years ago,and her H was in fact dead, but she hadn't felt able to think about it previously...

HerHissyness Wed 22-Jun-11 15:53:42

Faff, it's for anyone that has ever been in an abusive relationship.

This stuff won't just heal by itself.

FaffTastic Wed 22-Jun-11 16:25:52

Thanks, just never heard of Freedom Prog before. Well done to the brave ladies that are on it.

humptydidit Wed 22-Jun-11 22:09:18

Hi All
I am on week 5 of freedom programme...

I have found it overall to be hugely helpful. I think the first few weeks were a bit more awkward while we kind of "got into it" but now it seems like we can actually start to have a bit of a laugh. I don't mean laugh at eachother, but laugh at these stupid men and try to see that bright side, which is all of our positive futures.

In my group there is one woman who came to the first 4 sessions and literally did not say one word. Then this week she was able to speak. She apologised to us all for actually speaking (which is so sad that she felt the need to do taht btw) and then said that she had wanted to speak every week but it had taken her 4 whole sessions to get up the courage. It was lovely seeing her come out of her shell a bit and everyone was so positive and supportive to her smile.

There is another girl who came to the first 2 sessions and cried all the way thru and hasn't been back which is such a shame, but she's just not in the right place just now. But she knows that she can come back if she wants to, or join in the next time the course runs. So I mean, it doesn't matter if it's not the right time for you, you can always just sit and listen, or sign up for the next one.

The other thing which is nice is that all the support workers seem to know eachother. The course I'm on is run in a children's centre and run by staff there who also act as support workers for some of the ladies there. And then there are others of us, like me who live in the next town who have a different support worker, but they all know eachother and it feels like you are being supported by a big family of the staff and the other women there!

It is emotional at times, but it is positive like someone else said. It's all part of healing. I personally think that it's more healthy to take a good look at something and see it for what it is, before you file it away and move on. Rather than burying stuff which might all come tumbling out later on iyswim.

Stick with it ladies and those of you who don't have one... get yourself and domestic abuse support worker. They are worth their weight in gold too!!

xx

HerHissyness Wed 22-Jun-11 23:22:27

how do you get a DA support worker humpty?

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow Wed 22-Jun-11 23:49:49

Contact Womens Aid who will put you in touch with someone in your area.

HerHissyness Thu 23-Jun-11 00:19:42

cheers notsuch! grin

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