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New kitchen or pay off some of the mortgage?

(79 Posts)
reastie Tue 12-Mar-13 09:19:57

I'm in the very lucky position of having inherited a bit of money. We have been planning on spending it on a new kitchen, windows and new roof (it would at a push cover all of this). We have spent months planning the kitchen/choosing specs etc. It's at the point of booking it in to be done in a couple of months time.

DH announces to me last night in an argument about money if it was up to him we wouldn't buy a new kitchen, we'd buy the windows (as they are absolutely rotten through) and spend the rest paying a lump sum on his mortgage for his property he bought before we lived together which he now rents out (rent doesn't cover mortgage though). I was shock as he's never even mentioned this before and I now have no idea what to do for the best and would appreciate some advice on this (if there's a better topic for this please let me know).

If we paid off some of his mortgage it would be about 2 years worth of payments, meaning if we then carried on as we are it would be paid off in around 5 years (DH is 35, I'm 31). We are very lucky in that we own our house outright. We don't have a huge income, DH is a gardener and I'm a PT teacher. I looked upon it as this will be the only time ever we will have a decent amount of money, we need a new kitchen so it's a great opportunity for us to get it done. Our current kitchen is over 20 years old and falling apart, but is in just about working order.

If we didn't get the kitchen redone we would still have to have some work done to the house with the inheritance (bring the washing machine downstairs from the bedroom where it shakes the whole floor upstairs, get a hard floor for the dining room where the carpet is ruined with DDs spillages) but I guess this would be on the short-medium term length with a view that the money we'd save from not paying the martgage/getting rental income from 5 years time would mean we could save for a new kitchen within the next 10 years.

I have no idea what to do now, and I realise I'm very lucky to be where I am, I just want to spend the money wisely. It's my Grandmothers life savings and I need to choose the best thing to spend it on. I can see where DH is coming from but I guess part of me sees his old house as 'his' and not mine.

fedupwithdeployment Tue 12-Mar-13 15:32:54

My inclination would be to go for the maintenance and then kitchen, but perhaps go for a slightly more budget version.

If he only has 7 years of a modest mortgage left, he may not actually be able to pay off that much. My DH had a large redundancy payment recently, and while we have used that to pay off some mortgage, we are restricted to 10% pa.

Perhaps a £5k chunk of mortgage might be a compromise?

DiskFix Tue 12-Mar-13 15:45:02

If he inherited the money instead of you, what would you expect him to do with it? smile
It's normal to have different ideas about money. Open a bottle of wine, talk it through and find an agreement. Don't let this ruin your relationship.

reastie Tue 12-Mar-13 18:02:44

Disk if it was the other way round and he wanted to spend all of it on his mortgage then I'd be fine with that.

wendy he has more savings than me, but they are both dwindling alot with works done to the house over the past few years (we've had things like new water tank etc done. Lots of little bits).

I'm thinking to do our house improvements and if there's any left give it to DH for his mortgage but there won't be . We'll look at cheaper kitchen units and other ways to lower the cost. He's fine with how I've decided to spend it, think it's just different ideas and upbringings.

thanks so much for all of your perspectives.

auntpetunia Tue 12-Mar-13 20:02:39

We had a similar situation a good number of years ago and we did house repairs first then paid chunk off mortgage, you're often only allowed to pay off 10% in any year

BackforGood Tue 12-Mar-13 20:26:19

I agree with most - prioritise the re-roofing, and replacing the windows, and sort out any residue damp problems, then have a look at what money you've got and reassess at that point.
Generally I'm all for paying lump sums off the mortgage, but I think it's not what I'd do in this case. It suonds like your kitchen is really in need of redoing, it's not just a fancy idea, but I have to agree with everyone else, that sounds like an awful lot of money for a kitchen (even with new floor coverings elsewhere). Maybe there will be money for a less expensive kitchen, and some to throw at the mortgage ? It sounds like you are going to be the owners of 2 properties without a mortgage between them long before you are both 40 anyway, so that's a fantastic position to be in - surely the rent not covering the mortgage in the 'to let' house isn't that crucial if you have no mortgage on your current home ? Most people expect to be paying out something for housing.
The other point is, kitchens do 'date'. We had a new kitchen 9 years ago - spent a lot on it, thinking we would have it for the next 20-25 years. EVen now (although there was nothing 'high fashion' at the time) it is looking a bit 'dated'. If I had my time again, I'd spend a bit less and replace it in 8 or 9 years. Maybe doing that will leave you some for the mortgage?

Thingiebob Tue 12-Mar-13 20:33:33

Definitely the re-roofing, windows and damp problems. These are all issues which will cost more money over time, unless fixed.

Once done, anything left over could go towards kitchen improvements.

herhonesty Tue 12-Mar-13 20:35:26

How much is your residential property worth?

Cantbelieveitsnotbutter Tue 12-Mar-13 20:39:24

I'm with you i think inheritance is money your gps have worked bloody hard to leave you. Not money for bills ... Unless you have no choice obviously.

flatbread Tue 12-Mar-13 20:49:46

Hmm, you said your current home is mortgage free and you got it when your parents moved out. Did you/dh pay the market rate or was it gifted to you?

I cannot understand why your dh feels your inheritance should go towards paying off a mortgage in his sole name.

reastie Wed 13-Mar-13 06:37:17

Her I have no idea how much this property is worth. I'd guess £350 - 400k very roughly.

Flat my parents gave it to us. Yes, I know we're lucky! It's in our joint names.

Back that's interesting re: your kitchen. We've tried really hard to pick a traditional kitchen in the hope it won't date too much. We got quotes from homebase and howdens but tbh they weren't alot cheaper (and we're not picking the expensive ranges or anything). Alot of the money is going on workmen as the walls need plastering, heavy tiled floor needs taking up, floorboards in dining room need preparing before the hard lino floor goes on, electrics need alot of work etc. It's not 'just' a case of sticking a kitchen in and that's it confused

HalleLouja Wed 13-Mar-13 06:48:29

I would get your kitchen done. I am in a similar position though I have a massive kitchen its not costing me anything like that.

flatbread Wed 13-Mar-13 06:49:55

Reastie, if your parents gifted it to you, why is it not in your name only? Especially as your 'd' h has kept his flat in his own name?

He sounds quite entitled, tbh, if he is sulking that you are not spending your inheritance on his flat. Especially since he already has a huge gift from your family to the tune of £200k

reastie Wed 13-Mar-13 07:42:42

My parents asked me if I wanted it in my name or joint names, I said joint hmm . DHs house he sees as his pension (and so I guess mine too). He isn't entitled at all, he's put no pressure on me to put the money on his mortgage, he just put it out there for me to consider. Tbh he finds the whole thing about my parents giving us this house quite odd - he says even though it's in his name and he owns it it will 'never feel like his home' as he hasn't paid for it. He sees it as somewhere he lives until he dies but not his home <weirdo>. He said he went into his old house last week (tenants are changing) and it still felt like his home. He has this thing about having to work for his money/house etc and being given things like that he finds hard to swallow. It's his upbringing I guess.

HalleLouja Wed 13-Mar-13 07:45:31

Maybe he could put his "home" in both your names.

Glittertwins Wed 13-Mar-13 07:51:45

Get your immediate home sorted first. Getting the windows replaced now will prevent damage from damp not to mention heat being wasted (and money) in damp draughts.
He needs to either sort out his "own" mortgage and rental so it starts at least paying for itself as a minimum or sell it. It is no good to view as a pension if it is draining money away from you both.

flatbread Wed 13-Mar-13 10:37:35

Idealism meets reality

Idealism - dh doesn't care about money.
Reality - dh sounds like a manipulative fucker. Happy to have his name put on his partner's house deeds ( no one held a gun to his head to do so), but carefully leaves his own home in his own name. No sharing there

And when OP gets an inheritance, has the chupazh to say that it should be used to pay of his mortgage.

If you have seperate bank accounts and finances, why are you so eager to have him on your house deeds and involved in decisions regarding your inheritance?

You sound like a giver and he is a taker. You could be sitting pretty with assets and cash of £500k in your name/ trust. A financially independent woman.

BobbiFleckmann Wed 13-Mar-13 10:45:50

the first thing you want to do is put the rental into joint names, or xfer your residential property into yours alone. He's being a twat.
However - what about a £20k kitchen and £5k onto the mortgage on the rental property (on condition that it goes into joint names)?

AllBellyandBoobs Wed 13-Mar-13 11:00:05

Not sure why the DH is getting such a hard time here, OP has already said he hasn't demanded the money be spent on anything. I'm probably wrong but does it matter whose name is on what if they're married anyway?

I'd do any repairs on your home first, then kitchen and then if there is any left go on a nice holiday smile

greenfolder Wed 13-Mar-13 11:04:24

go with your plan.

its your forever home. it will make you happy. you are asset rich but cash poor. the kithchen will need to be done some time.

i can see where your husband is coming from re the house- but maybe you could show him that doing it up together/planning the renovations is a way of him feeling like it is his home.

greenfolder Wed 13-Mar-13 11:09:20

i would add though that £25k is a huge amount for a kitchen. i do think its easy to think that a nice kitchen has to be vastly expensive. ours is a really decent size and cost less than £12k including moving a wall, hacking back to brick and replastering, new ceiling, loads of units and neff appliances. used local builder, howdens units and john lewis for appliances. maybe you could do this and keep around £10k in savings as a back up for void periods on the rental?

specialknickers Wed 13-Mar-13 11:13:22

I was going to say kitchen, because there are tax implications to paying off the mortgage on the renal property... But £20k+ on a kitchen sounds a bit expensive to me (just did ours for around 3k, including new flooring and all new Bosch appliances). I would do your research to make sure you're adding that amount of value to the house before spending that amount of money.

I'd definitely do the maintenance though. You will never regret putting in new windows and a new roof!

specialknickers Wed 13-Mar-13 11:17:20

Sorry, meant to add that expensive "dream" kitchens are very often style statements that date quickly. You could spend your inheritance on one, then want something totally different in 10 years when it's gone out of fashion.

flatbread Wed 13-Mar-13 11:49:35

I'm feeling so down about the whole thing. DH is being really really rude and moody with me today re: money. We need extra money to pay various bills and he's asked me for the money. I said I'll happily move the money into his account but it's coming from my savings not my inherited money and for some reason he's getting really cross about the fact I'm saying I won't spend my inheritance on bills

The kitchen is not the issue. Your 'd'hs attitude is. He should be happy for you to spend your inheritence as you like.

There are huge alarm bells going off:
A) He is on your house deeds, gaining £200k personally, while keeping his house in his sole name
B) Suggesting you use your inheritance to pay his mortgage, even though it makes little financial sense for you. But is a direct transfer of wealth to him
C) Being sloppy with his own finances - if he bought the house ages ago, there is no reason why the rent should not cover the mortgage. Either he is lying and spending money on himself or he is pretty useless at money and investments
D) For making you feel emotionally guilty about having independent money
E) If the house is a gift from your parents, he should be paying the repairs and bills to contribute his fair share, instead of asking you to cough up your inheritance

Tbh, he sounds financially manipulative and controlling, to say the very least...while pretending otherwise

Pannacotta Wed 13-Mar-13 12:10:28

Sorry OP but am inclined to agree with flatbread's post above.
I would take some indepdendent financial advice in your shoes.
Have you looked at local joiners/small independen companies for your ktichen? The 25K does sound a lot even with the building work...

Mutley77 Wed 13-Mar-13 12:30:32

Have scanned through but not read all the replies - sorry if am repeating someone.

First - I think there isn't a huge advantage to you financially of paying off the mortgage versus spending the money on your own home now.

Second - and much more important IMO - is that it is inheritance money. In my mind that should be spent on things that benefit your life in a positive way as a way of remembering your lost relative. I had an inheritance from my grandfather a couple of years ago and spent it on two really nice holidays, some decent bedroom furniture for DD (that we wouldn't have bought otherwise but will last her for at least ten years I would think) and a couple of other things. Some might say that is frivolous but to me I wanted to enjoy the money by spending it on things that my family and I would not have been able to do otherwise - one of the holidays we went on was by far our most relaxing and best family holiday so far and I am really grateful to my grandpa for enabling that to happen for us.

My DH isn't really bothered about finances so wouldn't really question what I chose to spend it on. However I can see your DH's POV to some degree so I hope he comes round to your way of thinking.

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