HOMEWORK NIGHTMARE with dd Y4

[lexcat]

We have always struggled with literacy homework, but it had got better with age.

It's all gone out the window tonight tried for the last 1/2 hour and have 1/2 a sentence. She gone wrong with spelling three times and has just gone to pieces each time. They are simple word she knows but because of the mood she's in it all going wrong.

How do you get the homework done, it's only meant to take 15 mins and it ends up taking most of the evening.

[Tortington]

leave it

if it comes to a point where it is ruining home life

is it worth it

just leave it

[LadyMuck]

You make a note for the teacher explaining the length of time you have spent on it. You do not make your dd's life a misery because of it.

That said, if there is an attitude/mood issue, then you do need to address that. I wouldn't necessarily choose homework as my battle but Y4 is an age where they do need to start realising that they need to find ways of managing their moods.

[lexcat]

The idea if me talking to her teacher puts her in a panic. Literacy is a problem at school with her often missing part of her play times to finish.

It's funny she's had some food then went off in a strop and now has just written one sentence. Moaned at me and has taken her self off again to do some more. I think it was me suggesting I send a note to her teacher about our struggle.

That's great for tonight as she will probably finish it now but I just can't cope with the constant battle. It's not like to be so moody and grumpy. Literacy homework is our worst battle we have, maths homework is not normally a problem but she likes maths.

[danthe4th]

Do not turn it into a battle ground now otherwise you are setting yourself up for a fight when it comes to high school. I was quite hard on my children I sent them away to get on with their homework, I would check it later and if they haven't done it or can't I wouldn't help as such because I felt that the teacher needed to realise where she needed extra support. I now have 2 dd's at high school who get on with the homework on their own. I am dreading ds in yr3 bringing home homework as he still can't read and write but I'm not doing his homework for him.

[LIZS]

Is the homework literacy or spelling ? tbh I'd let her misspell if it a piece of writing and leave it after 15 mins .

[mimsum]

we had this with ds2 last year (also y4) - it got to the stage when I dreaded the whole thing and the spectre of homework haunted the whole week

what turned it round for us was bribery incentives - ds loves lego, so for every week he did his homework without a fuss (which was the crucial bit) he got a lego minifig. When that started working well, he started earning 1 point a week and when he got to 5 points he got a lego game. I also got him doing a little bit (10 mins) a day so he got used to it

[seeker]

I really wouldn't let homework be any sort of problem at this age - there is lots of research to say that it has absolutely no impact at all on the learning of primary children. I would say to her "Sit down and do your best for [however long it's supposed to take] then we'll stop. It would be wonderful if you cound do what it says on the sheet, but if you can't you can't" Then put the timer on and leave it. It's just like food - don't comment on what has or has not been completed - just pack up the books and go on to some other activity. Once the emotion is taken out of the situation, she might find it easier.

But I would talk to the teacher without her knowledge and see if you can come up with some strategies to speed her up a bit.

[lexcat]

Thought she was doing homework in fact she was doodling on a srcap piece of paper we have about 4 sentences. I dodn't worry about the spelling that was her noticing she had mis-spelt the words.

She's put it on hold till tommorrow night as she wants it to be finished before she hands it in (got till friday). Maths tommorrow then she busy after school Wednesday and Thursday. Going to have to talk to her teacher so she understands the battle and that she had a half hearted go.

[thedolly]

I set the timer (on the oven) for 15mins once DD has her things ready. She stops at the end of this time (I leave her to it) and I write a note at the bottom saying that she has spent x mins (sometimes she finishes sooner).

Agree with others that it is not worth you or DD fretting about.

[mmrsceptic]

agree with custy, leave it

there comes a time when homework is important, that time is not now

you don't want to set up an years-long battleground

ask her to read a book instead