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Help please- DH has cold feet about extension

(13 Posts)
plus3 Fri 03-Nov-17 20:52:20

Can anyone point me in the direction of a good website that will talk us (as complete novices) through a building project?
We have plans,building permission and building regulations all done, but have stalled at finding a builder & getting quotes.I finally got a reason out of DH as to why we aren't moving forward...he just feels totally out of his depth. He is a perfectionist who procrastinates when not sure about something.
Any advice gratefully received.
Thanks

plus3 Fri 03-Nov-17 22:06:44

Anyone?

northlondonlassie Fri 03-Nov-17 22:31:22

Is there slack in your budget to pay someone to manage the project for you?

OneMoreTune Fri 03-Nov-17 22:35:27

Google some local builders and ask around for recommendations. Check reviews etc. Ask them to quote, probably you need 3-4 quotes for comparison.

Once you’ve had a quote and chat with various builders, you’ll feel on firmer ground. You don’t have to appoint anyone. You can just get quotes in and see how you feel after that.

plus3 Fri 03-Nov-17 22:43:36

Thanks for the replies - I wish! I would love a project manager, definitely not in the budget....I think this is such a steep learning curve - we are not the most proactive of couples.
I think the quotes are the thing that will make it most real. I just need to make it not seem so daunting to DH. We have got a local recommendation - so maybe we should start just asking.

OneMoreTune Sat 04-Nov-17 00:16:23

Just ring them up on Monday and arrange a time for them to come round, discuss your plans and look at the house. Don’t worry about the actual carrying out of said works just yet. One step at a time (and get more than one quote in just so you are psychologically, as much as practically, not reliant on this one particular builder).

tralaaa Sat 04-Nov-17 05:16:18

My husband is a builder and he manages the build if you have no one to recommend a builder go to your local builders merchant (where builders get their materials) and ask them to recommend someone. I would go with a small company. Then check them out on google - my DH has a web page. He will also offer to take them to see other jobs he’s done. Don’t pay up front but agree to stage payments. Once you met a builder you like you will feel better about it all - good luck

Believeitornot Sat 04-Nov-17 07:49:36

Our builder effectively project manages the different trades. My main tip is to make sure that we are around in the week a few days here and there to check on things regularly (we both work).

There’s a good book on extensions which is aimed at novices.

You have to accept though that there will be mistakes and delays, miscommunication etc. Nothing like this will run perfectly but the outcome is what you’re aiming for.

twinone Sat 04-Nov-17 07:56:27

Our builder managed all the other trades, although they didn't come as a team, they seemed to work together often.

Our side return double storey extension, so quite big, went without a hitch. Not sure if we were just very lucky though.
The worst part for me, was the final bits, the plumber drove me nuts.

Good luck, I hope it all goes smoothly.

Believeitornot Sat 04-Nov-17 09:17:41

Our builder effectively project manages the different trades. My main tip is to make sure that we are around in the week a few days here and there to check on things regularly (we both work).

There’s a good book on extensions which is aimed at novices.

You have to accept though that there will be mistakes and delays, miscommunication etc. Nothing like this will run perfectly but the outcome is what you’re aiming for.

PineConesAplenty Sat 04-Nov-17 09:35:27

My builder had been one for over 20 years so had the same team of plumbers/electricians etc.

He basically project managed it with me being here full time to nosey consult at any given moment.

Even the structural engineer only cost me £160 he didn't do a site inspection, we literally took a photo of the exposed construction so he could see what our house was made of, he emailed us the diagram with the necessary details in for the builder (and for building regs) as we didn't want a pillar of bricks, so we hid a vertical steel in the wall on which to rest the horizontal steel for the original back wall of the house.

All I had to do was be here to let the trades in. It was a simple kitchen extension. I made a ridiculous amount of cups of tea and biscuits but it was worth it.

I'll be honest, it went smoothly, cost me £300 more than expected due to building regs people asking for something, was done in the time frame expected. Builder was incredibly tidy, not cheeky, did not use my hoover or any of that crap. I paid him directly into his bank account for a week's work.

In the end I just wanted my house back but that was just because I was tired of it all. No complaints about the work or people.

You have to imagine yourselves on the other side of it. What is your extension giving you that you haven't got now?

It's a bit like a crap pregnancy - you think of the baby at the end of it.

Spiderpants Sat 04-Nov-17 10:21:28

as @tralaaa has said.
My OH is a builder and this is how he runs his projects
DO NOT PAY UP FRONT

plus3 Sat 04-Nov-17 10:24:19

thanks everyone - we are doing a double back & side extension, which will destroy the house whilst being done (think we will move into in-laws for worst part)
We will,talk to our surveyor & see if we can actually get the name of his preferred builders - it doesn't help that he is hugely busy and is really slow at getting back to us tbh we are being too polite about chasing him....

We so need to do this extension - DD is in a tiny box room, so it will give her a much bigger space. We go from 3 beds to 4, the whole house is run down & shabby. We bought it to improve it - also the only way to get a 4 bed was to do it ourselves - done houses were out of our budget
I feel I have to apologise for the state of the house.

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