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any advice for making a change of school easy?

(9 Posts)
hatwoman Wed 24-Sep-08 22:10:07

we're moving in January and dds will be going to a very different type of school. at the moment they go to a surburban london school - 60 kids a year, lots of different lunchtime and after school activities, people from different backgrounds (albeit with a suburban middle class bent). They will be going to a rural village school with less than 60 kids altogether. it's economically mixed but whiter than white, and while it does some great stuff it just can;t sustain the same choice of clubs and activities.

dd2 is very sociable and makes friends easily. dd1 - who I;m more worried about - paired off with her best friend in reception and they are always together. she's quite shy, can be insanely jealous of her more gregarious sister, and this can manifest itself in the form of showing off. Having said that when I see her at school she does seem to chat and get on with people - although never gets invited to play (apart from with her best friend)

the new school has invited them to come for a whole day some time before Christmas. My mum, a teacher, thinks this could be too much - just kind of leaving them as the new girls/visitors for a single day - and I kind of see her point. But could it make the first day of term easy? so any tips re helping them socially?

and then there's the academic aspect - should I ask the two schools to talk to each other about dds? to get an idea of where they are academically and what topics they've done? or is that a big no no? If I turned up with some examples of their work, or their school reports would that be pushy or helpful?

I'm aware that we're asking a lot of dds by uprooting them (although they want to go) and I want to make this move a really happy experience for them

mylittlemonsters Wed 24-Sep-08 22:19:56

I hate to mention it but the other site <<makes sure no one is looking>> has some good advice on this.

see hereclick here

hatwoman Wed 24-Sep-08 22:24:33

shock wink sneaks off to take a peak...

JohnnyTwoHats Wed 24-Sep-08 22:26:06

My dd (5.5, year 1) has just started a new school in a new area and went to visit for the day just before the end of last term.

I had a lump in my throat as I waved her off but she was FINE.

I appreciate that children are all different and my DD is fairly outgoing; however, the school will be aware they are new and will therefore make an effort to keep an eye out, introduce them etc.

Also, do you not remember, as a kid, the excitement when a new child arrived?
They will be indundated by children wanting to play with them, most probably.

I think it was a good idea sending my DD for the day. Not least because on the first day of term, we received a party invitation, which has smoothed things very nicely in terms of making friends (including for me getting to know other parents briefly). Mum in question said her dd remembered that there was a new girl starting and her name, so DD got an invitation to a party she would otherwise have missed out on!

mylittlemonsters Wed 24-Sep-08 22:40:32

Any advice on the thread I have posted in Education (sorry not sure how I post the link here)

MadBadandDangeroustoKnow Wed 24-Sep-08 22:53:54

My child changed schools at Y2. We didn't go for a formal visit beforehand, although we did go into the school just to see the classroom and very briefly meet the teacher so it didn't seem so daunting on the first day.

I understand that school records travel with the child from school to school - the new school will contact the old one to request them - but that can take a while and the head teacher seemed genuinely pleased that I took in a copy of my child's school report. I guess it helps the teacher to know something about the child.

MadBadandDangeroustoKnow Wed 24-Sep-08 22:56:49

Should have added that my daughter already had some friends at the new school, which was a great help, and I signed her up for an after school activity as I thought that would help her get to know her new classmates. She got an invitation to tea on her first day. Girls (even more than boys, I think) seem keen to befriend anyone new.

julesrose Thu 25-Sep-08 11:49:13

My dd started a new school at the beginning of year one but the previous term was invited for half a day to join in with the class. Although she was nervous it did go well. 2 girls had been allocated to look after her and the whole class gave her pictures to take away in a 'welcome to our class' envelope. Afterwards I asked her what she thought of it and she said 'fantastic.' It certainly allayed a lot of anxiety about the move - I'd recommend it. Good luck.

hatwoman Thu 25-Sep-08 13:59:44

thanks all - esp re the going for a day thing.

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