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Changing schools...will 9 year old DD be OK...?

(6 Posts)
misspollysdolly Mon 08-Jun-09 22:30:18

Has anyone else taken the decision either:

To change schools as their DD/DS enters year 5

or

To change from Private to State system...?

As we are doing both...just wondered what anybody's experiences of either or both of these might have been.

She's had a pretty rough year at her school with bullying and now pretty awful treatment by teachers/headteacher (and no, I don't think I'm being too precious - the school are not really responding to any issues of bullying - three other parents have told us of the same things happening to their children since we have made this decision...) I am certain we have made the right decision (not to mention the money we will now be saving smile) but just wondered what experience tells you we should anticipate. Pretty confident that the new school will welcome and care for her.

faraday Mon 08-Jun-09 22:49:02

I moved DS1 aged just 10 and in Y5 last weekend to a new school. It's a secondary catchment move and the new school (and MN for that matter!) persuaded me that moving him with half a term to go was a good idea so he'd have his feet under the desk learning the ropes before it gets 'serious' in Y6.

He's not the most gregarious of kids but I have to say the move SO FAR (only a week in!) has been seamless.

One thing to bear in mind is that state schools HAVE to deal with bullying AND they do have vast amounts of experience in integrating all sorts of kids as of course most schools have a fair turnover of DCs.

I think your DC's age will help too- I imagine it'd be harder to move from private to state the older a DC is as there's no doubt about it, many state schools do do things differently than state schools! Especially private schools who don't have the capacity to deal with something as fundamental as bullying.

I think that give it a term and you won't look back.

Good luck!

admylin Tue 09-Jun-09 11:53:42

I've just moved to a new town and my 9 year old dd is doing fine. Within a few days she was playing and chatting to her new friends as if she had been there since Year 1! And she is actually a quiet girl so not even very outgoing. The whole school has really welcomed my dc (also a ds in Year 6) and the only thing they didn't like up to now was being introduced to everyone is assembaly!

misspollysdolly Tue 09-Jun-09 13:45:55

OK, so now I feel likea complete crapweasle - DD been sent home from school (the 'current' one, not the new one) with 'mysterious' headache, but is now breaking her heart because she is going to miss all her friends. (Bear in mind these are the friends that she falls in and out of friendship with at a moment's notice - she's on an even keel at the moment but it's been a turbulent year as far a friendships go). Feel awful that we've made this decision and am now dreading the next few weeks til the end of term in which I guess these outbursts will get more frequent or more intense. Please say positive things to me, so I don't start doubting our decision. Feel like the most horrible Mum in the world. sad

scarletlilybug Wed 10-Jun-09 09:46:26

I moved dd's school at 8 for similar reasons for you (although we moved from state to private).

She settled in unbelievably quickly and is much, much happier now. If your dd is unhappy where she is, I don't think you should have anything to fear.

Could she have a "taster" day at the new school? That might help her, so she doesn't feel as if she's goiung into a class of strangers.

Apart from that, I would say that if you act as if there is nothing to worry about, it should help her to develop the same attitude. I remember telling myy dd "It's natural to be a bit nervous, but I'm sure you'll be just fine". And she was.

sanae Tue 16-Jun-09 17:51:12

we have moved 3 times because of job moves. DD(now 10) not the most gregarious of children but has settled each time and made new friends very quickly. The last move was into the end of Y4, so very similar to your DD. I would say go ahead, don't worry, she will be so much more happy not having to put up with bullying.

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