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How do you tell whether or not you're making the right decision?

(20 Posts)
hiddenhome Wed 26-Feb-14 17:08:10

It looks like we're going for a new build tomorrow. We've looked at lots of houses over the last few weeks and virtually all of them need quite a lot of money spending on them.

We don't have the energy or the money to get a do-er upper and the new build represents good value for money and gives us what we need.

Trouble is, we don't know the area very well and we're feeling nervous confused

We're moving to get away from vile neighbours and the house also flooded the year before last. We just can't face being here any longer and need to get out as it's demoralising and depressing.

I'm just so worried about the new neighbours (after ten years of harassment and vandalism where we are) I'm a tad paranoid. We met one set of neighbours the other day - young couple, very pleasant and seemed sensible.

We need to decide tomorrow.

littlecrystal Wed 26-Feb-14 17:24:36

What does your gut feeling say?

hiddenhome Wed 26-Feb-14 17:40:28

To do it, but then my brain kicks in and keeps me in a state of questioning and anxiety.

I keep worrying that my desire to escape from this house is just making me feel drawn to anything that seems to fit the bill.

MillyMollyMama Wed 26-Feb-14 18:01:58

You cannot choose your neighbours - anywhere! So, you have to put this negative thought to one side and look at the house to see if it really suits you. If you have sold your current property you are in a good position, so you could move out and rent. However I think it is unlikely you will get awful neighbours on a new development. Likely to be the opposite in my view.

maggiemight Wed 26-Feb-14 18:05:30

YOu should go round in the evening and drive around the area, sit in the car in the street.

WE looked at a lovely property once, went back in the evening and the road was like a Tesco car park, cars everywhere, not enough garageroom or parking.

I agree it is unlikely that you will get bad neighbours on a new build. Not sure why I say that, just presume bad neighbours stay put.

struggling100 Wed 26-Feb-14 18:08:13

I don't think it's a question of 'how you know'. More like 'how you are'. Some people when buying a new house are tremendously excited and find the whole experience wonderful. Others worry like crazy and think of all the negatives that can happen. Some (like me) swing in between excitement and anxiety!! There is no right or wrong way to approach it emotionally.

Given that you've had such a stressful experience with your current house, I am not at all surprised that anxieties are foremost in your mind. I would be amazed if it were any other way. However, that doesn't mean that your new experience will be bad: indeed, it sounds like you're getting rid of an awful lot of negatives with your current place.

A few years ago, I moved away from the world's worst neighbours and felt absolutely terrified. My new house, neighbours etc are all lovely! It can work out for the best. Hang in there.

Wafflesnaffler Wed 26-Feb-14 18:15:17

We recently looked at a house on a road we weren't familiar and comfortable with. I checked it out via: (demographic info - if you have no idea what kind of people might live there, house info etc) (to see if the road gets reports of vandalism etc) (for a handy interactive map telling you what crimes have gone on in the road/area by month)

We also just went up to a local policeman outside the station and asked him what the road was like (answer was it's perfectly fine - no worse or better than average), and asked the mums at the school gates (answer was they knew several people who lived happily there).

Unfortunately no way of checking for general rude/mean/unpleasant neighbours, so for that it's a case of what MillyMollyMama said!

HaveToWearHeels Wed 26-Feb-14 18:35:24

We bought a new build in 2007 moved in in 2008. My experience here is one of community. In our little close we all moved in with in 6 months of each other, so everyone was in the same boat so to speak, no one was a new comer (we all were), there we no cliquey groups already formed.
Fast forward 5 years, was all know each other by first names. We all take each others bins in, help out where we can with lending tools etc, keep an eye on houses when someone goes away. Two of use have kids the same age so they get invited to each others parties or go to the playground opposite our houses together. However we are not in each others pockets, which is nice.

ShoeWhore Wed 26-Feb-14 20:11:55

10 years ago I was worrying about whether we were doing the right thing buying our house. (more about the garden being too small, kitchen a bit dark) Now I adore it and would be devastated to leave.

It's really hard to tell with neighbours, isn't it? When we moved in here next door had 3 teenage boys but we have been disturbed by them literally twice in 10 years - otherwise we never heard a thing (partly thanks to the solid old walls!) Some good advice upthread about checking places out. You sound like you've had a really stressful time OP - it's only natural to feel a bit anxious about a move after that.

Good luck!

hiddenhome Wed 26-Feb-14 20:27:46

Oh, thank you so much for all these positive replies smile. You've all made me feel more positive.

Thanks for the links too, I'll take a look at them now.

Where we're living now, virtually all of the people (older) have lived here since the houses were built in 1961. Even if the parents have died or gone into care, the children of those people are now moving in shock The place feels like Royston Vasey. I long to be with new people and fellow outsiders grin

CrapBag Wed 26-Feb-14 21:32:24

Is this the fence painting neighbours? grin

I always wondered how that turned out. Or I have got the wrong OP and now look like a tit.

NoArmaniNoPunani Wed 26-Feb-14 21:34:09

I thought OP was the fence wars poster too.

systemsmalfunction Wed 26-Feb-14 23:06:25

Checkmyarea was totally wrong for me. Said I live in a poorer area with low paid jobs when in fact a GP lives one side and a computer programmer the other. Saying that I'm skint and low paid!

beaglesaresweet Thu 27-Feb-14 00:28:17

Waffles, just had a look on police site - wish I hadn't! really would put you off most of the areas! I'm particular worried anbout 'Criminal damage and arson' category as seems to be three around that street. What the heck does that mean - actual arson thrown into houses? can't they deal with it? I also checked a supposedly nicer middle class area of town, and again same crops up. Do you know whether they actually mean arson in every case, or crimilnal damage is juts automatically grouped with it. Is it ok to contact police to ask them? Also it doesn't exactlt sound good when it states 'still looking for the culprit' when it seemes to have happend more 3 times in one month around the same block of streets! confused

beaglesaresweet Thu 27-Feb-14 00:29:20

sorry for errors

beaglesaresweet Thu 27-Feb-14 00:32:14

oh and forgot to say - in the nicer area there is more cases of burglary, though when I asked vendors on that street when viewing, they said 'not at all'! (well there was one on that street but at least 7 in close proximity in a month shock)! Still at least you can install an alarm for that, but wtf would you do about criminal damage/arson? Now I'm terrified to be buying.

ToFollowJulie Thu 27-Feb-14 06:17:26

I just looked at the police website as well. I noticed that there is an incident of 'criminal damage and arson' on our street. In that case a garage burned down. It was later found to be an electrical fault, but it's still there as possible arson. Hope that's slightly reassuring, beagles.

Wafflesnaffler Thu 27-Feb-14 07:23:49

Sorry beagles, I didn't mean to scare you! There were a bunch of "anti-social behaviours" happening reasonably regularly on a close which branches off the road I was interested in (close is right opposite the house). Hence why we then asked a local policeman and some mums! They all said it was fine - I think any road will have something or other happening nearby every now and then. Surprising though isn't it! If it looks really regular I think it's fine to ask at the local police station or when you see someone on patrol - in my opinion, one of the things they're there for is to help with these worries.

Wafflesnaffler Thu 27-Feb-14 07:45:31

To systemsmalfunction, I've found checkmyarea to be generally quite accurate. It's helpful if you really don't know the area at all as it gives a guide to property size, whether homes are owned, rented, council houses or housing association. As for having an "E" classification, this can just mean there are lot of pensioners in the area or having some council houses or housing association houses, but doesn't mean it won't be a nice area to live in. Nothing is better than local knowledge of course though!

beaglesaresweet Thu 27-Feb-14 12:53:46

thanks ToFollow - so it was not vandalism? just something to do with the weather/storms? Otoh if people don' look after their houses (i.e. ancient electrics) that's also not so great. But I'm much more scared of vandalism of course, especially as I'd be sometimes on my own in the house, and sometimes leave the house empty when I'm away. I wonder if installing CCTV would put such criminals off? (there is already alarm system in the house). I just don't know whether to discount this area(three such incidents in one month nearby - what if there is some crazed arson criminal around?) or should I try to ignore it.

Would you be seriously put off? I doubt it that I'll see police there when I'm there viewing, I though maybe to e-mail (there is email on that website). I will ask vendors but it's not in their interests to tell me I think- unless it WAS juts a fault.

Waffles, anto social behaviour I could live with as it's pretty much everywhere, any area in any proximity to city/town/pub! grin As far as it's not unusually high number.Is it really just that and no other crimes? then you aer lucky. In the area I'm looking it's around 200 a month(january) though it's not a small area and is a small city), but I'm wondering now whether I should look at quieter corners, even if it gets worying a few blocks away..<confused>

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