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House with style out in the sticks, or sensible house on estate near school

(40 Posts)
Bowlersx5 Sun 22-May-16 21:08:19

We want to move to a bigger home and have a dilemma between a beautiful 1930s home down a country lane, with about 100ft garden, still only about 12 minutes to work and 15 minutes to school, or a not very stylish 1980s house walking distance from school, smaller garden, but still decent size house. The first would really be the choice of my and hubby, but would rely on us to drive the children everywhere and the children would just have our garden to play in as the road is quite busy. On the housing estate there are likely to be other kids around to play with and as the children get older they could be more independent, getting a bus into town etc. The children are 3, 7 and 9 but when we move we want to stay put for a long time.
What would you choose?

puggymummy1 Sun 22-May-16 21:10:49

Having done both, I would always opt for non-estate now.

Buttwing Sun 22-May-16 22:16:54

I would hate to live on an estate. I would go for the first one.

Jeffjefftyjeff Sun 22-May-16 22:24:14

I have the latter but think the former is better. They won't be young forever. And sometimes the closeness of other children on estates can be a bit suffocating anyway. As teenagers a larger garden and bit of distance is great for parties/ coolness, also better to come back to when youve left home as a young adult (if this is a long term plan!!)

HerRoyalNotness Sun 22-May-16 22:25:43

The first, every time. I'd love not having overlooking neighbours and would like some chickens and a more rural feel

Didactylos Sun 22-May-16 23:43:17

the first one every time
space to entertain if you want to, privacy if you want it

are there links so we can all be nosy?

MeMySonAndl Mon 23-May-16 00:00:13

I have done both, it depends on the house/state/village:

House in the sticks: Beautiful place in a beautiful village, only 10 minutes from work. Nothing to do, most neighbours were either out all day or had little in common with us. There was no community. Transport was rubbish only a couple of busses in the morning and afternoon, if the car was down we were stuck. Friends didn't come often because they found it too far, it wasn't far but being outside of the city, it was perceived as far. I refer to the place as "the gilded cage". I have never felt more isolated in my whole life.

House in the city: The garden is tiny and overlooked, we can hear the neighbours, but... There is a community, we keep an eye on each other without living on each other pockets, we have loads in common. DS walks to his friends' houses, town, school and the house is always full with visitors. I hardly use the car nowadays, I ride to work and mostly everywhere.

The second one is my idea of heaven, but I guess that it would depend on what heaven means to you. Eg. I like cities and all that they can offer, my friend loves the countryside, having his horse nearby and spending hours in the garden. For him living in the sticks is his definition of heaven. For me... It is hell.

unlucky83 Mon 23-May-16 00:21:34

I would have thought I'd have gone for the first one - love the idea of privacy and lots of open space to keep chickens etc.
But actually I'd chose the sensible one...maybe I'm just lazy...
My youngest is now 9 and goes to school on her own. She has friends who pop round and she goes out to play. She can go to some activities on her own.
My eldest is 15 - also can go out with her friends without me needing to ferry her around.
I don't know if it is because of the age gap but after 10 yrs of the school run - DD1 could go on her own just as DD2 started Nursery - I am so glad I don't have to do it any more - it only took 10 -15 mins but I felt insanely jealous of the parent's of DD1's peers not having to do it anymore.
I work part time from home - I wave DD2 off, get tidy and get on with things. I do vaguely miss a walk in the fresh air when the weather is nice but not when it was raining or freezing.
And also I love not needing to organise entertainment for them...
I don't really socialise with my immediate neighbours - which suits me but I can go to a friend's for a chat and some wine (our DCs are friends too) and walk home...not worried about dangerous, dark country lanes.
And in Winter if you are on/near a bus route your roads get gritted.
And big gardens seem lovely but are a lot of work.
We are renovating a house (very slowly) about 2 miles from where we live now - it isn't down a country lane, is within walking distance to shops. It has a lovely big private garden but I have already realised it will be a lot of work (I just keep it vaguely under control at the moment and that takes a lot of time) and also that I will have to start taking DD2 to school again (there is a closer school but I don't want to move her for her last two years), picking DD1 up from friends at night, not really be able to walk home after a drink at my friends. I am actually getting cold feet and not sure I do want to move there any more...

Bowlersx5 Mon 23-May-16 06:51:51

1st house

2nd house

1st house been on the market for a while so should hopefully get about same price.

DH very excited about workshop at 1st house, the garage has been converted at the second but he's talking about converting it back (sigh) or replacing the conservatory with another garage.

Bowlersx5 Mon 23-May-16 06:54:00

Tried again for 2nd link

WordGetsAround Mon 23-May-16 06:56:52

Second link didn't work for me - this should be better

WordGetsAround Mon 23-May-16 06:57:17

Sorry - cross post!

BeauGlacons Mon 23-May-16 06:58:40

Second house is blocked.

FieryWill Mon 23-May-16 06:59:19

I'd go for the second one. We've done the lovely house in the sticks and it was great at first, but now DS is 15 it's a pain in the arse, and he hates not being able to just pop out whenever he wants.

poocatcherchampion Mon 23-May-16 07:02:04

Has house 1 got enough bedrooms?

Jinglebells99 Mon 23-May-16 07:05:16

The house in the country is much more attractive. But it only has two bedrooms upstairs and the other is downstairs which is a bit unusual, also would mean two of your children would have to share a bedroom. Amazing looking house and location for price, why do you think it hasn't sold already?

BeauGlacons Mon 23-May-16 07:06:29

Neither is commutable, ie, in walking distance of a mainline station.

Which is the mist desirable area
Where do you want to live most
Is either a compromise
How much money does each need spent on it in terms of annual maintenance
How keen are you both on gardening - house one is a big commitment there - looks like six/seven hours a week.

My inclination would be house 1 but you will be a taxi for ten years and I suspect it will cost you more.

Either way both houses would be close to a million here shock

unlucky83 Mon 23-May-16 07:07:43

Still think property 2 - for the reasons I stated before and its bigger! Although it is quite close to the M6 - is it noisy in the garden?
What is the big building near house 1? Is it a farm or industrial unit? And how close is it to the sea? That area iirc is pretty it a future flood risk?

SisterViktorine Mon 23-May-16 07:16:33

I don't think house 1 is big enough for you.

Beedoo123 Mon 23-May-16 07:19:56

We're having the same discussion at the mo... Think we'll go for the countryside option on the basis the children won't need ferrying around forever (although recognise when it comes to it.... it might feel like it!!)

Wildernesstips Mon 23-May-16 07:22:56

It depends on the location in the estate. I live on the edge of the estate and am not overlooked at all, and it is a real blessing that DS1 can get a bus from the estate to college and DS2 can walk to school. I have also lived in the sticks, although not a dream house, and was constantly worried about the road they had to cross to get to school.

tittysprinkles Mon 23-May-16 07:35:54

The first house whilst nice looks very remote. There looks like there is a lot of land to maintain too. You will be using your car a lot there I think.

The second house looks better located for the town but I am a bit suspicious of the lack of a floor plan given all the internal rearrangements that have gone on. The biggest concern for me though is that it's right next to the M6 so noise could be an issue.

Neither looks ideal - sorry that's not really helpful!

Nyama Mon 23-May-16 07:38:42

Check they aren't going to build in the fields at the back.

Blu Mon 23-May-16 07:40:40

The downstairs bedroom in the country would be a complete pain. Noise at night, use of bathroom etc. the answer would be to extend into the loft, maybe.

How is the journey to secondary schools? I look at the weekend my 14 yo DS has had, using buses and walking to go to 2 'extra curricular' activities and 3 social and I am SO pleased I do not have to be a taxi. Being in distance to walk to school adds much quality of life, IMO.

And country lanes are the worst for cycling on: speeding traffic in narrow lanes.

notagiraffe Mon 23-May-16 07:50:41

Difficult. Maybe you haven't found the right house yet. I love No1 and dislike No2, though it's functional.
But as DC grow older, we've found it so useful to live in a village with public transport links. Most of their friends aren't local children, as it happens. They outgrew that playing in the street with whoever's nearest thing ages ago. But it's good to be able to let them jump on a bus or train to meet up with friends from nearby towns and not have to ferry them everywhere. And they have their own interests - they spend half the weekend at clubs which again, they can get themselves to. It gives everyone some freedom. As well as meaning they can run errands to the local shops, stroll down to a cafe for an ice cream etc. All this stuff adds up to a fun, independent life for them.

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