Hi Mums,
I gave birth to my first (and only) child at the age of 35. At that time my husband was 42 years old. This is first marriage and first child for both of us. We have been married for 2 years before we both decided that we would like to have a baby. When I was 4 months pregnant we both decided to share this wonderful news with my mother in law. I was hoping that the news about my pregnancy will cheer her up but she become visibly upset as soon as we told her about it. In fact my husband seemed to be frightened to tell her that I am pregnant and at the end of the evening I had to break the ice. Since that day my husband started ignoring me and criticizing the way I looked and become verbally abusive towards me and when I was 37 weeks pregnant his mother did the same telling me that my stomach is enormous and that I look obese and that my ?enormous? appetite will harm the baby. I gave birth to my son 5 months ago and I can tell you that I am 5.6 feet tall and I am wearing dress size 12 at the moment.
After I brought our baby son from the hospital my mother in law started coming to our house on daily base and she would always bring her dog with her who was visibly jealous of the baby. I was tolerating everything until one day dog has actually attacked my baby and almost beaten his head. I have asked my mother in law to live her dog at home but she replied that the dog means everything to her and that she will never again come to my house if her dog is not allowed in. And this is where my drama started. She complained to my husband and he couldn?t cope to see his mother upset. Then she phoned my GP to say that I must be suffering from PND and although I didn?t feel depressed I whent for the appointment and was reassured that everything is OK with my mental health. Mother in law wasn?t happy with this and she insisted that my husband make another appointment with another GP to check me for PND. After attending second appointment together with my husband we were told that I am not depressed and that we have relationship problems and need to go for counselling. We had 2 sessions with marriage counsellor before my husband was told that his attachment to his mother is ?too intense? and that he need to book separate appointment for himself. This was very upsetting for him and he decided to stop going for counselling all together.
His mother continued steering up and telling him that i am ?out of control? and after 3 months of constant arguments my husband become violent towards me in front of our baby and he was arrested by police. His solicitor managed to get him out and he only received verbal warning. I was bruised all over my body and couldn?t understand how he was let out unpunished. I applied for divorce soon after this happend but as soon as he was served with divorce letter he become even more violent and he was arrested for the second time. This time he was realised only with written warning.
I was very much frightened for my and my baby?s safety so I had applied for Non Molestation and Occupation Order. The Emergency Injunction was granted for a period of 1 month and next week we will have second hearing when my husband will be given chance to defend himself or the order will be extended . Although I have reported violence to the Police on 2 occasions and I also have pictures of the injures that I have suffered i am still very much worried if I will be able to convince the Judge that my husband is a dangerous man. He is a wealthy man and can afford the best solicitor and probably pay for the witnesses if necessary.
Does anyone have good advice how prove Domestic Violence ? I had enjoyed 2 wonderful years of our marriage and was able to establish satisfactory relationship with my mother in law.
I would like to understand why did it all change when I got pregnant?
Sorry for making you read such a long story...
Thanks,
Nina
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Relationships
My husband become violent 3 months after I gave birth to our son
52 replies
NinaWi · 20/02/2011 01:09
OP posts:
Rhadegunde ·
20/02/2011 09:15
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