Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

wanking while i'm in the shower

(282 Posts)
isheaknob Sun 18-Jul-10 18:58:54

ok have a bf of 9 months. have got really close lately. he stays over at mine 2-3 times a week.
anyway he tried it on this morning and i said no i wasn't up for it as i needed to sort the kids out (they were downstairs watching tv). so i have a very quick shower and come back into the bedroom. he has a towel wrapped around him when before he had boxers. i ask him why and he said he was getting ready for a shower and his boxers were in his bag.
so he has a shower and it becomes obvious that he had a very quick wank while i was in the shower. i confronted him and he admitted it saying that he didn't think it was wrong as he was feeling extra horny! he said sorry but now i just feel weird about it. the thing is its not like he hasn't had it in a while as we have been doing it twice the last few days.
just need some female views as i'm not sure if i'm over re-acting. just because i say no does that mean he has to go and jerk off!
oh by the way am a regular and am far too embarrassed to have my real name blush

MrsWobbleTheWaitress Sun 18-Jul-10 19:00:25

I have to say I don't know. My DH isn't into wanking at all, but I'm aware he's pretty unusual! I think it's very normal for most men, and I don't think I'd be pissed off about it if it were me.

Librashavinganotherbiscuit Sun 18-Jul-10 19:01:50

Why do you feel weird about it?

ninah Sun 18-Jul-10 19:01:53

reminds me of opening credits of American Beauty
I wouldn't make an issue of it personally

ChickensHaveNoEyebrows Sun 18-Jul-10 19:03:16

What exactly is upsetting you here? You didn't want to have sex, and he sorted himself out. Personally, I wouldn't have 'confronted' him, you probably embarassed him and made him feel awkward. I don't think he should have to apologise for touching his own body, personally.

PussinJimmyChoos Sun 18-Jul-10 19:04:03

All men wank in the shower and the ones that tell you they don't are lying

It suits the lazy bastards down to the ground...soap for extra lube and jizz right down the plug hole so no extra clean up on their part

Lazy feckers

Dalrymps Sun 18-Jul-10 19:04:43

I wouldn't read too much in to it, he was just feeling horney ad ge said and thought he'd relieve himself whilst he had the chance. No reflection on you I'm sure, he probably got excited thinking about being with you. The fact he didn't say so straight away was probably cause he was a bit embarrassed.

MoreCrackThanHarlem Sun 18-Jul-10 19:04:49

Scandalous behaviour
Ring the papers

Can see the headlines now
'Pervert Nailed in Quick Wank Horror'

isheaknob Sun 18-Jul-10 19:04:51

i just feel weird as i feel like he doesn't respect me and has come into my bed and jerked off. i know everyone plays with themselves and i don't have an issuse with that its just the fact i feel like he can't even wait until he gets home or just not have it for once.

whirligig Sun 18-Jul-10 19:04:54

His first choice was sex, with you. If you weren't in the mood/weren't able then masturbating, if he felt the need, was more honourable than to pressure you for sex.

ninah Sun 18-Jul-10 19:05:48

oh I thought he was in the shower

Rafwife Sun 18-Jul-10 19:07:14

He had a quick morning wank, men are their most horny in the morning it's when their testosterone peaks in most cases.

Masturbating shouldn't be seen as wrong it is natural to want to wank. I don't see the issue personally. He probably feels shit you went snooping for evidence. How did you know?

BettyTurnip Sun 18-Jul-10 19:07:30

He felt randy but you weren't up for it, he respected that and therefore sorted himself out. Really don't see the problem.

ChickensHaveNoEyebrows Sun 18-Jul-10 19:08:15

Don't you ever masturbate, OP?

ItsGraceActually Sun 18-Jul-10 19:08:40

He invited you, you weren't available so he had sex with himself instead. Totally acceptable imo.

isheaknob Sun 18-Jul-10 19:11:03

chicken yes i do but not when i'm in someone elses house and bed and they are in the shower. i just feel like he could have respected me a bit and waited till he got home.

Sammyuni Sun 18-Jul-10 19:11:52

Can't see what he did wrong here he wanted sex with you, and you told him no so he sorted himself out.

Doesn't respect you? i think he sorting himself shows more respect then him pressuring you for sex. You have to remember you are 2 people not one so when one is in the mood those that mean the person can't do anything because the partner is not in the mood?

skidoodly Sun 18-Jul-10 19:12:46

I don't know, wanking in somebody else's bed is a bit yucky.

Anyway 9 months in if you're feeling uncomfortable with things there's really no reason to stick around.

isheaknob Sun 18-Jul-10 19:13:48

this is why i posted on here so i could see if i was being unresonable about it and i guess i am by the amount of you who think its acceptable. thank you for your replies smile

isheaknob Sun 18-Jul-10 19:14:53

would you really wank in someone elses bed while their kids are downstairs hmm

Librashavinganotherbiscuit Sun 18-Jul-10 19:15:24

But it's not just someone elses house it's his GIRLFRIENDS house which is slightly different when it comes to sexual ettiquette (ttttt) I would have thought.

Rafwife Sun 18-Jul-10 19:17:16

Tbf to him and no I am not simplifying all men when I say this.

But I guess 9 months in you have seen some fair action in that bed no? He stays there half the week now? Maybe he just saw it as part of his space you know didn't think to deeply about it because of all the naughties you do in there any way?

See say it was his mums bed then I'd be a bit hmm

teameric Sun 18-Jul-10 19:17:35

I can see why you feel weird as you haven't been with him long, but he was horny and he had to do something about it! its not disrespecting you its probably cos he fancies the arse off you! wink

AnyFucker Sun 18-Jul-10 19:18:49

I see nothing wrong in the OP, tbh

You didn't want/have time for a shag.

He sorted himself out.

TBH, I would have sorted him out myself wink, or got up half an hour earlier and actually had the shag.

You have only been together for 9 months ? Why aren't you going at it like rabbits ? grin

StormyWeather Sun 18-Jul-10 19:20:42

Don't see the problem myself - you'd never had known if you hadn't confronted him.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: