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living in a village, what about teens?

(29 Posts)
givemeaclue Wed 20-Jul-11 17:10:22

OUrhome search continues got 7 moreviewing for this weekend. If you live in a village is it a nightmare for teens
(Ours are still pre school but am thinking ahead) e.g village with primary but not secondary school, one shop one pub. I grew up in city so could get to shops, cinema, pool, friends houses etc without need for lifts . WE are moving due to issues with primary schools where we live, don't want to end up with more problems in years to come

!

Fimbo Wed 20-Jul-11 17:18:02

I live in a village but we are quite luck as we are only 6 miles out from a city. The bus comes 4 times an hour and we also have a park & ride site about 1 mile away. Dd (13) goes out with her friends most weekends and they will either get the service bus or one of the parents drives them to the p & r and someone collects them later.

We also the three tiered system so a first, junior and high school and a private girls school. But the high school serves outlying villages which can be a bit of a nusiance if my dd wants to meet up with other friends from school who don't live here. We also have a youth club,lots of sports clubs, all variants of the scout movement, after school clubs, Tesco express, small Boots, butcher, library, drs, dentist, private nursery school, kebab shop, chinese, post office, 3 churches, gift shop, computer repair shop, 2 hairdressers, 2 pubs and a happy shopper. It is classed as a village but from that list there sounds more like a small town!

AMumInScotland Wed 20-Jul-11 17:27:19

We live in a village - post office/shop, pub, church, primary school (3 composite classes). There are buses, but not that often.

It has meant a lot of lifts for DS, and driving lessons much earlier than we might have bothered with in a city. You do end up having to be more involved in what they are doing, because they can't just pop on a convenient bus to get places.

On the plus side, we have a house we could never have had in a city!

rocksox Thu 21-Jul-11 13:23:31

Mine are still pre-school as well but we're in a village - pub, church, excellent primary school and one bus every 2 hours (!) into town.

Yes, you drive everywhere and I am sure I will end up ferrying the kids everywhere as they grow up, particularly when they move on to secondary school in town.

Having said that, there are lots of other children their age here so I am confident they will grow up with a local circle of friends as well. That is my observation of the current crop of village teens - lovely bunch that seem to get on and even get involved in village life. My concern would be if you are looking at a village inhabited by older generations with no other children around for them to grow up with.

givemeaclue Sun 24-Jul-11 16:08:32

Thanks everyone for your feedback, much appreciated. We viewed several houses in various villages at weekend, the villages were lovely and bearing your advice in mind I think just accepting the ferrying about was the way forward. But the houses were no good - back to the drawing board!

Hassled Sun 24-Jul-11 16:11:34

DH grew up in a tiny village and absolutely hated it. He got a motorbike at the earliest opportunity so he could visit mates without needing parental lifts everywhere.

But because the area was so rural all his school friends were in the same position - bussed in to the nearest town for school - so he was never an oddity. And it hasn't scarred him - though since adulthood he's always been in a city!

SecretSquirrels Sun 24-Jul-11 16:59:20

We live in a tiny village with limited bus service, no shops and no pub.School has always been a bus ride away. It has meant that the DCs are rather sheltered and not very streetwise. When they were little it was idyllic and they had safety and freedom but now they are teens I regret it. It's not just that there is a lot of ferrying around but that I feel they are isolated from their friends. With hindsight I would have chosen a small market size town, big enough for a couple of pubs, takeaways, shops and a school.

HairBearz Sun 24-Jul-11 17:33:37

I live in a small village, no shop but a pub. Bus service is infrequent and unreliable, and it is a nightmare. I can't move quick enough! I was in a bigger village before with amenities, but still felt stuck. Give me towns any day.

HairBearz Sun 24-Jul-11 17:34:15

Meant to say, I have teen dd and she hates it.

Marne Sun 24-Jul-11 17:35:59

We live in a large village, 2 primary schools, a couple shops and 2 pubs. My step children have grown up here (they are now 11,15 and 18), my dc's are still young but i don't see a problem. I might have to drive them around a little bit more as they get older but its not a problem.

Cattleprod Sun 24-Jul-11 17:41:37

When I was that age, I found that the teens I knew who lived in villages were far more likely to smoke, have underage sex and dabble in drugs than the town teens, simply because there was nothing else to do.

HairBearz Sun 24-Jul-11 17:51:44

there isn't even that in our village! there are no other kids, well no one she knows

JumpJockey Sun 24-Jul-11 21:46:28

I grew up in a village which was great as a kid (fields, woods etc to play in during the holidays) but then went to school in town half an hour's bus ride away, which meant friends all over the place. Dad got used to being a taxi, then when I was older, I spent a fortune on taxi rides back home after parties/nights out. If the bus service is ok it's not too bad but our last bus was at 10.30...

MoreBeta Sun 24-Jul-11 21:50:50

I grew up on a farm outside a village. At age 11 I was sent to boarding schol and just loved it. I hated going home as I was totally isolated and never saw anyone in holidays.

I know quite a few people with teenagers who live in villages. They basically become a taxi service for their teenagers.

startail Sun 24-Jul-11 23:23:04

DDs and her friends all live in out of the way places, mum taxis it's not a problem and it's nice to know what they're are.
Doesn't seem odd to me, high school was in the next town, best mate was 9 miles away. My another friend 3 miles cycle.
I've lived in a city, I hated it, you never know how long it's going to take to get anywhere. Too much traffic, too many people.

Alix81 Mon 01-Aug-11 13:51:15

I grew up in a tiny village.. no school, no pub just a church and a little shop (that closed many years ago) bus service was mostly reliable but had to walk half a mile to the bus stop, bus ran every hour. We had to rely on bus or parents to drive us to town.

Saying all that dosen't paint a great picture but I loved it there. Im always looking at the houses for sale there hoping one will come up that we could afford as I'd move back in a flash!

Oh and in reply to what cattleprod said - I never smoked, had underage sex or did drugs! instead we went for bike rides, camped in local farmers fields, built tree houses and went for long walks.

Bonsoir Mon 01-Aug-11 13:53:03

I think you end up driving everywhere. I love living right in a city where children get a bus/metro pass from 10/11 and can take themselves around!

hatwoman Mon 01-Aug-11 14:19:54

I was a teen in a village (and loved it). and after years of urban living am back in a village with a 9 and 11 year old.

My key bit of advice would be that you really need to pick somewhere on a a bus route. It doesn't need to be frequent (it won't be, believe me), just as long as there are some. I lived about 12 miles from a city - with about 5 buses a day - which was just about enough to get me a weekend fix of Top Shop and the cinema - without having to rely on my mum. There is no way I would move to a place that had no buses.

If, like us, the kids go to a school which serves several villages, they will obviously make friends with kids from other villages and, ime, bus routes - ok to get into town, aren't so great for other villages - and this'll account for quite a bit of ferrying - but much of it will be quick - 10 mins each way. Ferrying to activities is a big feature of our lives with a 9 and 11 year old, but we take it on the chin - and it's not the worst thing in the world, compared with the benefits of village life.

I had a good group of friends in the village and mostly we were very independent. The kids/teens I know now in our village are a good bunch - quite involved in village life - they interact well with adults and seem pretty responsible. There is plenty of village-based sport (sadly mainly for boys though) and, in our case, lots of outdoorsy opportunities - climbing, mountain biking, horse riding.

The big fear is irresponsible driving on bendy lanes by 17 year olds (mainly boys). And the other consideration is the staggering cost of putting a 17 year old on your insurance. Apparently you're looking at 4 figures.

hatwoman Mon 01-Aug-11 14:22:33

rumour has it that no less than 3 of our local sixth formers have tractors. extremely cheap insurance and you can drive them on the road aged 16 grin

Cleverything Mon 01-Aug-11 14:26:23

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hatwoman Mon 01-Aug-11 15:08:34

I agree that you need to accept that bus services may be cut. but it still makes sense to chose somewhere that currently has buses rather than somewhere that already has none.

mollymole Mon 01-Aug-11 15:13:07

lived in small village until son went into secondary education and it was brilliant, but as they get older they do not want mum to ferry them around everywhere and the older kids in the village did get up to a lot of mischief as there was nothing to do.

there were no buses outside of school runs and the main problem was that
son would be asked to stay over for tea at a friends house ( school is already 10+ miles away) this friend may live at the other side of the area and be at least 20 miles away - no public transport - child is on school sports team , bus gets back to school at around 7.00pm - no way of getting home without parental pick up

it goes on - so you do really need to have at least a couple of buses outside school bus runs and at weekends

PanicMode Tue 02-Aug-11 12:59:05

I went to boarding school and we lived in a hamlet in the middle of nowhere - so getting anywhere was a total pain - my parents basically had to drive everywhere because my friends were from a huge geographical area. I used to ride a lot, read a lot, play tennis, and go to a lot of house parties (to which parents would have to drive to and fro). Although I would love to live in the country and have horses again, given that we have four children, we've decided that we'd rather live in town so that they can get the bus, or walk everywhere as although they are only little at the moment, there is quite enough ferrying around to various parties/clubs/events already!

fruitshootsandheaves Tue 02-Aug-11 13:01:48

We live in a village with only a pub. We need to book the bus 2 days in advance if we want it to stop in the village.
We only actually live about 3 miles from town but I am forever ferrying DS and DD (15 and 17) into town, which is a pain as they never go or return at the same times! Can't wait for dd to pass her driving test!

lechatnoir Tue 02-Aug-11 21:58:20

We moved to a village a few years ago with pre-school children and love it now but plan on moving into town when secondary school looms so the children can have a bit more independence as they grow up, we're nearer school & we don't spend our days being a taxi!

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